Which cheered them up no end, and they went out blessing him and tugging their forelocks—and they were no sooner through the fly than he snatched a pistol from his belt, shoved it between his teeth, and squeezed the trigger—and it misfired. But he was a trier, the same Theodore; before I’d time to think “That’s your sort, old man!” he’d thumbed back the second hammer, and if Engedda hadn’t made a flying dive, the interfering ass, and knocked the piece from his hand, the pavilion canopy would have needed laundering, for this barrel went off splendidly and blew a hole in the tent-pole. After which Theodore groaned, sighed, threw his shama over his face, lay down, and went to sleep.
I, out of sheer curiosity, picked up the pistol and took the cap from the barrel that had misfired. It looked sound, so I tapped it smartly with the pistol butt, and it cracked with a puff of smoke. Why it had missed fire, heaven knows; perhaps there’s a fate that looks after mad monarchs.
Dr Blanc told me later that when they received the summons to go down to Theodore, they were sure they were going to die. The Abs guarding them were full of woe and weeping, bidding them farewell, and when they came down the track from the Kobet Bar Gate of Magdala and across the Islamgee plain towards the Fala saddle, sure enough there was a firing party waiting for them, and your correspondent having the conniptions as I watched the ragged little party plodding towards us. For when a messenger had come to tell Theodore they were on their way, he had suddenly roused himself, bidden me sharply to accompany him, and strode out on to the Islamgee plain, calling for a file of musketeers.
He stopped on the edge of the precipice, a bare couple of furlongs from the spot where he’d massacred the prisoners (whose corpses, you’ll be charmed to know, were still lying in heaps on the rocks below, in our full view) and ordered the musketeers to fall in against the cliff which rose sheer behind us. The road on which we stood was no more than a narrow ledge between the cliff and the drop. Theodore beckoned me to his side, and when the pris oners hove in view round a bend in the road he sent his lad Gabr to tell Rassam to approach alone. At this Engedda, who had stalked after us with a face of thunder, demanded to know what was to do.
“Will you let them go?” bawls he. “Will you fawn on this crea ture—and you, a king, and he a white cur?” Talk about bearding the lion, but Theodore only waved him away and went to meet Rassam, shaking hands, inquiring warmly after his health, sitting him down on a rock and asking if he wanted to go down to Napier now, or wait till next day, since it would soon be dusk. Rassam said, whatever suited his majesty, and Theodore began to cry, and burst out: “Go now, then, and the peace of God go with you! You and I have always been friends, and I beg you to bear in mind that if ever you cease to befriend me, I shall kill myself!”
If I’d been Rassam, I’d have gone while the going was good, for with Theodore it never stayed good for long, but he was a sparky little ha’porth, glancing back at the others waiting, and then looking a question at Theodore, who cried: “Or I may become a monk!” Rassam asked, what about the others, and Theodore shouted: “You had better go! Yes, go now!” He gestured angrily as Rassam hesi tated before turning away. “Go, I say! Begone, in the name of God!”
But Rassam didn’t go more than a yard before he stopped, and Theodore snatched a piece from the nearest musketeer and cocked it, Engedda gave a cry of triumph, and I thought, oh, Jesus, this is where it ends, for even if he spares Rassam who’s his favourite he means to do for the rest of us including me… for he’d turned away from Rassam to face the remaining prisoners, and he was mouthing and weeping and presenting his musket as they began to walk towards us.
There weren’t above a dozen of them, and who most of ’em were I can’t tell you, for I never inquired, but the one in front saved all their lives, and no doubt mine. He was Henry Blanc, the Bombay medico, bluff, burly, and a bearcat for nerve, for he was sure his time was up, but here he came at a steady stride, head high and beard a-bristle, and “Good day, your majesty!” says he, while Theodore glared tearfully with his finger twitching on the trigger, and that brisk greeting, so unexpected, had him all adrift, and he gave back a pace, lowering his piece, and absolutely asked Blanc how he did, and bade him farewell as he passed by to join Rassam. And I know, for I’ve seen things on the knife-edge all too often, that if Blanc had shown fear, or even hesitated, the Abyssinian expedition would have ended in bloody failure with the prisoners butchered by that madman and his musketeers. Well, he didn’t funk nor hesitate, and since it’s thanks to him that I’m here to write this memoir, well, here’s to Henry Blanc, M.D., staff assistant surgeon to H.M. Bombay Army. Saluel [50]
After that it was plain sailing, for Theodore’s wild fit passed, he put aside his musket, and cried farewell blessings on the others as they edged past him on the narrow road, all smiles in their relief except Cameron, limping on his stick, for when Theodore said he hoped they were parting friends, Cameron bade him adieu with a curt nod and went by.
And that was how the famous prisoners of Magdala walked down the Fala track to freedom—not all of ’em, by any means, for there were about forty more still up on the amba, women and kids and hangers-on, but Cameron’s little crowd were the principals, the ones the fuss had been all about. [51] When the last of them had gone by, Theodore stood staring after them as if they’d been his departing family, and blow me if he didn’t start to blubber again, and sank down on a rock with his head in his hands. It was too much for Engedda.
“Are you a woman, that you cry?” shouts he. “Let us bring them back, those white men, kill them, and run away! Or let us fight and die!”
Theodore was on his feet in a second, blazing. “Fool! Dog! Donkey! Have I not killed enough these past two days? D’you want me to kill these, too, and cover Habesh in blood?”
I’d never seen a man stand toe to toe with Theodore, and if he’d pistolled Engedda on the spot I’d not have been surprised, but he just stared him out of countenance, and Engedda growled in disgust and turned on his heel. Theodore passed a hand over his eyes and gestured after the departing prisoners. “Do you not wish to go with your friends, Ras Flashman? It is done now. You are free to go.”
Ironic, you’ll agree. A few hours earlier, I’d have been up and away with a roundelay… but since then Prideaux had brought Napier’s orders, and they were not to be disobeyed, not if I was to keep my credit. Well, it was no great matter now; Theodore was crying uncle, the Queen’s man was back in the Queen’s keeping, and all that remained was the occupation of Magdala by her forces—and the disposal of its ruler, whatever that might entail. I was bound to stay, so I came to attention, regimental as you please.
“Thank’ee, your majesty, but with your permission I’ll stay awhile. Perhaps I can be of service to your majesty.”
He frowned, bewildered, and then the tears were welling in his eyes again, coursing down the black cheeks as he clasped my hand and regarded me with owlish emotion.
“Oh, my friend, my dear friend in Christ! My soldiers betray me, my people turn against me, my generals revile me… and from the ranks of my enemies comes one friend to stand by me!” He wrung my fin like a pump handle. “Ah, you strange British! I did not know you until now! There are no people like you in all the world! None, none, I say!”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” says I, but he swore in choked accents that it was so, and sat down on his rock again, howling with sentiment and mopping his face. Then he had a quick pray, saying he had hardened his heart for many years, but now God had softened it, with some assistance from me, and Satan had been at work on him, but was now driven out, and he regretted the dis courtesy of his letter to Napier, and must put that right.