.. Ah! no more of that!.. that he was going to go into business, too.. into the hustling racket!.. that with times as they were he’d make a pile in no time! Boy, and how! that he’d already taken up the big matter with Cascade about a little sister!. that he’d mentioned it to him. that he had more than enough to treat himself to one. That he hadn’t said yes or no. Not too bad-looking a one who made out all right..
"You’re going to be kind of short for a pimp!. You’ll hide under the bed! ”
I couldn’t keep from saying it.
"Short! Short! ” he exclaims.. "Listen, you cluck! Can’t I have a piece like anyone else? Ah! Gravy! Greetings! There’s a war on! ”
Ah! he was dead set on it!
"Tail, that’s the business!”
Besides there were going to be widows!.. That was understood, too.. Cascade had spoken to him about it… He was counting on it. A widow!. maybe two!. bargains!.. There’d never been such a boom… it was really the perfect business!.. Whore galore!.. velvet!
A nasty little stinker!
So gabbing away like that we came to the Mall, the big avenue in front of the Palace.. Buckingham Palace… a fine bridle path. We sat down there on a bench. under a tree… I feel like letting some people go by… to look at them..
"You see?” he says. "That’s where the king is!”
I still remember his remark.
"It’s not as nice as the Louvre! ” I answer.
"That’s a matter of taste, their kings liked it!.. London’s not Paris! ”
We argue about it awhile.
"Our kings had a swell setup too.. Say, I’ve seen the Louvre!”
But I stuck to the Louvre! he’d never convince me!
"'Listen I know something about it! ”
I start going into detail.
"Ah! and what paintings! millions of them in a row!” "What was the name of our last one?”
He asks me a question. I never remember!
"Louis the Sixteenth! ”
What the hell.
"You’re educated, pal!” he answers back, but that immediately annoys him.
"Remember, education’s not everything! the thing that counts in life, see, is natural intelligence!.. And I’ve got it! I can flatter myself about that! That’s the main thing! I’ve known women who knew five and six languages! I wouldn’t have wanted them as kitchenmaids!. stuck up! that’s all!. Swell-headed!. Just look at the suckers. They’re often educated, eh?..You never saw anything so dopey!. proof!.. You ought to see the way they pass their time in the clubs!.. I can tell you about that!. They play! they lose! and I win!
.. My boy, the hell with them I tell you!.. What does a king do for a good time?. ‘I’m a-off to war!’ he announces. 'I’ll be right back!. The other guys are getting killed for me!’. He gets there around noon!. He has a swell lunch in his tent stuck in the back of the woods.. He’s in the lines!.. the photographers come along! They take a photo of the guy! on a horse! in a car! and I go home!..Nice chap! Greetings, ladies and gentlemen! Ah! nice majesty! Badaboom! a hundred and three canon shots! We’ve won! You see him in all the magazines!. like you, pal! Hurrah! and God Save the King!. You think the King worries?. I’ve always known. It’s natural! They got life too soft!. I’d take it easy, too! in his place!. You, too!. If you were spoiled like them!.. You’d just fiddle around, it’s only natural! if you were king!
You just lap it up, can’t help it!”
He was doing all the talking. I wasn’t saying anything
.. Suddenly he asks me, "Say, d’you know Big Fatso?.. Ever heard him give out at Cascade’s?. . If I Were King!. He sure knows how to sing it! ”
I’d stopped listening to him. he was wearing me out.. I was feeling pooped again.. especially my head.. What excitement in the last two weeks!. In my state it was murderous..
"Ferdinand, you’re not staying here?. You said you were coming!. Aren’t you? Come along!”
That was right after all.
"Come on! Let’s go!. We’ll take the Tube! You’re too tired, you’re groggy! ”
That was quite true.
"You see?”.. he points to the lawns in the distance. "the sparrows are happy… for them it’s the feed bag everywhere.. it’s the berries everywhere!.. That’s the sparrow’s life!
.. You see the advantage!. Say, you know I like birds!.. I’d have a big bird-cage if I had the dough! like at the zoo! Have you seen the one here? Cocatoos! the rainbow! all colors!
It’s beautiful! It’s more beautiful than the paintings in your Louvre!.. real rainbows!.. hurry up!.. They’ll be gone!.. We’ll have to drop in at the Ping-Pong.”
"You think so?” I ask him again. "You really think it's serious?.. that I ought to go back to the Leicester?.. Maybe it’s better not to see them again?”
"Ah! be careful, Ferdinand!. You know Cascade, he’s a decent guy!.. But if he sees that you’re giving him a runaround!.. that you’re afraid of explaining things!.. Ah! he’ll really think there’s something fishy about you! Ah! there’ll be hell to pay!.. Ah! he’ll get pretty mean! Boro won’t have any trouble filling him with his hokum! Ah! they’ll step all over you! Since you’re not there!”
He was set on my making up my mind… on our taking the Tube. both of us. he insisted terrifically. Ah! he’s working on me, he’s making me groggy.. right there in front of the station I was still hesitating..
"Oh! ” I say.. "Ten-paw, I’m not going! ”
I changed my mind.
"You’re making a mistake Ferdinand!. You’re making a mistake! ’’
Ah! it griped him that I’d said no!.. I saw his stubborn little mug… I gave in a little… I took two or three steps..
I stopped.. People were looking at us on the sidewalk… at the midget, the two of us arguing… I entered the station.. He didn’t let me catch my breath… He rushed to the ticket window..
"Come on, Ferdinand!.. Let’s go!.. Here’s your chance!
It’s better to go!. Afterwards you’ll be glad!. Stop worrying!.. Shake a leg! ”
I follow him… I go along. I’m giving in because I’m tired, that’s the truth… It was the Baker Street station… He gets the tickets… We’re pushed into the elevator.. smothered in the rush. suddenly I feel anxious!. My heart had been racing away since the night before.. the morning. since Greenwich, in fact.. now it’s charging! Cooped up that way in the elevator! I’m palpitating! palpitating! an awful burst!
"Listen, midget!” I say. "Listen, are you really sure?”
It’s going down. down..
"Don’t be silly, Ferdinand!.. Don’t be silly.. All you’ve got to do is explain!.. If you don’t go, they’ll believe everything!.. you don’t realize what can happen! ”
Squeezed together like that in the coop! We come right out on to the platform.. he’s still holding me by the arm.
"Mustn’t get lost!” he says. "Mustn’t get lost!”
So there we are waiting for the train.. squeezed among the people. I don’t know why. they’re all stifling me!.. I can’t breathe any more!. They’re all there against me! I free myself. Ah! I free myself. I take three steps forward to the edge of the track.. And there opposite? who do I see? who’s that there?. there facing me?. Ah! excuse me! Ah! my eyes pop!.. His raglan!.. His soft felt!.. His mug!.. It’s Matthew! Matthew! there on the other platform!. Matthew looking straight at us!.. My blood turns!.. I stop breathing!.. I stop moving!.. I stand there hypnotized… he looks at me!.. I look at him! Ah! but I’m thinking!.. I’m thinking fast!.. It’s the midget! there against me!.. It’s him!.. It’s the double-crosser!. "Good!. Good!. Good!”.. It’s getting ready by itself!. my scheme. I concentrate. concentrate.. Not a word. calm and collected.. People are talking all around us.. They’re waiting for the train like us.. We hear the train roaring. it’s coming!. there in the darkness. in the hole. at my right. Good!. Good!.. Good!