"I can't arbitrarily end someone's life because of something they may have done."
"Bianca's a vampire," Bob pointed out cheerfully. "She's not alive in the classic sense. I'll get Mister and go fetch the bullets and you—"
I sighed. "No, Bob. She's got lots of people around her, too. I'd probably have to kill some of them to get to her."
"Oh. Damn. This is one of those right and wrong issues again, isn't it."
"Yeah, one of those."
"I'm still confused about this whole morality thing, Harry."
"Join the club," I muttered. I took a shaking breath and leaned forward to put my hand over the circle, and will it broken. I almost cringed when its protective field faded from around me, but forced myself not to. I was as recovered as I was going to get. I needed to focus on work.
I stood up and walked to my work table, my eyes by now adjusted to the dimness. I reached for the nearest candle, but there weren't any matches handy. So, I pointed my finger at it, frowned, and muttered the words, "Flickum bicus."
My spell, a tiny one I had used thousands of times, stuttered and coughed, the energy twitching instead of flowing. The candle's wick smoked, but did not flicker to life.
I frowned, then closed my eyes, made a little bit of an effort, and repeated the spell. This time, I felt a little surge of dizziness, and the candle flickered to life. I braced one hand on the edge of the table.
"Bob," I asked. "Were you watching that?"
"Yeah," Bob said, a frown in his voice.
"What happened?"
"Um. You didn't put enough magic into the spell, the first time around."
"I put as much as I always do," I protested. "Come on, I've done that spell a million times."
"Seventeen hundred and fifty-six, that I've seen."
I gave him a pale version of my usual glower. "You know what I mean."
"Not enough power," Bob said. "I call 'em like I see 'em."
I stared at the candle for a second. Then muttered, to myself, "Why did I have to work to make that thing light up?"
"Probably because the Nightmare took a big bite out of your powers, Harry."
I turned around, very slowly, to blink at Bob. "It … it did what?"
"When it attacked you, in your dream, did it go after a specific place on your body?"
I put my hand to the base of my stomach, pressing there, and felt my eyes go wide.
Bob winced. "Oooooo, chakra point. That isn't good. Got you right in the chi."
"Bob," I whispered.
"Good thing he didn't go after your mojo though, right? I mean, you have to look on the bright side of these—"
"Bob," I said, louder. "Are you saying it … it ate my magic?"
Bob got a defensive look on his face. "Not all of it. I woke you up as quick as I could. Harry, don't worry about it, you'll heal. Sure, you might be down for a couple of months. Or, um, years. Well, decades, possibly, but that's only a very outside chance—"
I cut him off with a slash of my hand. "He ate part of my power," I said. "Does that mean that the Nightmare is stronger?"
"Well, naturally, Harry. You are what you eat."
"Dammit," I snarled, pressing one hand against my forehead. "Okay, okay. We've really got to find this thing now." I started pacing back and forth. "If it's using my power, it makes me responsible for what it does with it."
Bob scoffed. "Harry, that's irrational."
I shot him a look. "That doesn't make it any less true," I snapped.
"Okay," Bob said, meekly. "We have now left Reason and Sanity Junction. Next stop, Looneyville."
"Grrrr," I said, still pacing. "We have to figure out where this thing is going to hit next. It's got all night to move."
"Six hours, thirteen minutes," Bob corrected me. "Shouldn't be hard. I've been reading those journals you got from the ectomancer, while you were sleeping. The thing can show up in nightmares, but there's going to be commonality between all of it. Ghosts can only have the kind of power this Nightmare has while they are acting within the parameters of their specific bailiwick."
"Baili-what?"
"Look at it this way, Harry. A ghost can only affect something that relates directly to its death somehow. Agatha Hagglethorn couldn't have terrorized a Cubs game. That wasn't where her power was. She could mess with infants, with abusive husbands, maybe with abused wives—"
"And meddling wizards," I mumbled.
"You put yourself in the line of fire, sure," Bob said. "But Agatha couldn't just run somewhere willy-nilly and wreak havoc."
"The Nightmare's got to have a personal beef in this," I said. "That's what you're saying."
"Well. It has to be related to its demise, somehow. So, yeah. I guess that is what I'm saying. More specifically, it's what Mort Lindquist was saying, in his journals."
"Me," I said. "And Lydia. And Mickey Malone. How the hell do all of those relate? I never saw Lydia before in my life." I frowned. "At least, I don't think I have."
"She's kind of an oddball," Bob agreed. "Leave her out of the equation for a minute?"
I did, and it came to me as clearly as a beam of sunlight. "Dammit," I said. I turned and ran toward the stairs on my unsteady legs, started hauling myself up them and toward the phone.
"What?" Bob called after me. "Harry, what?"
"If that thing is the demon's ghost, I know what it wants. Payback. It's after the people that took it down." I yelled back down the stairs, "I've got to find Murphy."
Chapter Nineteen
There's a kind of mathematics that goes along with saving people's lives. You find yourself running the figures without even realizing it, like a medic on a battlefield. This patient has no chance of surviving. That one does, but only if you let a third die.
For me, the equation broke down into fairly simple elements. The demon, hungry for its revenge, would come after those who had struck it down. The ghost would only remember those who had been there, whom it had focused on in those last moments. That meant that Murphy and Michael would be its remaining targets. Michael had a chance of protecting himself against the thing—hell, maybe a better chance than me. Murphy didn't.
I got on the phone to Murphy's place. No answer. I called the office, and she answered with a fatigue-blurred, "Murphy."
"Murph," I said. "Look, I need you to trust me on this one. I'm coming down there and I'll be there in about twenty minutes. You could be in danger. Stay where you are and stay awake until I get to you."
"Harry?" Murphy asked. I could hear her starting to scowl. "You telling me you're going to be late?"
"Late? No, dammit. Look, just do what I said, all right?"
"I do not appreciate this crap, Dresden," Murphy growled. "I haven't slept in two days. You told me you'd be here in ten minutes, and I told you I'd wait."
"Twenty. I said twenty minutes, Murph."
I could feel her glare over the phone. "Don't be an asshole, Harry. That's not what you said five minutes ago. If this is some kind of joke, I am not amused."
I blinked, and a cold feeling settled into my gut, into the hollow place the Nightmare had torn out of me. The phone line snapped, crackled, and popped, and I struggled to calm down before the connection went out. "Wait, Murphy. Are you saying you talked to me five minutes ago?"
"I am about two seconds short of killing the next thing that pisses me off, Harry. And everything keeping me out of bed is pissing me off. Don't get added to the list." She hung up on me.