8
No Exit
“I’M not discussing anything with you until I get my memories back,” I said through gritted teeth. “They weren’t yours to take and there are things I need to remember.”
“I didn’t take away your memories, Beth,” Jake scoffed. “Though it’s flattering you think I’m powerful enough to do so. I may have buried them temporarily but dig deep and you’ll find them. Personally, I’d let it go, make a fresh start.”
“Will you show me how? I can’t do it by myself.”
“Give me one good reason why I should.” Jake rocked back in his chair and pouted. “I’m sure you’ll only twist things to make me look bad.”
“I’m serious, enough with the games!”
“Bethany, has it occurred to you that maybe I’m doing this for your own good? Maybe you’re better off this way.”
“Jake, please,” I said softly. “I’m not the same person anymore. I don’t recognize myself. What’s the point of having me here if I don’t even know who I am?”
Jake gave an exaggerated sigh as if my request were a huge imposition.
“Oh, very well.” In a single fluid movement he crossed the room to where I was standing. “Let me see what I can do.”
Jake pressed two cool fingers lightly against my right temple. And that was it. The repressed memories cascaded like an avalanche. I had to reach out and steady myself by holding on to the edge of the table. I still remembered my peaceful life at Byron, but now the missing pieces of the puzzle were back. I remembered the core and center from which everything else stemmed. I saw the night of the Halloween party, only this time I wasn’t alone. Someone with dazzling blue eyes, honeystreaked hair, and a smile so disarming it made me weak at the knees was by my side. Remembering Xavier’s face caused an indescribable rush of happiness to surge through me.
But it was short lived. Seconds later another memory savagely blotted out the first. I saw Xavier’s crumpled figure lying on the dusty road while a motorbike sped away into the darkness. The memory made me so heartsick I wished I could give it back and force it out of my mind. My whole body now ached with the pain of our separation and the sight of his lifeless form. I couldn’t live with the knowledge that he might be gone. If I knew that Xavier was alive and well, I could even bear my exile to this God-forsaken wasteland. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to muster the will to survive. I realized at that moment that, wise or foolhardy, all of my happiness came from one single source. If that source was cut off, I wouldn’t be able to function; I wouldn’t want to.
“Xavier,” I breathed. I felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. Why was it so stifling in here? The image couldn’t be dislodged. “Please tell me he’s all right.”
Jake rolled his eyes. “Typical. I should have known your thoughts would go straight to him.”
I was choking back tears. “Wasn’t it enough to abduct me? How dare you hurt him! You’re a vicious, heartless coward.” Rage suddenly replaced my distress. My hands curled into fists and began beating at Jake’s chest. He didn’t try to stop me but simply waited for the anger to subside.
“Feel better now?” he asked. I didn’t feel better, but I did feel a tiny sense of release. “Let’s dispense with the melodrama,” he said. “Pretty boy isn’t dead — just a little worse for wear.”
“What?” My head jerked up.
“The impact didn’t kill him,” Jake said. “It just knocked him out.”
The relief I felt was resuscitating. I sent a silent prayer to whatever higher power had spared him. Xavier was alive! He was breathing and walking the earth, perhaps just a little more bruised than when I last saw him.
“I suppose things are better this way,” Jake said with a wry smile. “His death might have started things off on the wrong foot between us.”
“Do you promise never to hurt him?” I asked testily.
“Never is a long time. Let just say he’s safe for now.”
I didn’t like the implication behind the words for now, but decided not to push my luck.
“And Ivy and Gabriel are safe?”
“They’re a formidable force together,” he said. “Anyway, they were never part of the plan. I was only interested in getting you here and now that’s done. Although for a while I wasn’t sure I’d be able to pull it off. It’s no easy feat for a demon to drag an angel into hell, you know. I’m not sure it’s ever been done before.” Jake looked pleased with his achievement.
“It sure looked easy to me.”
“Well,” Jake said, smiling indulgently. “I didn’t think I’d be able to rise again after your holier-than-thou brother sent me back down here. But then those silly little friends of yours started summoning spirits right there in Venus Cove! I couldn’t believe my luck.”
Jake’s eyes smoldered like coals. “It wasn’t a very powerful incantation that girl recited. It only awoke some restless spirits, but they were more than happy to trade places.”
“They weren’t trying to summon demons,” I said defensively. “Séances are only supposed to conjure spirits.” I couldn’t shake the feeling of responsibility. I had chosen to turn a blind eye when I should have done more to stop them, including smashing the board into tiny pieces and throwing it out the window.
“It’s more of a lucky strike really,” Jake said. “Who knows what you’ll pull out of the ground.” I glowered at him darkly. “Don’t look at me like that, it’s not entirely my fault. I couldn’t have brought you here if you hadn’t accepted my invitation.”
“What invitation?” I said sarcastically. “I don’t remember you asking if I wanted a pit stop in Hell.”
“I offered you a ride and you accepted,” Jake said smugly.
“That doesn’t count, I was tricked — I thought you were someone else!”
“Too bad. Rules are rules. Besides, how naïve can you be? Didn’t it strike you as a teeny bit odd that Mr. Responsible would dive-bomb from a tree into a river? Did you really think he’d ditch you to play frat-boy pranks? Even I didn’t think you’d fall for that. You of all people should have known better, but it only took a second to break your faith in him. You sealed your own fate by accepting that ride. It hardly had anything to do with me at all.”
His words hit me like blows. As the realization of my own stupidity sank in, Jake began to laugh. I’d never heard anyone laugh in such an empty, hollow way. He reached out and grasped my hands in his.
“Don’t worry, Beth. I’m not going to let one little mistake change my opinion of you.”
“Let me go home,” I pleaded. Somewhere in the recesses of his mind I hoped there lingered a vestige of decency that would allow him to feel a hint of remorse, a tinge of guilt, anything I could beg or bargain with. But I couldn’t have been more wrong.
“You are home,” Jake said in a flat voice. He pressed my hands to his chest. His flesh felt as malleable as dough, and for an awful second I thought my fingers would sink right into the hollow cavity where his heart should have been.
“I’m sorry I can’t be human for you,” he drawled. “But you have a few irregularities of your own, so I don’t think you can sit in judgment.” He released one of my hands, allowing his fingers to hover over my retracted wings.
“At least I have a heart, which is more than I can say for you,” I said. “It’s no wonder you don’t feel anything.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. You make me feel things, Beth. That’s why you have to stay. Hell’s a whole lot brighter with you in it.”