“I want my mail.”
“I can call him and ask him to bring it.”
He had forgotten about the pocket-com. “Please do that,” he said, and Jago tried.
And tried. “I can’t reach him,” Jago said.
“Is he all right?” The matter of the mail diminished in importance, but not, he feared, in significance. Too much had gone on that wasn’t ordinary.
“I’m sure he is.” Jago gathered up the cards. “Do you want to play again?”
“What if someone broke in here and you needed help? Where do you suppose he is?”
Jago’s broad nostrils flared, “I have resources, nadi Bren.”
He couldn’t keepfrom offending her.
“Or what if hewas in trouble? What if they ambushed him in the halls? We might not know.”
“You’re very full of worries tonight.”
He was. He was drowning in what was atevi; and that failure to understand, in a sudden moment of panic, led him to doubt his own fitness to be where he was. It made him wonder whether the lack of perception he had shown with Jago had been far more general, all along—if it had not, with some person, led to the threat he was under.
Or, on the other hand, whether he was letting himself be spooked by his guards’ zealousness because of some threat of a threat that would never, ever rematerialize.
“Worries about what, paidhi?”
He blinked, and looked by accident up into Jago’s yellow, unflinching gaze. Don’t you know? he thought. Is it a challenge, that question? Is it distrust of me? Why these questions?
But you couldn’t quite say ‘trust’ in Jago’s language, either, not in the terms a human understood. Every house, every province, belonged to a dozen associations, that made webs of association all through the country, whose border provinces made associations across the putative borders into the neighbor associations, an endless fuzzy interlink of boundaries that weren’t boundaries, both geographical and interest-defined—‘trust,’ would you say? Say man’chi— ‘central association,’ the one association that defined a specific individual.
“ Man’china aijiia nai’am,” he said, to which Jago blinked a third time. I’m the aiji’s associate, foremost. “ Nai’danei man’chini somai Banichi?” Whose associate are you and Banichi, foremost of all?
“ Tabini-aijiia, hei.” But atevi would lie to anyone but their central associate.
“Not each other’s?” he asked. “I thought you were very close, you and Banichi.”
“We have the same man’chi.”
“And to each other?”
He saw what might be truth leap through her expression—and the inevitable frown followed.
“The paidhi knows the harm in such a question,” Jago said.
“The paidhi-aiji,” he said, “knows what he asks. He finds it his duty to ask, nadi.”
Jago got up from the table, walked across the room and said nothing for a while. She went to look out the garden doors, near the armed wire—it made him nervous, but he thought he ought not to warn her, just be ready to remind her. Jago was touchy enough. He hadn’t quite insulted her. But he’d asked into a matter intensely personal and private.
“The Interpreter should know he won’t get an honest answer,” she’d implied, and he’d said, plain as plain to her politically sensitive ears, “The Interpreter serves the aiji by questioning the true hierarchy of your intimate alignments.”
Freely translated—Faced with betraying someone, the aiji or Banichi… which one would you betray, Jago?
Which haveyou?
Fool to ask such a question, when he was alone in a room with her?
But he was alone in the whole country, for that matter, one human alone with three hundred million atevi, and billions around the world, and he was obliged to ask questions—with more intelligence and cleverness than he had just used, granted; but he was tired enough now, and crazed enough, to want to be sure of at least three of them, of Tabini, Banichi, and Jago, before he went any further down the paved and pleasant road of belief. There was too much harm he could do to his own species, believing a lie, going too far down a false path, granting too much truth to the wrong people—
Because he wasn’tjust the aiji’s interpreter. Hehad a primary association that outranked it, an association that was stamped on his skin and his face—and that was the one atevi couldn’t help seeing, every time they looked at him.
He waited for Jago to think his question through—perhaps even to ask herself the questions about her own loyalties that atevi might prefer not to ask. Perhaps atevi minds, like human ones, held hundreds of contradictory compartments, the doors of which one dared not open wholesale and look into. He didn’t know. It was, perhaps, too much to ask, too personal and too dangerous. Perhaps questioning the loyalty atevi felt as a group inherently questioned a tenet of belief—and perhaps their man’chiconcept was, at bottom, as false as humans had always wished it was, longing at an emotional level for atevi to be and think and hold individual, interpersonal values like themselves.
The paidhi couldn’t believe that. The paidhi daren’t believe that deadliest and most dangerous of illusions. He was off the emotional edge.
And, perhaps recognizing that the paidhi was off the edge, Jago declined to answer him. She used the pocket-com again, asking Banichi if he was receiving—and still didn’t look at him.
Banichi still didn’t answer.
Frowning, then, perhaps for a different reason, Jago called headquarters, asking where Banichi was, or if anyone knew where he was—and, no, headquarters didn’t know.
Maybe Banichi was with some woman, Bren thought, although he decided he should keep that idea to himself, figuring Jago was capable of thinking of it for herself if it was at all likely. He wasn’t sure whether Banichi and Jago slept with each other. He had never been completely certain what the relationship was between them, except a close, years-long professional partnership.
He saw the frown deepen on Jago’s face. “Someone find out where he is,” she said into the com.
There were verbal codes; he knew that and he couldn’t tell whether the answer he overheard was one: “ Lab-work, ” HQ said, but Jago didn’t seem to like the answer, “Tell him contact me when he’s through,” Jago said to HQ, not seeming pleased, and shut the contact off on the affirmative.
“You had no sleep last night,” she said, in her smoother, professional tones, and, evading the wire, she slid the glass garden doors open on the lattice, “Please rest, nadi Bren.”
He was exhausted. But he had rather plain answers. And he was far from sure he wanted his garden doors open. Maybe theywere setting up a trap. He was in no mood tonight to be the sleeping bait.
“Nadi,” he said, “have you forgotten my question?”
“No, paidhi-ji.”
“But you don’t intend to answer.”
Jago fixed him with a yellow, lucent stare. “Do they ask such questions on Mospheira?”
“Always.”
“Not among us,” Jago said, and crossed the room to the door.
“Jago, say you’re not angry.”
Again that stare. She had stopped just short of the deadly square on the carpet, turned it off, and looked back at him. “Why ask such a futile question? You wouldn’t believe either answer.”
It set him back. And made him foreign and deliberate in his own reply.
“But I’m human, nadi.”
“So your man’chiisn’t with Tabini, after all.”