"It is a bit confusing," I agreed, to keep her from giving me a pop quiz on the rules. "Is Carl the only one who plays regularly?"
"No, actually, I think Farley goes with him quite a bit, and Dominick and Linda will go occasionally just to mooch free chips and soda. I remember Mike saying something about shoving a fireplace poker through Carl's left nostril if he didn't shut up about that stupid game, so I don't think he's a regular."
"Do you know where they play? I've been looking for a player's group for a while, but I've never been able to find one."
"They play in the basement ofBalder's Dash on Thursdays. As far as I know they're on for tonight, though you might want to ask Carl to make sure."
What a happy coincidence! I'd looked seven-to-one odds in the face and come out victorious!
"I don't think I'll be able to make it tonight," I lied, "but I might mention it to him some other time. So here're a couple of questions. First, could we possibly tag along when you're filming one of these things? And, second, is there some time we could meet, just us, to talk outside of work?"
"I hope you're not asking me out," she said. "I'm flattered, but I can very clearly see that little ball and chain around your ring finger."
"No, no, it's strictly professional. You look pretty strong, but my wife has access to a drawer full of kitchen knives and knows where I sleep. No, it's that whole human interest deal...what do the people who work at Ghoulish Delights do in their spare time?"
Roger walked into the waiting room with Linda, his throat intact again. "He's all yours," Linda told me with a wide grin.
"Thanks," I said. "Looking snazzy,Rog ."
"I agree. Your throat has never looked better," Rachel commented. To me, she said "How about we meet tomorrow atVon's Gym, 6 A.M.?"
"Um, I've heard rumors that such an hour of the morning exists, but so far it's unconfirmed."
"Great, six o'clock then. I assume you don't have a membership, so you'll need to tell the guy at the front desk that you're there to see me. And as for tagging along with us, we have an appointment tomorrow at noon, and if you show up here around eleven we'll be more than happy to have you."
We thanked her and left the house. "Why do you think she assumed I don't have a gym membership?" I asked Roger as I shut the door behind me.
"I guess she missed all those muscles bursting through your shirt," he replied."A common problem, to be honest."
"Shut up."
"You asked, I told. Hey, what's that on your car?"
There was indeed something on the hood of my car, a bright red box, about one foot square, covered with yellow stars. When we reached the car and saw it up close, it was revealed to be a jack-in-the-box.
"Okay, so what the hell is this all about?" Roger asked.
It was a perfectly innocent-looking jack-in-the-box, but I wasn't sure we were going to like the answer.
Chapter 8
"IT'S NO BIG deal," I said, trying to sound casual."Just a jack-in-the-box. Turn the crank, hear a catchy tune,see a clown pop up, squeal with delight."
"Uh-huh. So why is it sitting here on your car?"
"That I can't answer."
"You think the killer put it here, as a warning?"
"How should I know? I don't even think anyone inthereis the killer! One of them, or all of them, probably just stuck it out here as a prank. We'll turn the handle and see a clown with an axe in his head or something."
"Or it could explode and kill us both," Roger pointed out.
"Now you're getting a little paranoid. Do you think the killer just happened to have a booby-trapped jack-in-the-box sitting around in case we showed up?"
"I don't know, but I certainly welcome you to turn the handle and see what happens. I'll be way the hell over there behind that tree."
"Okay, look, this is stupid. I'll pick it up, march right back in there, and demand to know who put it out here."
"It could have been any of them," said Roger. "Rachel could've done it while I was in the back being tortured, and anyone else could've done it while we were in the waiting room."
"If there's a back door, yeah.Farley could have snuck out unnoticed when Carl came out to gripe about his tripod. Were Dominick and Linda with you the whole time?"
Roger shook his head. "Dominick wasn't with me at all. And Linda was kind enough to give me some privacy while I took a leak. But if we go in there and raise hell over a jack-in-the-box, we're going to look really stupid."
"I never intended to raise hell," I said. "We'd just walk back inside and ask who left it. No big deal."
"I say we knock the stupid thing off your car with a stick and then get out of here," Roger suggested. "If the killer did leave it, he wouldn't have been stupid enough to let himself be seen going outside with it, and if we ask too many questions about it we're going to blow the whole reporter setup."
"You're right," I agreed. "But I don't think we should throw it away. It could be an important clue."
"Well, sure, when knives shoot through the sides at us, that'll be an importantclue leading us to conclude that it was a trap!"
"Roger, it's a jack-in-the-box! A toy! Nobody knew we were coming! Who the hell keeps explosive knife-shooting jack-in-the-boxes around?"
"Who the hell buries people alive?"
"Okay, look," I said calmly. "It's there for a reason. If our friend wanted us dead, he would have stabbed us to death right after he murdered Jennifer. He would not leave a trap on our car. It's impractical. And unless everyone in Ghoulish Delights is in on it, having us die right outside of the house would immediately get him questioned by the police!"
"Everyonecouldbe in on it," said Roger. "They were all pretty scary. That Farley lunatic enjoys his work a little too much, if you ask me."
"Now you're just being ridiculous," I said. "At the very least we need to quit standing around debating this and get out of sight in case somebody comes out to ask us what we're doing. Get in the car. I'll grab the box."
"You're actually going to touch it?"
"Yes."
"Idiot."
"Oh, shut up." I reached for the box...but then hesitated at the last moment. Damn that Roger. Now I was scared to touch a children's toy. The stupid thing couldn't be a trap. There were so many better ways to get rid of us.
"Gee, Andrew, why are you pausing?"
"I told you to get in the car and shut up." I took a deep breath, and slowly extended my index finger toward the box. I made contact, and then pulled back as if I'd just touched a hot stove.
"Something wrong?" asked Roger.
"No, you've got me all freaked out." I forced myself to pick up the jack-in-the-box with both hands, revealing a small piece of paper underneath. Written in blood-red letters were the words "Badgraverobbers !"
This was not good.
I tucked the jack-in-the-box under my arm, picked up the note, and then got in the car. I handed the note to Roger as I set the box in the back seat.
"Oh, piss," said Roger.
"Yep.So, either the killer followed us here, or it's somebody inside."
"Or somebody else could know."
"Right, that too." I started the engine. "We need to find out what's in this box."
"Screw that. I say we take it to the police, let them check it out."
"Roger, are you using your brain on a time-share program?" I asked as I backed out onto the road. "Did you forget that the whole reasonwehaven't gone to the police is that we got into this mess by agreeing to dig up a corpse in the boondocks?"