“Did she tell you what we told her one night?”
I looked down and strained my eyes trying to remember what she told me.
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“She said there was something you told her, that she was angry with you, but that she wasn’t ready to think about it and talk about it and I was cool with that. I knew it had something to do with her adoption, but she never said anything again after the first time she mentioned it to me and I didn’t push it.” Elaine closed her eyes and nodded.
“Yes, yes, it did have something to do with her adoption.”
“Why was she asking for her sister in there? She has a sister?” Ed put his hand on Elaine’s shoulder, looked at me and said, “Because, Cedric.
Amanda was an identical twin. She had a sister born five minutes after she was.” I was floored. There was another half of Amanda out there somewhere?
Holy Shit.
Elaine continued, “The adoptionagency only told us that the birth mother 518/727
was having a girl. A woman in Boston had apparently been promised the other girl.
Both sets of adoptive parents were told that the mother was having only one girl.
Legally, the babies were bound to the respective parents and since both were closed adoptions, there was no information given to us about the other child. The birth mother was a fifteen-year-old drug addict. I knew someone at the adoption agency who leaked this information to me years after Amanda was born, but we chose to keep it a secret until she turned eighteen when we would then tell her, because we felt she had a right to know.”
Elaine grabbed a tissue from her purse and wiped her eyes, then continued,
“We just didn’t want to turn her world upside down when the other mother and childhad no idea Amanda even existed. We don’thave much information on the sister, unfortunately, but promised Amanda that if she 519/727
wanted, we would look into trying to find her. We don’t even have her name.” I sighed in shock at what they just told me. How had Amanda kept this news from me these past few months?
Elaine wiped her eyes again. “She had dropped the subject recently and we thought maybe she was having doubts about finding her. But Cedric, clearly, if she called out to you asking to find her sister, our poor daughter is tormented. My poor baby.” Elaine began to cry uncontrollably now, as Ed comforted her.
I decided in that moment that I would do whatever it took to grant Amanda her wish to find her sister. I had no clue how I was going to do that, but I knew I owed it to her after all of the damage I had done. I couldn’t wait for her to wake up fully, so I could tell her myself and we could work together to find her. Maybe take a trip to Boston.
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That night, Amanda died.
CHAPTER 31
CEDRIC
Present Day
“What in God’s name happened to you?” Allison’s roommate Sonia asked as she arrived at the doorstep of my condo, staring me up and down, clearly amazed by my bearded transformation.
“Come in,” I said somberly, pointing my head in Allison’s direction.
Allison was sitting on my couch with her head in her hands, rubbing her temples, refusing to speak to me. I had grabbed her phone earlier before I started really trying to explain everything, pulled up Sonia’s name in the contacts and texted her my address to come pick up Allison immediately at my place without further explanation. Knowing 522/727
Allison wouldn’t have been in any condition to leave here on her own, I wanted to make sure someone could accompany her home.
Sonia arrived faster than I expected, since someone drove her here and she was apparently already close by at a bar in Kenmore Square when she got my text. That had given me under fifteen minutes to try and explain everything before Sonia got here.
Allison had sat in silent shock as I nervously told her bits and pieces of the truth. I wasn’t expecting to face this today and was unprepared, to say the least. I wasn’t quite sure if she even understood me clearly. She wasn’t saying anything and I was really worried about her state of mind.
I got far enough to tell her that the girl in the picture she was holding was named Amanda, that she was her twin sister and they were separated at birth, that Amanda was my college girlfriend and that Amanda died in an accident.
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But there were so many holes in my story and I couldn’t seem to articulate it all from the beginning to end.
She wasn’t responding coherently to me or asking any questions. She just kept shaking her head in disbelief and wouldn’t say anything when I demanded that she talk to me.
Before I could fully explain the role I played in finding her, Sonia knocked on the door. When I opened it, she burst in.
“Al…are you alright?” Sonia asked as she made her way over to Allison.
Allison shook her head no, her eyes red. She was clearly still in shock and my heart was breaking not being able to comfort her. I knew I was the last person she wanted near her, so I kept my distance standing across the room, still dressed in my robe since I had been unable to change in the time since Allison came here so unexpectedly.
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Sonia was glaring at me and rubbing Allison’s back and after a minute, Allison then managed to look at Sonia and say hoarsely, “Let’s go.”
Just as Allison stood up to leave, Sonia stopped her.
“Wait…what the hell is going on here?
You two weren’t even together, so you couldn’t have broken up…what in the bloody hell happened? She looked to me. “Cedric?
What’s so bad that you thought Allison couldn’t manage to take herself home safely?”
Neither Allison nor I said anything.
Sonia looked back and forth at us.
“No one is going to tell me what the hell is going on?”
A tear ran down Allison’s face and my fists clenched from not being able to wipe it from her cheek.
This moment was one of the worst of my entire life.
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I cleared my throat and forced myself to say something.
“Sonia, Allison may not want to say anything right now. She’s in shock because I just gave her some devastating news. When she is ready, she’ll tell you.” I looked over at Allison, noticing that for the first time gave me a rare bit of eye contact in return.
“And…Allison, when you’re ready, I need to explain more to you. I am so sorry I kept this from you all this time, but when you’re ready to hear it, I’ll try to explain why I did what I did,” I said.
I knew she was in no condition to hear anything more from me tonight. I had done enough damage for one day.
“I am not sure I can believe anything you have to say,” Allison said as she got up and suddenly opened the front door and walked out in tears.