His lips were on hers again. Harder. More desperate. Seeking out the one thing that she couldn’t give to anyone. Yet it was perfection. Every nerve in her body was attuned to his touch.
This was what she had always been missing.
Yet her emotions roiled through her body. How can he kiss me like this after he’d had his dick in some other girl? If he had wanted to be with Bryna, he’d had a million opportunities to tell her the truth. Yeah, she had said she wasn’t comfortable with him, but then when she was comfortable, he could have told her the truth. The truth was at his fingertips at every opportunity. He couldn’t pull this bullshit because she had caught him with his ex. She couldn’t pull a one-eighty on her life when there was so much fucking uncertainty.
Bryna wrenched out of his grasp. He gave her a questioning look, and then she reached back and slapped him clear across the face. His head snapped to the side, and he ground his teeth.
“Don’t touch me,” she repeated. Her voice was hoarse. She held the tears back with the force from her will alone.
Eric staggered a step back in shock. She used that opportunity to grab the handle of the door, and she pulled it back open.
“Bryna, please,” he begged. “Don’t go. Let’s try to work it out.”
“What is there to work out? You said it yourself. We both know this is never happening, and you’re going to regret this in the morning.” She threw his words back in his face.
“Let me explain,” he pleaded.
She couldn’t let him. Even if she wanted to listen and make things work, she couldn’t. It would never work between them. The last six months of their relationship, the supposed ease of their friendship, was all a lie. One big lie.
“You’ve explained enough.”
She sat down in the driver’s seat and then pulled out of his driveway. Her heart was beating a million miles a minute. It wasn’t until she was around the corner that she let the tears fall freely. Once they started, she couldn’t get them to stop.
BRYNA PULLED OVER TO THE SIDE of the road and parked her car. Shuddering deep sobs wracked her body. She had no idea she could even cry like this, that tears could even flow so freely. Her heart of ice had cracked, shattered, melted, and it was currently sitting in a puddle at her feet.
She didn’t even know what she was feeling. She was so angry with Eric for sleeping with Audrey, for being with her all this time. Yet she was angry with herself for being angry with him. She had been with someone else this whole time, too, but he had known. She had never kept Hugh a secret from Eric. She hadn’t kept anything a secret from Eric.
It was all even more fucked up because Eric had thought she had known all along about Audrey. And they had both kept their distance because of one stupid fucking night at Posse when she had been a mess about Jude, and Gates had pushed her and Eric apart.
Part of her wanted so desperately to turn the car around and go back to him. But the other part kept replaying the image of him fucking Audrey in his bedroom over and over again. How can I get over that?
“Why?” she whispered helplessly into the silent car.
For over a year, she had worked under the assumption that he was gay. She had opened herself up to him, only to have a wall slide back over her heart. Even though she had deceived herself, she still thought it was Eric’s fault. If he was falling for her, he should have said something. She couldn’t listen to her own heart telling her she had fallen for him.
Her hands were still shaking when the tears finally dried up. The rain was slowing to a drizzle. She forced herself to start driving again. She needed to get away and process.
Pulling out her cell phone, she ignored the missed call from Eric and dialed Hugh’s number.
“Hey,” Hugh said.
“Hey.” She thought her voice was strong, but she still sounded weak and vulnerable. She hated Eric for making her like this. It went against her nature.
“Are you okay?”
“I just…need you.” She didn’t know what else to say.
“I’m working out of town. Is it urgent? Are you hurt?”
Only emotionally. “No.”
Hugh sighed heavily into the phone. “I wish you’d tell me what’s wrong. You keep your secrets so close to your heart. Just let me in,” he pleaded.
If only I could tell him the truth…but what’s the truth at this point? She had lost sight of it in the chaos.
She bit her lip and decided to tell him as much as she could. It wasn’t like she could go into explicit detail about Eric. “I got into a huge argument with two of my best friends. I know it probably sounds dumb,” she admitted softly, “but I don’t think things will ever be the same. And it’s all my fault.”
That last part took her off guard. She hadn’t even known she was going to say that, but it felt true. She could have prevented the argument with Stacia if she had accepted Pace, but the thought of doing that made her want to throw up. She could have prevented the argument with Eric if she could accept his feelings, despite what had happened with Audrey, but that didn’t seem possible either right now.
“It’s not dumb,” Hugh said understandably. “If it has upset you this much, then it’s important.”
She swallowed back her tears at his words.
“I’m in Atlantic City. I’ll fly you out to see me, so you can get away from everything. How does that sound?”
“Really great,” she admitted.
She couldn’t think of anything better than escaping the reality of her life right now. She’d had to confront everything head-on recently, and she didn’t know how much more she could take.
“Good. I’ll have someone make all the arrangements. Try to relax, and you’ll be with me soon.”
Five hours later, a car picked her up from the airport and drove her to Hugh’s resort in Atlantic City. Though she had been groggy on the plane, she hadn’t been able to sleep, no matter what she had done. She was even more alert in the car. She couldn’t escape the images flashing through her mind or the reality of what she had been through.
When she arrived, Hugh was waiting for her in the lobby. She couldn’t believe he was awake. With the three-hour time difference, she couldn’t believe she was still awake.
“Why are you awake?” she asked.
“As if I could sleep after that call.” He pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her head. “Come on. You look like you need to sleep.”
“I’m not the only one.”
He laughed. “It’s morning here, love. I have to work.”
“Work when I leave.”
“I would love to do that.” They hopped into the elevator, and Hugh inserted his key to take them to the top floor. “But I can’t neglect my responsibilities. It’s nice to have you here. I’d travel with you everywhere if I could.”
She smiled at his words but didn’t respond. Her head was too clouded with other things, and she was tired.
They reached the penthouse where Hugh was staying. It was dark inside, and he didn’t bother to turn the lights on as he guided her to the master suite. The bed was enormous and unbelievably inviting.
“Why don’t you rest?” he suggested. “You’re dead on your feet. You can tell me all about what happened when you wake up.”
“Wait,” she murmured. She ran her hand down his tie. “Aren’t you coming with me?” She didn’t want to be alone tonight even though her mind told her it was the smart thing to do. She didn’t want to listen.
“You know I’d love nothing more, but I have to work.”