"Okay."
"I also knew I couldn't stay. I couldn't be around you - not knowing that what I felt for you would never be returned. I was unwilling to become a martyr... for my sake as well as yours. Unrequited love is one thing - twisting a knife in it day after day wasn't something I was prepared to live with. And by leaving, I could pretend that we were still best friends - that my falling in love with you hadn't changed things between us."
When the silence dragged on, Charisma spoke. "So you were running away this time because...."
"I really wasn't sure how you were going to react. And while I didn't expect violence, I thought you might need some time and space to process," waving her hand around, "all this."
"I'm sure I will need some time and space to process all this, as you put it. But I'd rather you didn't run away from me again... ever. We'll get through this, Brianna Brianna. I have faith."
Brianna nodded. "I hope so... because I missed having you in my life." She reached forward and closed her album, pulling it into her lap and folding her hands on top of it. "However, I'm going to go now, and give you a chance to think about all this and the differences it will make in your life and your way of thinking. I know we still have to finish going through our albums, and we have a lot of other things to talk about besides. But first I think you could probably use a little time to ponder things. I'll still be around if and when you're ready to talk, and you know where to find me." Brianna rose from her seat and Charisma did the same.
"Are you sure?" biting her lip.
"Aren't you?" smiling wistfully when Charisma's head bobbed her acknowledgement slowly. "All right, then - let me go grab my stuff from upstairs, and I'll get out of your hair."
"I really liked having you here, Bri - it was like old times."
"Yes, it was - I enjoyed being here. Maybe we can do it again sometime."
"I'd like that a lot," Charisma replied before she could censor her words. Brianna disappeared upstairs before Charisma could become embarrassed, and slipped back downstairs almost immediately. "That was quick."
"Practice." She paused a moment, then resumed her speech. "Listen, there's one more thing you should know right now - it's going to be the only way you'll be able to figure things out completely." Brianna put her hand on the doorknob, praying Jas had been nearby when she called and she wouldn't have too wait too long for her arrival. "I do love you, Charisma - I think I always will. But I'm not a home wrecker. So if you decide that we can make this friendship work again, I'll need to talk to Kent. I won't give him a reason to misunderstand our friendship because of my love for you."
Charisma would have answered - if she could have gotten words past her suddenly closed throat. And if she'd had *any* idea what sort of response to make to Brianna's declaration. Or if Brianna hadn't escaped from her home as soon as the words were out of her mouth.
Charisma stood stunned for a few moments, hand at her throat as though trying to ease the pressure enough to draw a deep breath. When she realized Brianna was no longer in the room, Charisma shook her head and yanked the door open....
... only to see taillights at the end of her driveway as Jas readied to pull the car onto the road. Another moment and they were gone. Charisma took a deep breath and closed the door. Maybe it was time to talk to Mama.
************
"So did she call Okasa?" Esmeralda asked Indi some time later. They were all scattered around the living room, though Indigo and Opal had been holding court for quite a bit as she recounted their afternoon watching Charisma and Brianna.
"No... at least not in the remaining time that I was with her. When Brianna left with Jas, Charisma stayed leaned up against the door for a few minutes muttering to herself. When she finally straightened, she walked back into the study and resumed her place on the couch, glaring at the album like it had caused the situation. Honestly, Es... I would have laughed if things weren't as serious as they are." She shrugged. "As it is, she was making me a little seasick."
Esmeralda frowned. "How so?"
"I have a question first," waiting for Esmeralda to signal her to go ahead. "Is Charisma a paranoid schizophrenic or multiple personality?"
Esmeralda blinked so rapidly Indi expected her to take flight. A glance at Opal showed she was plainly shocked by the question by the way her jaw swung unhinged. Esmeralda shook her head. "No, Indi... not at all. Why do you ask?"
"Because," Indi sighed deeply, "her actions this afternoon were beyond what I'd consider reasonable."
"Okay. What did she do that you consider unreasonable?"
"She was like a mad woman, Es. First she cried a little and then she smiled and hugged the album to her like it was a precious child. Then she cried some more and then she got angry - not the good kind of angry either. Then she cried some more and looked through her pictures with that odd little sentimental smile on her face - you know the kind I'm talking about. Then she got mad again, and this time instead of muttering invectives, she paced and ranted and clenched her fists. Then she sat down and cried - and this time the crying was a deluge."
"And after that?" Opal finally asked when the silence had gone on too long for her comfort. She looked around and saw everyone staring at her as though she'd lost her marbles... everyone except for Esmeralda. She nodded her approval of Opal's question, and relieved, Opal turned back to Indi, waiting for an answer. Indi gave her a half-smile.
"How did you know?"
"Because I know Charisma. She may rant and rave and act like a lunatic by herself for a little while in the privacy of her own home - let's face it... we all have to vent from time to time. But she is far too much of a control freak to let anyone or anything wrest that control from her for very long. If she had a good, long cry, she got the release she needed. Even if the situation hasn't been dealt with, she's under control again, and things can move forward."
Esmeralda nodded her approval of Opal's summation. "I agree. A lot of the outcome will depend on how true her words to Brianna were. Because let's face it - Brianna was correct when she told Charisma that the knowledge would change how Charisma thought of Brianna as a person and how she perceived their relationship... even one of friendship."
"Yeah, but I really admire Brianna's tenacity. She didn't back down and she didn't take the easy road out by glossing over things or leaving things unsaid. She laid it all on the line."
"I don't think Charisma expected that," Opal replied to Indi's observation though she was looking at Esmeralda when she said it. Esmeralda cocked her head in a listening attitude and waited for Opal to continue. "I got the impression she figured she'd get an answer to her first question - when she asked Brianna if she left all those years ago because she loved her. Brianna promised to tell her the truth if and when she ever actually asked the right question, and as far as I can tell - except for saying goodbye - Brianna has never broken a promise to Charisma. But she seemed completely overwhelmed by the thoroughness of Brianna's response."
"Could she have done the same?" The question caused all eyes to swing in Saphira's direction. Saphira shrugged. "What??" looking around the room. "It seems like a fair question."
"It is a fair question. I don't think she could," Esmeralda stated quietly. "Given what we know of her history and behavior, probably not... even now."
"So she'll prove Brianna right?"
"I didn't say that," Esmeralda replied to the anguish in Saphira's voice as much as her words. "Charisma has grown and changed in the years they've been apart just like Brianna has. The difference is she has only half-lived - a large part of herself missing and hidden away because she refuses to see what she knows is true."