That news hit him like a hammer, making him flinch and blink. The Torrians weren't dead? None of them? How did that happen? He saw the devastation. He had wandered the streets in a daze, and he was certain he saw nobody milling around out in the firestorm.
No, you saw no one before, because they were still being protected, the Goddess said delicately. The fire had to be extinguished before they could be released.
The relief that suddenly flowed through him was too unbelievably overwhelming for mere words to describe. A sigh that summed up his entire feeling about the matter escaped him, and he flopped back down onto the ash, putting the back of his paw over his eyes. "How did it happen?" he managed to ask.
That is not your concern, kitten, the Goddess told him primly. And I'm not going to tell you. But I do want to tell you that this kind of intervention does not come easily, nor will it happen again. Remember that the next time you decide to burn down a city.
Her tone made it sound like she was terribly displeased with him, and it made his entire being shiver. Ways to make it up to her, redeem himself in her eyes, the only eyes that mattered to him, began to fly through him like dust in a tornado.
Calmly, my kitten, she soothed. I'm not angry with you at all. In fact, I'm quite proud of you for what you did here tonight.
" Proud?" he gasped, sitting straight up in an instant.
Of course I'm proud, she replied easily. You were forced to make a terrible decision. To weigh your own feelings and needs against the cruel burden of necessity. But despite knowing what it would cost you, you chose to protect me rather than succumb to your desperate desire not to carry through with it. You were willing to sacrifice everything for me, kitten. You were willing to do something that every fiber of your being cried for you not to do. Don't you understand how that makes me feel? How proud I am of you, how much it makes you special to me?
He couldn't say anything. He only closed his eyes and bowed his head. "The Dals?"
All who called you enemy are dead, she told him fiercely. They were not protected from your wrath. I know even that will weigh on you, but remember who they were and what they were trying to do. And remember how the Cat feels about enemies.
"Dead enemies are the best enemies," he said immediately. She was right, the deaths of so many did concern him, make him feel somewhat guilty, but they had all been enemies. Enemies meant nothing to him after they were dead. He felt unsure as to how killing so many would affect him, but he knew right then and there that he had no moral compunction to punish himself for killing Dals and ki'zadun. They were trying to kill him, kill his daughter, kill his Goddess, and that made them not worth a moment's concern.
And then again, there was the destruction of Torrian. If all the citizens were indeed alive, then they had less than nothing. Not even clothes. Tarrin's spell had utterly devastated the entire city, leaving nothing but ash in its wake. He looked over to the three humans, where the female had finally gotten over her bout of modesty to help the male pull the child out from under the blackened post. They had nothing. No home, no possessions, no food, not even clothes. He had deprived them of everything but their lives.
Tarrin somehow struggled to his feet and stumbled over towards them in a discordant gait. They gasped and shrank back from him when they realized he was there, saw him as they leaned over their backs to look at the child. It looked like a female child, about ten or so, with her legs pinned under a short, blocky stone post that was blackened from the fire. He reached down without a word and grabbed that stone, then struggled as he picked it up enough for the little girl to squirm her way free. Once she was out, he dropped the stone immediately and dropped to one knee, panting from the exertion of it. Had he been whole, he could have picked up that stone with one paw and thrown it a good ten spans. The little girl, a cute little female with blond hair and blue eyes and adorable cheeks that reminded him of his own daughter, stared up at him in innocent wonder.
"Th-Thank you, your honor," the man said in an uncertain voice. "I couldn't lift it."
"I almost couldn't," he said with a wheeze. "How did you come to be here, goodman?" Tarrin asked the male, looking up at him.
"Well, your honor, I can't rightly remember," he admitted. "The last thing I recall before waking up naked in this was hiding in our bedroom as the men quartered in our house ran out. Can you tell us what in the blazes happened?"
"The short of it is that the Dals were destroyed," Tarrin said. "Unfortunately, they took the city with them."
"It was worth it to get those damned stoneheads off our land," the man spat.
Tarrin glanced at the male, seeing his nudity. Were he rested, he could have Conjured the man some clothes, but to even try in the state he was in would be fatal, and he knew it. If he couldn't find the strength to stand, then there was no way he could handle using Druidic magic. But somehow, he did manage to get back to his feet, though his knees trembled and threatened to unlock at any moment.
"Something like that," he told her, standing fully erect despite the fact that he didn't have the energy to remain so very long, and looking out over the blasted wasteland. "The Rangers should be in the city by now," he surmised. "If the fires have stopped all over, and they've seen the survivors, they should be in the city finding them. We need to get you to them."
" Papa!" he heard from behind. Tarrin whirled in time to see Jasana break free from her mother and run towards him. Jesmind rushed up behind her. The turn had unlocked his knees, and he found himself dropping to them on the ground, just in time for Jasana to jump into him and hug him fiercely about the neck. He nuzzled his daughter lovingly, smelling the ash and soot on her, marring her usually wonderful scent, smelling her worry and fear all over her. Jesmind reached him an instant later, putting her paws on his shoulder, on his back, hugging him, then going over him with her paws to make sure he was whole. It was almost amusing, watching her try to inspect, hug, kiss, and glare at him all at the same time. Were he not so tired, he would have laughed.
"What's the matter, papa?" Jasana asked immediately.
"It's alright, cub," he said soothingly. "I'm alright."
"Tarrin, I was so worried," Jesmind said breahtlessly, kissing him repeatedly as she pushed Jasana to one side, leaning against him. "We saw you go back into the fire, and I almost died when I saw the look on your face."
"It's alright now," he said, glancing towards the three humans, who were watching on in surprise. "It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, that's all."
"How did they manage to live through that?" Jesmind demanded. "They could probably see the flames in Aldreth!"
"The-the townsfolk were immune to the spell," he said weakly, uncertain how Jesmind or the Torrians who no doubt were listening would take it if he started talking about how a god talked to him. "It didn't hurt them."
"Why did you do it?" Jesmind asked quickly. "Why? There was a plan!"
"They knew the plan," he said grimly. "And they had many more men here than Arren thought. If I'd have allowed the army to attack the city, they would have been slaughtered. It was the only thing I could do to save the men outside," he sighed forlornly. He looked back to the humans. "We need to-"
"You need to do nothing!" Jesmind shouted at him. "You've done enough tonight, Tarrin Kael! Look at you! You look half dead! Right now, you're coming back with me, and I'm going to give you something to eat, and then you're going to get some rest. And never scare me like this again!" she screamed at him. Then she hugged him fiercely.
That was Jesmind. Didn't give a flip for the men he'd killed or the destruction he'd wrought. Her only concern was him.
"Jesmind-"
"Jesmind nothing!" she snapped, cutting him off. "You're going to obey me, or I'm going to drag your sorry butt back to the camp by your tail!"