“Uald,” I whispered. “Where is he?”
“North, with Lord Thorfinn. At the moment, he is allied with your promised husband’s enemies.”
“What should I do?”
“Well, if you ask me, I say you should run off and tell Malcolm to go to hell. You and your druid don’t need the court life.”
“You tempt my heart.”
Uald whistled, capturing Kelpie’s attention. My horse sniffed the wind then trotted over to me. Kelpie stuffed his nostrils in my hair and breathed deeply.
“I missed you too,” I whispered, stroking his neck. I turned back to Uald. “I don’t know what to do.”
“It’s your choice. If you return to court, return as Boite’s daughter and wield your bloodline like a weapon. But never let Cerridwen sink below your skin. Be a raven amongst doves.”
It was then I noticed a young horse moving across the field toward us. “Who is that?” I asked.
“The offspring I told you about. I named him Titan.”
“He’s enormous.”
The horse stopped in front of Uald who scratched his ears. “He’s no bigger than he should be.” Uald looked at me and then frowned. “It is the same with Sid. Corbie, you’ve been gone a long time.”
“Long? How long?”
“Six years.”
“Six years!” Six years was too much. No one could wait that long. Banquo would have given up on me already. I closed my eyes and shook my head. As I did so, I felt a sharp pain shoot across my skull. I stepped away from the fence. My knees grew soft.
“Cerridwen,” Uald said, catching me before I fell.
“It’s too much,” I whispered.
“Come,” Uald said, leading me to her smithy. “I made something for you.”
Once inside, I sat down at the table and held my head in my hands while Uald dug through her trunk. A few moments later, she set a package in front of me.
“Go ahead,” she told me.
Trying to ignore the pain, I slowly unwrapped the bundle. Inside, I found a glimmering sword topped with a raven’s head. It was the most beautiful weapon I’d ever seen.
I gasped. “Did you make this?”
“In many ways, you are the daughter I never had. Take this sword, and wield it as the raven.”
I rose and lifted the blade. My sword arms were weaker than they had been before I’d gone to Ynes Verleath, but I was still strong. Bracing myself, I swished the blade back and forth. Before my eyes, I imagined Duncan’s monstrous face. I envisioned taking his head off. But it didn’t feel like enough. It didn’t feel violent enough. I wanted more blood. I heard my heart beating hard, and in the distance, I perceived the sound of raven’s wings.
“Uald, daughter of Hephaestus,” Madelaine called from behind me. “Isn’t it beautiful? Don’t you just love it?”
I turned and looked at Madelaine.
The expression on Madelaine’s face changed. She looked startled. “Corbie?”
“It is the raven you see,” Uald told her. “Don’t be afraid.”
I lowered the sword, and the sound of wings dissipated. My heartbeat slowed.
“It’s beautiful,” I told Uald.
“I…I was thinking we should get ready to go. Tavis is waiting. It’s been a week. I don’t want to keep Moray waiting longer. They…they think I’ve traveled to the convent for you,” Madelaine said, obviously upset. I wondered then how I looked when the raven took over me.
I lifted the belted scabbard off the table and wrapped it around my waist. Sliding the sword inside, I crossed the smithy and embraced Uald.
“Thank you,” I whispered in her ear. “For everything.”
“If you need anything, we are always here for you.”
I nodded then turned to Madelaine.
“I’ll need to say goodbye to Sid,” I told her.
Madelaine nodded. “She went back to her house. I’ll let Epona know we are planning to leave.”
“I’ll get Kelpie ready. I’m sure he’ll be keen to ride.”
“Thank you, Uald,” I said, setting my hand on her shoulder.
I turned then and crossed the square to Sid’s little house. I knocked lightly on the door.
“Come,” she called. She was already packing up my old things. “We stored your belongings here,” Sid said. “I looked after them.”
I nodded then sat down on Sid’s bed. I gently touched the hem of one of my old dresses. So much life had passed. Six years. How had that happened? I sighed heavily.
“That sigh says a lot of things,” Sid commented. “I’d sigh too if I had to get married.”
“And to the wrong man, nonetheless.”
“You are lucky to have so many to choose from.”
“Am I? Soon I’ll be in Moray counting bricks on the wall.”
“You will be in charge of the women. You can force them to like you.”
“Am I so awful that I need to force people to like me?”
“Yes, but at least you will have the power to do so.”
I smiled. “Be careful or I may just force you to come with me.”
“If only I could. The wrong man, eh?”
“Wrong man. Wrong title. Wrong lands. Wrong, wrong, wrong. So much is wrong here, Sid.”
“One man is as good as another.”
“You don’t really believe that.”
“The only difference from one man to the other is the color of his hair.”
“You have a poor opinion of men.”
Sid stilled then turned and looked at me. “Shouldn’t you?”
I stared at her. Did she know?
“Nadia,” Sid said gently. “The fey saw.”
I felt like someone had wrapped their hands around my throat. Terrible shame swept over me, but then that shame turned to anger. Why should I feel disgraced because of the evil in others? “The fey should not gossip other’s sorrows.”
“It was not gossip. They were afraid for you. They have foreseen…life springing forth in you.”
“Yes.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Take my new husband to bed as soon as I can force myself to do so, give the innocent flowers growing inside me a respectable family name, then avenge myself when the time comes.”
“I have taken that offense more times than I care to say.”
“He will pay.”
“May the Morrigu let it be so,” Sid said then smiled at me. “You will be a mother.”
I nodded as I studied my friend. I remembered what Epona had told me when I first came to the coven, that Sid had a child that lived amongst the fey…or so Epona believed. And worse still, I remember what Epona had said about the child Sid had killed in her madness after being sexually violated. “Sid…” I began, but I didn’t know what to say.
She exhaled deeply then shook her head. “You are stronger than I am. You will be fine.”
“What of your child?” I asked her. “Does your second child live?”
She nodded. “My sweet boy. He’s nearly ten now and more fey than human,” she said then shrugged. “Even in the unexpected, we can find blessings.” She handed me my bag. I heaved it over my shoulder, and we turned and went outside.
Thora ran across the square and joined me.
Madelaine, Epona, and Uald were waiting with the horses, which were already saddled.
Aridmis crossed the coven square and took my hand. “All seems dark now,” she told me, “but the clouds will pass. I’ve seen it in the stars.”
“Thank you, dear sister,” I told her.
Bride, too, waited for me. She handed me a bundle. “Honey cakes. It is a long ride to Moray.”
I kissed her on both cheeks. “Thank you, Mother.”
“I hope I will see you again in this life. If not, I’ll find you in the next,” Bride told me.
I inclined my head to her.