Gravity Dreams

Instead of being charming or persuasive, I reached down and out and lifted her off the bench and into my arms. For a moment, she stiffened, but I didn't press beyond a gentle hug, and she finally hugged me for a moment before stepping back and looking straight into my eyes. You could have anyone, but I won't share you.'

I nodded. I'd understood that long before she'd said a word. 'Let's find a cart.'

There were two waiting, but the driver in the first nodded to us, his eyes on my pilot's greens.

'The marsh lounge ...' I offered.

'It will have to be the main lounge,' Cerrelle corrected me. 'They're repairing the marsh lounge - or expanding it... or something.'

The cart driver looked back at me.

'Main lounge.'

Yes, ser.'

After I helped seat Cerrelle and eased in beside her, she leaned next to me and whispered, except it was more of a subvocalization that only I - or another pilot - could have caught. Yes, ser ... yes, ser ... that's the way it will be from now on, Tyndel. Don't let it go to your head.'

You won't let it.'

'Oh ... I will. I won't say a word. I'll just leave.' You just got here - or I did.'

'You know exactly what I mean.'

'That's what I mean about being honest' I grinned at her, still worried about the pallor that dominated her face. 'Later,' she said, looking at the driver in the front seat. 'Promise?'

'I promise.'

Cerrelle didn't lean on me as we walked into the lounge, but she did take my arm, and I could sense that she was unsteady. What had it been about Thesalle that had created such a problem? And where else had I heard about the place? On OE Station ... Thesalle was the place that had an effect that no one could quantify. More than half the tables were taken, but there was one in the near corner, and we eased toward it.

'... must be one of the newer Web jockeys ...'

'... has to be older ... she's attractive ... but not a raving beauty ...'

'... new jockeys have 'em hanging on them ...' I tried not to flush.

'You see, Tyndel. By choosing me, you've aged yourself.' Cerrelle smiled, but the expression was forced.

'I was already aged, and I've always looked beyond the obvious to what counts. You count.' I held my arm so she could use it to sit. 'What would you like?'

'I can get it. I'm not helpless.'

'Humor me,' I suggested.

Her smile was halfway between irony and relief. 'Any kind of pasta that's not Dhurr-spiced ... with meat of some sort. Cerise ... no ... a pale ale of some sort.'

I bowed my head. 'Your wish ...'

'... is not a command, Tyndel. Get the pasta.'

I got her pasta and ale, and then returned for my own orange beef with saffron rice, and Arleen tea.

'How long before you go out again?' she asked after several mouthfuls.

'Three weeks ... I'm supposed to spend half of every day of the last two before I leave training with Tomas.' I paused. 'What about you?'

'Four weeks' convalescent leave - that's what's left.'

I studied her with every sense I had. 'You've been in medical. When did you get out?'

'This morning.'

You're not supposed to be out.'

'Aleyaisha bent the rules for me ...'

'If you took it easy?'

The nod came hard to my redhead.

Are you sure she wants to be yours? 'What's wrong?'

'Something about the nanite balance ... Thesalle upsets it for some. They don't know why. If you want more details, I'll tell you later. Tell me about your trip.' She took another mouthful of the pasta.

'Are you sure?'

'Humor me, this time.'

We both smiled.

By the time I finished recounting my trip and eating my own orange beef, she had pushed her plate away, leaving about half of the pasta and trying to stifle a yawn. She looked more pale even than earlier.

You need some rest.'

'I do need to go home,' she confessed.

'Not by yourself.'

'I can manage.'

Aleyaisha told you that if I wouldn't help you, you had to go back to medical' I smiled.

You're getting too perceptive,' she grumbled. 'I'm only asking for help getting home. That's all'

'For now,' I agreed.

'For a while,' she countered.

I didn't want to argue, and she was in no shape for much besides rest. I had to wonder just what had happened to her, but I'd asked twice, and she was clearly not going to tell me until she was ready - as usual. Still ... most demons were resistant to just about anything, and she didn't seem to have any overt physical trauma.

'Home' was a great deal farther away than I realized. First came the tunnel glider to Lyncol, and then the free glider-cat I had to steer along a winding path for kilos out of Lyncol until we reached a lake, its ice-and-snow-covered surface shimmering under the full winter moon. The snow was depressed by the pressure of a single set of glider prints, partly drifted in.

'There.' Cerrelle pointed to a chaletlike structure jutting out of a rock outcropping and overlooking the iced-in lake. Below the chalet was a long slope down to the lake itself, a stretch clear of pines that might have been a lawn - at least in summer.

I eased the glider-cat along the edge of the lake through the unbroken snow that covered what had possibly been an old road, and then up to the chalet. A glider door in the side of the chalet slid open as we neared.

'You never told me ... It's impressive.'

'This is my one luxury. I didn't want to ... not until after you made your first insertion. I've seen it happen. Pilots change. Not all of them, but some do.'

'And me?'

'You seem about as hardheaded and obstinate as ever.'

We laughed as I eased the glider into the low-ceilinged hangar. The lights came on, and the door closed behind us even before I could open the canopy.

Cerrelle staggered.

'You shouldn't...' I caught her and half carried her up two flights of stairs to the bedroom, still trying to determine how much help she needed and where help turned into imposition and intrusion. On the way, I took in the smooth polished woods and the openness of the main floor, and the sparseness - a deliberate austerity, I knew.

The lights followed us, and I could sense the link to Cerrelle.

As I stepped into the bedroom, Cerrelle stiffened. 'I can get into bed. Go get me something to drink. There's a formulator down in the kitchen ... a drink menu ... the green tea ... tastes bitter, but it should help.'

After easing her into a sitting position, I slipped back down the steps to puzzle out the kitchen. By the time I returned with the tea, she was stretched out under a deep blue comforter, propped up with two pillows, looking through the glass wall at the silent white expanse of the lake.

She took the tea, and the lights flicked off, leaving us in the darkness. A single light twinkled in the darkness beyond the wide window overlooking the snow-covered slope that led down to the lake. 'Feels better lying down.'

I pulled a chair next to the bed and took a sip of the green tea - not so good as Arleen, but soothing. 'What's Thesalle like?' Perhaps she would tell me without my prying too overtly.

'It's beautiful, shifting shades of green, even at night, and the air is perfumed.' She paused for some tea.

'It doesn't sound dangerous.' I paused. 'When I was on OE Station, there were some scientists - or controllers -talking about it ... how they couldn't quantify something, an unknown hallucinogen ...'

'I don't know about that. I felt off balance the whole time, and it just got worse when I got back.'

'Do they know why?'

'My nanite balance got disrupted.' She shrugged, almost resigned. Aleyaisha says it happens to some Rykashans, but they don't know why.'