1.
1. Make Father Mickey lose his black Irish temper.
This part will be succesful because there is nobody in the world who is better at getting under somebody’s skin. My sister could make Job blow his stack. She’s going to threaten Father. Warn him that she’s going to tell the police on him for stealing Mrs. Galecki’s emerald necklace, which is what I told her to do in the first place, so when you get down to it, whatever happens tonight is all my fault.
2. Wear a turtleneck, take in a deep breath and get strangled.
Troo thinks that after our pastor goes crazy with fear over getting sent to prison, he’s gonna wrap his hands around her throat and try to squeeze the life out of her. Only she forgot to wear the turtleneck tonight.
3. Mary Lane takes the picture.
After Father starts choking my sister, that’s when Mary Lane is going to get out her camera and shout, “Big cheese,” so Father will turn her way and that flashbulb will go off in his eyes and he’ll be so shocked and blinded that he’ll let go of Troo and she’ll run outta the front door of the rectory. Troo thinks a snapshot of Father Mickey trying to strangle her will be the very proof we need. Once we show it to Dave and everybody else in the neighborhood, they will see how awful he is and will have to believe the rest of the stuff we tell them. (Priests can smack you whenever they want to, but we’re all fairly sure strangling isn’t allowed.)
4. Practice getting away.
I used Daddy’s watch to time Troo when she stood on the rectory porch this morning while Father Mickey was saying his regular eight o’clock Mass. She ran in place to get going and then made a sharp right turn at the new school hole in five seconds and woulda been faster if she didn’t keep getting tangled up in those concrete poles that surround it.
5. Sally puts the pedal to the metal.
The second Troo comes ripping outta the front door with Father Mickey in hot pursuit, I’m supposed to jump out from a nook in the school where I’ll be waiting. He won’t know it’s me and not her because of the flashbulb spots in front of his eyes and I’ll be so far ahead of him with my fly-like-the-wind speed and by that time, it should be dark.
6.
Rendezvous
Tearing around the big school hole as fast as she can, Troo’s going to run down the block to meet up with Mary Lane and Artie, who will be at the church already. The three of them are going to hide in one of the confessionals because even if the plan goes wrong and Father finds them, he can’t hurt them because they are seeking sanctuary in the house of God. (We saw that in a movie with bank robbers.)
It isn’t the worst plan Troo’s ever come up with, the one to catch murdering and molesting Bobby Brophy was, but it still seems too much like skating on thin ice to me. Black thin ice.
Dave is saying to me, “Sally?” in a way that I know he has said it more than once.
When I turn his way, he’s grinning and pointing across the street at the Piaskowskis’ house. “I forgot to tell you that Betsy and her husband are moving back in tomorrow.” He’s done a great job of making that empty house look like a home again. The grass is cut, the porch is swept and he even gave a new coat of paint to the little blue birdhouse he made for Junie. “They’re both looking forward to getting to know you better.”
I’m looking forward to that, too. If I make it through the night.
Troo is swinging her legs out from beneath the table.
She calls to Mother, who has started walking with Granny toward our station wagon that is parked out on the street, “I’m goin’ over to the rectory now, Helen, for my religious instruction, just like you told me to.”
Mother stops and says, “Fine,” and Granny says, “You little banshee,” and they go right back at each other.
Dave tells me, “I talked to Father Mickey earlier. He’s going to give Troo a ride over to the park after her instruction.” Everybody is going straight from here to Washington Park to hear Music Under the Stars, they wouldn’t miss it. “Paulie’s already left for work, so I put the baby’s buggy in the third seat of the car. You can sit on Nell’s lap on the way over there.”
“I’m not goin’. I’m gonna wait for Troo.”
It’s the first time I’ve said a word to him the entire fish fry. I feel so fidgety about what we’re about to do that I’m afraid if I try talking my voice is going to sound like I got a Mexican jumping bean stuck in my throat. Dave’s my father, but he’s also a detective. Both of those jobs mean you know when a kid is up to something.
Dave places his hand on my forehead and says to me, “Are you feelin’ okay?”
“Just peachy!” I say with a laugh that even to me sounds Virginia Cunningham loonie. I’m sure he’s getting ready to question me further, but then Mother calls to him, “Dave! We’re waiting.”
“Be right there,” he hollers back, but his eyes don’t leave mine. “The concert starts at eight thirty like always. Ask Father to drop the two of you by the statue. We’ll be in our usual spot.”
“Sounds… sounds… good,” I say. So good that I want to follow after him to the car, sit on Nell’s lap with Peggy Sure in my arms and bury my nose in her neck all the way over to the park and forget this whole darn plan. I wish so bad I could leave with him now to go lie out on our plaid blanket and listen to the orchestra and stare up at the stars and not think for one more second how my sister is already halfway across the playground, halfway to the rectory.
Chapter Twenty-nine
By the time the church bell rings eight times, all that’s left is the four of us.
We had to wait to get the plan underway until after the janitors took the tables back into the cafeteria and cleaned up the playground mess. I can hear the last of our neighbors’ voices calling to each other down the block. Anybody who drove a car is already at the park staking out a good spot on the grass for the concert.
Artie and Mary Lane are at the back of the rectory. They should be crouching outside Father Mickey’s office window by now and I’m where I’m supposed to be, too. In the nook of the school, dying to poke my head out and call to Troo, who is on the porch, Pretty please with sugar on top, let’s forget this whole thing and go listen to Music Under the Stars. I’ll give you my root beer and my leather coin purses and anything else you want for the rest of our lives, but my sister doesn’t get my mental telepathy, or maybe she does and rings the rectory doorbell anyway. I can hear the chimes, that’s how close I am.
From somewhere inside, a light goes on and Father Mickey calls out, “Come in, my child,” and that’s just what Troo does, making sure that she leaves the front door open a crack so it’s easier for her to make a getaway.
I’m watching the minutes tick by on Daddy’s watch and when it gets quarter past the hour, I think that Troo’s been in there way too long. I’m sure the plan isn’t going the way she thought it would. What if she needs my help and I’m standing here twiddling my thumbs? The only way I have of hearing what’s happening inside with her and Father Mickey is by leaving my hiding spot and going to listen in. Because of the heat that feels like somebody is holding a feather pillow over my face in the shower, every single one of the rectory windows is open as far as they go. When I press my ear against the screen of the nearest one, the one next to the front door, I can make out voices, but not clearly. Artie and Mary Lane, who are on the opposite side of the building, are closer to the action and must be getting an earful and hopefully soon a good picture of Father Mickey trying to choke Troo and then we can meet up in the confessional and all of us can go over to the park.