Whimpering, he put his thumb in his mouth and began to suck.
CHAPTER TWENTY
For Abby, mornings were the worst. She would awaken feeling that first sleepy flush of anticipation for the day ahead. Then suddenly she'd remember: I have nowhere to go. That realization would strike as cruelly as any physical blow. She would lie in bed, listening to Mark getting dressed. She'd hear him moving around in the still-dark bedroom, and she would feel so engulfed by depression she could not say a word to him. They shared a house and a bed, yet they'd scarcely spoken to each other in days. This is how love dies, thought Abby, hearing him walk out the front door. Not with angry words, but with silence.
WhenAbby was twelve years old, her father was laid off from his job at the tannery. For weeks afterwards, he'd drive away each morning, as though heading for work as usual. Abby never found out where he went, or what he did. Till the day he died, he never told her. All Abby knew was that her father was terrified of staying home and confronting his own failure. So he'd continued the charade, fleeing the house every morning.
Just as Abby was doing today.
She left the car at home and walked instead, blocks and blocks, not really caring where she went. Last night the weather had turned cold, and by the time she finally stopped in at a bagel shop, her face was numb. She bought coffee and a sesame seed bagel and slid into one of the booths. She'd taken only two bites when she happened to glance at the man at the next table. He was reading a Boston Herald.
Abby's photo was on the front page.
She felt like crawling out the door. Furtively she glanced around the care, half expecting everyone to be looking at her, but no one was.
She bolted out of the booth, tossed her bagel in the trash, and walked out. Her appetite was gone. At a newsstand a block away, she purchased a copy of the Herald and huddled, shivering in a doorway while she scanned the article.
RIGORS OF SURGICAL TRAINING MAY HAVE LED
TO TRAGEDY
By all accounts, Dr. Abigail DiMatteo was an outstanding resident — one of the best at Bayside Medical Centre, according to Department Chairman Dr. Colin Wettig. But sometime in the last few months, soon after Dr. DiMatteo entered her second year in the programme, things began to go terribly wrong…
Abby had to stop reading; her breaths were coming too hard and fast. It took her a few moments to calm down enough to finish the article. When she finally did, she felt truly sick.
The reporter had included everything. The lawsuits. Mary Allen's death. The shouting match with Brenda. None of it was deniable. All the elements, taken together, painted the picture of an unstable, even dangerous personality. It fed right into the public's secret horror of being at the mercy of a deranged physician.
I can't believe it's me they're writing about.
Even if she managed to retain her medical licence, even if she finished a residency, an article like this would follow her forever. So would the doubts. No patient in his right mind would go under the knife of a psychopath.
She didn't know how long she walked around with that newspaper clutched in her hand. When she finally came to a halt, she was standing on the Harvard University Common, and her ears were aching from the cold. She realized it was already well past lunchtime. She'd been walking around all morning, and now half the day was gone. She didn't know where to go next. Everyone else on the Common — students in backpacks, shaggy professors in tweeds — seemed to have a destination. But not her.
She looked down again, at the newspaper. The photograph they'd used of her was from the residency directory, a shot taken when she was an intern. She'd smiled straight at the camera, her face fresh and eager, the look of a young woman ready and willing to work for her dream.
She threw the newspaper into the nearest trash receptacle and walked home, thinking: Fight back. I have to fight back.
But she and Vivian had run out of leads. Yesterday, Vivian had flown to Burlington. When she'd called Abby last night, it had been with bad news: Tim Nicholls's practice had closed down, and no one knew where he was. Dead end. Also, Wilcox Memorial had no records of any harvests on those four dates. Another dead end. Finally, Vivian had checked with the local police and had found no records of missing persons or unidentified bodies with their hearts cut out. Final dead end.
They've covered their tracks. [Ve'll never beat them.
As soon as she stepped in the front door, she saw the answering machine was blinking. It was a message from Vivian to call back. She'd left a Burlington number. Abby dialled the number, but got no answer, so she hung up.
Next she called NEOB, but as usual, they wouldn't put her through to Helen Lewis. No one, it seemed, wanted to hear the latest theories of the psychopathic Dr. DiMatteo. She didn't know who else to call. She ran through the list of all the people she knew at Bayside. Dr. Wettig. Mark. Mohandas and Zwick. Susan Casado. Jeremiah Parr. She didn't trust any of them. Any of them.
She'd just picked up the phone to try calling Vivian again when she happened to glance out of the window. Parked at the far end of the street was a maroon van.
You bastard. This time you're mind She ran to the hall closet and pulled out the binoculars. Focusing from the window, she could just make out the licence plate.
I got you, she thought in triumph. I got you.
She grabbed the phone and dialled Katzka. It struck her then, as she was waiting for him to come on the line, how strange it was that he should be the one she'd call. Maybe it was an automatic response. You need help, you call a cop. And he was the only cop she knew.
"Detective Katzka," he said in his usual flat and businesslike voice. "The van is back!" she blurted. "Excuse me?"
"This is Abby DiMatteo. The van that was following me — it's parked right outside my house. The licence number's 539TDV. Massachusetts plate."
There was a pause as he wrote it down. "You live on Brewster Street, right?"
"Yes. Please send someone right away. I don't know what he's going to do."
"Just sit tight and keep the doors locked. Got that?"
"OK." She let out a nervous breath. "OK."
She knew the doors were already locked, but she re-checked them anyway. Everything was secure. She returned to the living room and sat near the curtain, every so often glancing outside to make sure the van was still there. She wanted it to stay right where it was. She wanted to see the driver's reaction when the cops arrived.
HARVEST
Fifteen minutes later, a familiar greenVolvo drove by and pulled over at the kerb, right across the street from the van. She hadn't expected Katzka himself to show up, but there he was, stepping out of his car. At her first glimpse of him, she felt an overwhelming sense of relief. He'll know what to do, she thought. Katzka was clever enough to deal with anything.
He crossed the street and slowly approached the van.
Abby pressed closer to the window, her heart suddenly pounding. She wondered if Katzka's pulse was racing as fast as hers was. He moved with almost casual grace towards the driver's door. Only as he shifted, turning slightly towards Abby, did she notice that he'd drawn his gun. She hadn't even seen him reach for it.
She was almost afraid to watch now. Afraid for him.
He edged forward and glanced in the window. Apparently he saw nothing suspicious. He circled around to the rear of the van and peered through the back window. Then he re-holstered his gun and looked up and down the street.
At a nearby house, the front door suddenly swung open and a man in grey overalls stormed down the porch steps, yelling and waving. Katzka responded with his trademark unflappability and produced his badge. The other man took a look at it and handed it back. Then he took out his wallet and showed hid/s ID.