Hopeful Monsters

There was a day when Melvyn arrived back unexpectedly from Spain. Or perhaps he had never been to Spain: I thought — Of course, he has just been waiting round some corner so that he can break in on us in bed. We were, in fact, in bed, and making love. Melvyn's eyebrows had become so pointed that they were indeed like those of a devil. He said 'You two! See me in my study after prayers.'

I said 'How was Spain?'

He said 'Very hot, Spain.'

I said 'This is Helena.'

He said 'Darling, you've got the face, but I'd take the thousand ships.'

I thought — The Devil becomes a bore: but he was necessary to do whatever it was in the Garden of Eden?

You said 'How do you do.'

Melvyn said 'Fairly straightforwardly in the morning, ducky.'

I said 'I don't suppose you've even been to Spain!'

He said 'You two were clever to have got out when you did.'

You said 'Why?'

Melvyn said 'Franco's going to win.'

I said 'Whose side are you on at the moment, the Russians or the Germans?'

Melvyn said to you 'Oh but have I heard some stories about you!'

You got out of bed to dress. Melvyn watched you.

He said 'I've always thought that one is given a much easier time by one's enemies than by one's friends.'

I said 'Oh very true.'

When you were dressed you said 'I'll go and look for Bruno.'

I thought — You won't let Melvyn hurt us, will you?

Melvyn said 'I do think Hitler's doing the most tremendous job, you know: getting rid of all those nice clever unmentionables who could help him.'

You said to me 'I'll see you.'

Melvyn said 'Those naughty Aryan boys can't boil a cup of tea!'

I said 'Eleanor's father and mother have disappeared in concentration camps.'

You said to me 'It's all right.'

I thought — The Devil, or Melvyn, must be in some sort of despair -

— He will get us out of our Garden of Eden, to look for Bruno?

Melvyn and I went to a pub. It was a pub where I had sometimes gone with Caroline. I thought — Is there not some weird Middle Eastern sect in which the Devil is considered a saint, for having got Adam and Eve moving on from their Garden of Eden?

Melvyn was saying to whoever would listen to him in the pub — 'Of course Stalin doesn't want the Reds to win the war in Spain. What he wants to do is persecute Trotskyites. He's got his problems at home: he has to say they're caused by Trotskyites. Who cares about Spain? Hitler, too, wants the war to go on: what a chance to try out weapons! And for the rest — oh what an opportunity to act a bit of caring! If you think anyone outside Spain wants the war to

end, you're a child — one who'll end up like one of those orphans of the children's crusade.'

I thought — My angel, take care, will you, how you cross the road: look to left and right; remember, if you want me, perhaps I will know?

Melvyn said 'People with power always want to wipe out heretics rather than infidels: if power is kept pure, then infidels wipe out themselves.'

I said 'So why be in politics at all — that of the Germans or the Russians?'

Melvyn said 'Do you know about this children's crusade? There are a lot of children in Europe left over from Stalin's burning of the heretics, and so they are being sold into slavery in Spain.'

I said 'I was going on a pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela.'

Melvyn said 'I like the idea of your wife getting herself on to the wrong side. That was clever.'

I thought — But Melvyn, if you're so clever, don't you know that you should know more, or nothing?

There were some people at the bar of the pub whom I recognised from meeting them two years ago with Caroline. They were talking about the prospects of war if Hitler moved into Austria: would Austria fight; would Britain and France recognise their obligations. Melvyn went to fetch beer and got into a conversation with them. I thought — But if human life is a matter of style, of means rather than of ends -

— Do I imagine that means just turn up for me?

After a time I followed Melvyn to the bar. I thought — Where are you now, my angel, my loved one.

Melvyn was saying 'The more success Hitler has the more he'll get rid of those terribly useful Jews. And those pretty Aryan boys couldn't boil a cup of pee.'

Then one of the men at the bar, whom I had met when I had been with Caroline, said to me 'There was a chap in here asking about you the other day.'

I said 'Oh was there?'

He said 'A German chap. He heard someone talking about you and Caroline.'

I thought I might say — Do you know what's happened to Caroline?

I said 'Who was he?'

He said 'Working at the university. A philosopher. Got out of Germany a year or two ago. One of them. Said he knew you.'

I said 'Was he called Bruno?'

The man said 'Can't remember his name.'

I thought — Do I really think that things work like this?

I said 'Do you know what's happened to Caroline? I heard she was back from Spain.'

He said 'She's around. Why not call her?'

I thought — But you and I, so we are all right, my angel, my loved one.

Melvyn was saying to someone at the bar 'But I am a secret agent, didn't you know?'

Someone was saying, 'No, I didn't.'

Someone else said 'But how can you be a secret agent if you do not keep it secret?'

Melvyn said 'Good thinking!'

I said 'I'm going.'

Melvyn said 'Stop that man! He's a Nazi agent!'

Out in the street there were placards announcing news of Hitler's latest threats against Austria, of this or that statesman's journeys between London, Vienna, Berchtesgaden. I bought a paper and sat in a cafe. I thought — Well, here we are, my angeclass="underline" out on a mystery tour from the Garden of Eden.

There was news of the latest trial in Russia. Some high-up Soviet dignitary had confessed to crimes that he could not possibly have committed; then in court he had denied his confession; then the next day he had confirmed it again. The newspaper reporter speculated — was this the only way in practice he could make a protest? Or was the whole to-and-fro business a put-up job by the prosecution to give verisimilitude to the ludicrous business of confession? I thought — But the point is, this is all at random, it is chaos.

There was also an item about some minor official on trial who was accused of arranging the distribution of thousands of tons of deliberately poisoned wheat-seed in Odessa. The official was called I. A. Platov. I thought — Might those be the initials of Mitzi's father? Not ofKolya.

Then — If things are random, is it not possible to avoid them?

— But what is surprising about these events in Berchtesgaden, Vienna, Moscow, is not that they happen, but that anything different ever happens -

— Would it not be a miracle if Kolya got to Cambridge!

I saw your face looking in through the cafe window. I had chosen the cafe because it was opposite the building where Melvyn had rooms, but I had not expected you to come back before evening. You came in and said 'I didn't think you would be here.' I said 'No, I didn't think you would be here.' You said 'I've missed you.' I said 'I've missed you too.' You said 'Now we can have lunch.' I said 'Yes, I'm starving.'

Then I said 'I think I may have news of Bruno.'

You said'Oh.'

I said 'He may be at the university.'

'What university?'

'London. You could make enquiries at the central office building.'

You said 'You want me to find Bruno!'

I said 'I don't want you to find Bruno!'

You said 'Oh no, it does not matter what we want, I suppose.'

I said 'Someone told me when I was having a drink in a pub with my horrible friend Melvyn.'

I thought — Those terrible people in Moscow, Vienna, Berchtes-gaden — they get what they want?