“You actually write several books,” said the Diplodocus. “Professor Steg’s Guide To Everything In The Whole Of The Future was my favorite. It’s very inspirational.”
I said good-bye to all the dinosaurs. I thanked Professor Steg for saving my life.
“Not at all,” she said. “We were both fortunate that you had the milk with you. It is not every container of milk that saves the world, after all.”
“That was me that saved the world,” I said. “Not the milk.”
The space dinosaurs all had their pictures taken holding the milk and smiling at the camera.
“What are you going to do with the milk?” they asked me. “Are you going to put it in a museum?”
“No, I am not,” I told them. “I am going to give it to my children for their breakfast cereal. And possibly I will pour some in my tea.”
Professor Steg nipped back up the rope ladder and climbed into the gondola of her balloon. The last I saw of her—of any of them—the whole inside of the saucer was fading into light so bright I had to close my eyes and look away.
And then I was standing at the back door of our house, none the worse for wear. Fortunately, the dinosaurs had given me back the milk after they had their photos taken with it.
So I came in.
And here I am.
That was what my dad said.
I looked at my sister and my sister looked at me.
Then we both looked around the kitchen. At the calendar on the wall with the hot air balloons on it. At my dinosaur models and my sister’s ponies, at my sister’s vampire books, at the picture of a volcano I had painted when I was little, last year, and which is still up on the wall by the fridge.
We looked at those things, and we looked at my dad.
“You know, we don’t believe any of this,” said my sister.
“We don’t,” I told him. “Not any of it.”
“Especially not how you saved the world from being remodeled. Or the pirates.”
“Not. Any. Of. It,” I said.
My father shrugged. “Suit yourselves,” he said. “But it was all true. And I can prove it.”
“How?”
“Yes. How?” asked my little sister.
“Well,” said my father, putting it down on the kitchen table, “here’s the MILK.”
AND HE WENT BACK
TO READING
HIS PAPER.
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About the Author and Illustrator
NEIL GAIMAN has written highly acclaimed books for both children and adults. He has won many major awards, including the Hugo and the Nebula, and his novel The Graveyard Book is the only work to ever win both the Newbery (US) and Carnegie (UK) Medals. His books for readers of all ages include the bestselling Coraline, also an Academy Award-nominated film; Odd and the Frost Giants; and The Wolves in the Walls. Originally from England, Gaiman now lives in the United States. Find out more about him and his books at www.mousecircus.com.
SKOTTIE YOUNG is an award-winning cartoonist and writer who illustrates New York Times bestselling adaptations of L. Frank Baum’s Oz novels for Marvel Entertainment. His unique art style and sensibilities have drawn acclaim worldwide, earning him multiple Eisner Awards. He has worked in comics, toys, and animation for Marvel, Warner Bros., Image Comics, Mattel, Cartoon Network, and many more. Skottie lives in Illinois, and you can visit him online at www.skottieyoung.com.
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BOOKS BY NEIL GAIMAN
Blueberry Girl
Chu’s Day
Coraline
Crazy Hair
The Dangerous Alphabet
The Day I Swapped My Dad for Two Goldfish
The Graveyard Book
Instructions
InterWorld
MirrorMask
M Is for Magic
Odd and the Frost Giants
Stardust
The Wolves in the Walls
Credits
Cover art © 2013 by Skottie Young
Cover design by Sarah Nichole Kaufman
Copyright
FORTUNATELY, THE MILK
Text copyright © 2013 by Neil Gaiman
Illustrations copyright © 2013 by Skottie Young
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this ebook on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins ebooks.
www.harpercollinschildrens.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Gaiman, Neil.
Fortunately, the milk / by Neil Gaiman; illustrated by Skottie Young. — First edition.
pages cm
Summary: While picking up milk for his children’s cereal, a father is abducted by aliens and finds himself on a wild adventure through time and space.
ISBN 978-0-06-222407-1 (hardcover bdgs)
ISBN 978-0-06-229515-6 (int’l ed.)
[1. Adventure and adventurers—Fiction. 2. Space and time—Fiction. 3. Fathers—Fiction. 4. Humorous stories.] I. Young, Skottie, illustrator. II. Title.
PZ7.G1273Fo 2013
2012050670
[Fic]—dc23
CIP
AC
EPub Edition © AUGUST 2013 ISBN: 9780062224095
13 14 15 16 17 LP/RRDH 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
FIRST EDITION
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