"And you also."
"It's my battle, not yours. "
She didn't answer.
He threw up his hands and uttered another curse before turning on his heel and striding from the tent.
He was wrong, she thought. Didn't he realize that his battles would be hers always? As long as she lived she would be—
As long as she lived.
Shock made her go rigid as she stared blindly at the tent opening through which he had disappeared. Merde, what was she thinking? She wanted to be bound to no man.
Yet she was bound to Galen Ben Raschid, not only by vows and the pleasure of the flesh, but by a deeper bond.
"No!" She wanted no bonds that would hold her to either Galen or Sedikhan. She wanted to be free. It was not love. What she felt was only lust and respect for a man possessing unusual qualities. Their companionship and joint purpose had brought them closer than was common, but it couldn't be—
And he did not love her.
Pain swept through her, catching her off guard. If she didn't love him, then why did that realization hurt her?
She glanced down at the brocade gown she had donned to keep him from going to another woman. She should have realized how dangerous a reaction that had been.
She was only dazzled by the pleasure he gave her. Pauline had been similarly besotted with one of her swains for a full two weeks before she came to her senses.
But Tess was not Pauline, and she did not forget easily.
She would not think about it. She would keep herself so busy that she would not have time to think about Galen or this mysterious link they had forged. She would distance herself from him.
Yes, that was the thing to do. As she had kept Dala active in her time of trial, so she would treat her own affliction.
It was after midnight when Tess heard Galen enter the tent and begin disrobing. She breathed shallowly, hoping he would believe she was asleep.
Soon he slipped onto the divan beside her and lay there without speaking for a few moments.
"You're not sleeping." Galen turned over to look at her in the darkness.
"No."
"I would have returned earlier, but Hakim wished to discuss the laws of justice of—"
"It didn't matter."
He was silent a moment before he said haltingly, "I didn't mean to swear at you. I was… concerned. "
"My feelings aren't so tender as to be damaged by harsh words. "
"Aren't they?" He reached over and gently touched the plane of her cheek. "I believe they are, kilen."
She shut her eyes tightly to keep back the tears. Foolishness. This wave of emotion sweeping through her was madness. Just because he touched her with tenderness was no reason to weep like an infant not yet out of swaddling clothes. Yes, the decision to distance herself from him had been even wiser than she had thought. "You're mistaken. I'm only awake because it's too hot to sleep."
"Odd. I thought the night cool." His hand reached out and cupped her breast. "Your flesh isn't warm." He chuckled as he felt her nipple hardening beneath his palm. "But I do detect a certain heat."
"You've trained me well, haven't you? You should be very proud." She removed his hand and edged away from him. "I doubt that even Daphne learned her duty so quickly."
"Duty?"
"To pleasure you, to bear your child. Isn't that my duty?" Her voice was uneven, and she quickly steadied it. "Well, I've been thinking, and I believe I've done enough for the time being to demonstrate my compliance."
He stiffened. "And?"
"I do not wish you to touch me."
He muttered an oath. "Dammit, Tess, I told you I regretted—"
"Your words had nothing to do with my decision. Bed play was amusing, but I've grown weary of all this fondling."
He gave a disbelieving laugh. "You weren't weary early this morning when you rode me like a wind demon on a—"
"I do not wish to speak of it." And she did not want to think of that joining. The memory was already starting a tingling through her body. "However, I'll tell you if my feelings change."
"Thank you." The irony in his voice verged on sarcasm. "I'll be grateful for any small crumb you deign to toss me. I believe we'd best come to an understanding. I have no intention of—" He abruptly fell silent. When he spoke again, his tone was coaxing. "Talk to me, Tess. Tell me what's wrong."
"Nothing." She closed her eyes and edged a little farther away from him. "I'm weary. I wish to sleep now."
"Now, you wish to sleep?" Exasperation and frustration had banished gentleness. "You throw me into this turmoil and then you decide you'll just go to sleep?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's not going to be—"
She sensed he was subduing emotion, gathering control about him again.
"Very well, sleep." He turned over and presented his back to her. "I can wait."
He had been waiting all his life. Waiting for affection that never came, waiting for the wars to end, waiting for his task to be done. Dear Lord, she wanted to touch him in comfort. She wanted to hold him close and rock him and tell him…
Her nails bit into her palms to keep herself from reaching out to him. She must not touch him. If she could endure this night, tomorrow would be better.
She just must not touch him…
Chapter 10
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She hadn't stopped since dawn.
Galen paused in the entrance of Hakim's tent and watched moodily as Tess moved swiftly across the clearing with Viane, talking brightly, gesturing almost feverishly. She had been gone when he awakened, and he had only caught glimpses of her for the greater part of the morning. She had been a whirlwind of energy, trailing behind Viane, helping to supervise the erecting and furnishing of the tents, and the setting up of the refreshment tables. He had even seen her frowning seriously as she tasted stew from one of the kettles simmering over the wood fires.
Cooking, for Lord's sake. Tess hated the humdrum details of even supervising the kitchens at the palace. He knew very well that something was amiss when she lingered over a cooking pot. But what was wrong, dammit?
She had changed, grown evasive and cool. Yet coolness was foreign to her nature, and no one was more blunt than Tess. Last night when she had turned away from him, he had felt angered and betrayed, as if her withdrawal had robbed him of something precious.
Pleasure. She had robbed him of the pleasure of her body. She had made a bargain, and had no right to cheat him. This rawness he felt was not hurt but frustration, because he had become accustomed to her body and no one else could satisfy him. He should have told her that he would not tolerate her spurning him as she had done last night. He should have forced her to give him what—
"Is something wrong?"
He had been so deep in thought that he hadn't heard Kalim's approach. "What could be wrong? Every sheikh of the nine tribes has arrived, and they're even listening to me."
"You were frowning." Kalim shrugged. "I came to tell you that we've received a message from one of the hill tribes. "