Thinking about Eric only made it worse. She had never been good at turning down sex, and when he had approached her, all of her desire for him had exploded into that one singular moment. It was a year of pent-up energy that had cracked open like fireworks in the night sky. But she couldn’t let it happen again. She didn’t want to lead him on or hurt him.
Jude had hurt her, and though Eric was far from Jude, he had the same ability to completely and utterly wreck her very existence, taking this semblance of control that she still clung to like a life raft and leave her drowning in the middle of the ocean.
God, I need to get a grip.
She clawed her clothes off her body and threw them in a pile in the corner of her room. Even though they reminded her of how she had let Eric fuck her in the locker room, she smiled at the mess. Then, she stepped into the giant waterfall shower and turned it to scalding. She stood under the spray until her body was pink and tender, letting the water wash away all remnants of what had passed between them.
She took time to blow her hair out, making it pencil-straight, and forced out the memory of him fingering the wavy tresses with such care. The person he had kissed wasn’t even her. It had been someone who was both mentally and physically exhausted that she hadn’t even taken time to do her hair. She couldn’t let herself do that again. Once she was finished, she slipped into a pair of black designer jeans and a black crop top.
There. Now, she felt more like herself. Except for this house. It still haunted her. She was slowly suffocating under the weight of Hugh’s presence here.
She had to get out. Picking up her phone, she dialed Trihn’s number.
“Hey!” Trihn said. “How was your first day back?”
“Eventful.”
“I bet! I’m in this new art class with Neal, and it’s amazing! What are you up to?”
“I’m at home.” She bit her lip, debating if she could do this. “Do, uh…do you think I could stay with you?”
“Like, at my apartment?” Trihn asked, confused.
“Yeah. I mean, for the night. I can’t be here for another second longer.”
“Sure. Of course. What’s wrong with your place?”
“Everything.” She sighed heavily. “It feels like the walls are closing in.”
“Sorry, B. Do you want to come over now?”
“Yeah. Let me pack a bag. Thanks, Trihn.”
She laughed lightly. “What are friends for? Of course, I never thought you would want to stay with me since you have that huge mansion, but Stacia and I have plenty of space at the new apartment!”
Bryna hadn’t felt left out when Trihn and Stacia decided to move in together. It’d made sense for them to do that. She had always liked her space, and with the guys she had been interested in, it was better to not have any roommates. Now, she was kind of wishing she had been included, a feeling she was not familiar with.
After she hung up, she quickly packed her Louis Vuitton carry-on and strode out of her house. She locked it up tight and immediately felt better. It was official. She couldn’t stay there any longer.
The drive to Trihn and Stacia’s new apartment was easy enough. She made it through the front gate, parked next to Stacia’s SUV, and took the elevator to the top floor. Trihn answered on the first knock and beckoned her inside.
The place was cute and way bigger than it looked from the outside. It took up nearly the entire top floor of the building with four bedrooms and baths and direct access to the pool. It wasn’t Bryna’s dream house, but look where that had gotten her. The apartment was cozy and warm, which was more than she could say for the house. More importantly, this place was full of her friends.
That meant it had to be better.
“Okay. Spill. What’s going on?” Trihn asked.
She looked at Bryna in that knowing way. Sometimes, it felt like Trihn could read her mind, and after what had happened with Eric, Bryna was really glad that she couldn’t.
“Nothing. Everything.” Bryna took a seat on the couch and tossed her bag at her feet.
“Well, I can tell. You look pretty run-down,” Trihn said, taking the seat across from her.
“Wow. Thanks!” she said sarcastically.
Stacia bounced into the room. Her blonde hair swished around her face as she walked. “Hey, B!”
“Hey.”
“You know what I mean,” Trihn said. “You look out of it. Not your normal pep.”
Bryna shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just the house.”
“Is it Hugh?” Stacia asked. She bit her lip and looked uncertainly at Trihn. “I know you were stressing since you came home from Barcelona, but I thought things were better.”
“They were,” she said softly. Then Eric happened. “I just feel off. Like I can’t live in that house anymore.” She looked down at her manicure. “I think I’m going to sell it.”
Both girls gasped.
“What?” Trihn asked.
“But it’s perfect!” Stacia cried.
“Yeah. It was,” Bryna agreed. “But now, it’s a reminder. It doesn’t feel right.”
“Man, it’s worse than I thought,” Trihn said. “It sounds like you’re having an identity crisis. Soon, you’re going to shed your designer clothing and give up the Aston Martin.”
“Whoa!” Bryna held her hand up. “Don’t get carried away. I just don’t want to always be reminded of what I did to get that house. I hurt a good man, and it didn’t feel good for either of us.”
“I know. I was joking. Mostly. I don’t like you like this, and if the house makes it worse, then you shouldn’t stay there.”
“So, are you going to move back into the condo?” Stacia asked.
“And live with Pace? Over my dead body!”
“Oh,” Stacia said.
Trihn laughed. “Good luck with that, Stacia.”
“Baby Zoe might make me understand Celia a bit better, but it doesn’t excuse Pace’s behavior. And I can’t live with him again.” Bryna shuddered at the thought.
She had reluctantly spent time with Pace at home over the summer break, and it’d felt like a repeat of senior year. He’d had no respect for personal boundaries, and they’d continually butted heads. He was better when he was around Stacia, but only because he’d tiptoe around her, and she’d keep him in line. At least that was a blessing.
“Why don’t you stay here?” Trihn offered. “We would have included you if you didn’t already have a place.”
“Wait, really?” Bryna asked. She had never expected them to offer her a place to stay. She had figured she would need to call her dad to see if he would get her a new place or dip into her trust to rent something while she worked it out.
“Yes!” Stacia cried. “Definitely!”
“Are you guys sure? I mean, I know you probably wanted the extra space.”
“We’re sure! We don’t need the extra space. We’d rather have you,” Trihn said.
“That’s right!” Stacia agreed. “You won’t change our minds now.”
Bryna smiled. How could I say no? She didn’t even want to say no. She felt like she had missed a lot while growing up without having real girlfriends or siblings. Trihn and Stacia were making up for it by a long shot.
“All right. I’ll do it!”
Stacia jumped up and down and threw herself at Bryna, tackling her with a hug. “This is going to be so much fun!”
“We need to go out for drinks to celebrate,” Trihn said. “Take it easy, S. You’re suffocating her.”
Stacia laughed and flopped down next to Bryna with a giant smile on her face.
“Drinks sound great,” Bryna agreed.
“Do either of you care if I invite Neal? We haven’t spent much time together since I’ve been back. He’s been a little weird actually.”
“Sure, I don’t mind,” Bryna said. “Weird, how?”
“I don’t know. Just busy I think.”
Bryna narrowed her eyes. What kind of guy would ignore his girlfriend after being apart for nearly the whole summer? But by the look in Trihn’s eyes, she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. She was upset, and she tended to internalize that.