Melody and her mates clumped together, touching each other’s limbs provocatively then grinding down to the floor.
All the guys started cheering, and Melody did this self-satisfied smile that made me hate her. The clump broke apart at the chorus and they shimmied into a series of synchronized moves. The cheers got louder. Everyone started clapping in time to the music. I gave Whinnie a desperate look, wishing so much that Evie and Lottie were here to tell me everything I thought was right. But Whinnie obliged by sticking her tongue out and pointing to the back of her throat.
I reluctantly clapped along. I didn’t dare look at Kyle and Russ – not wanting to tarnish our fledgling friendship by seeing them drooling.
The chorus hit and Melody and the others strutted forward. Melody made a beeline right for us.
Not us, Kyle.
I saw his face as he twigged what was going on. He gave me the tiniest look, or maybe I imagined it, then broke into a grin. Melody pointed at him and he gestured down at his torso all overdramatically, like, Who me? She flicked her hair, nodded and plucked him from beside me, dragging him into the middle. Well, “dragging” implies a lack of willingness. Kyle didn’t look like he lacked anything right then. The rest of the dance posse pulled in three other guys, including Watersports.
It’s weird when emotions take over, with no rhyme or reason at all. But that’s what happened as I watched Melody twirl Kyle under her arm before nestling into him. Everything slowed, like the world really wanted to rub this in my face as much as possible. I blinked a lot… They just looked so…good together, as they danced. He was grinning, all not-taking-it-seriously, but when she smiled back at him a tiny something of intimacy crossed their faces. I watched his tanned arms stroke up her body, jokingly, but still with the confidence of a guy that had stroked girls before. She wiggled back, jokingly, but with the confidence of a girl who had wiggled against a guy’s crotch before.
I’d never been to an American high school. But now I felt like all those kids in the movies – the ones who stand watching from the bleachers as Prom Kings and cheerleaders have the time of their lives.
I’d never even kissed anyone. Seventeen – and no one’s lips had ever pressed against mine. I was five foot eleven, ginger, and every boy at school only seemed interested in midget, wannabe pole dancers. I kept hoping they’d grow out of it, or grow into me, or maybe it was just a British boys’ thing… Yet the rules of life were exactly the same, no matter what side of the Atlantic Ocean you were on. All the good feeling from our Monty Python skit evaporated.
I couldn’t look any more so I budged up closer to Whinnie on the log and whispered to her.
“I’ve thought of another thing that makes America worse at feminism than the UK.” She looked up at me expectantly through her big bottle glasses. “… Cheerleaders.”
Whinnie nodded. “Cheerleaders were the curse of my life for a long time.” She pointed to her Winnie the Pooh T-shirt, her glasses, her ponytail. “You think someone like me had an okay time at high school?”
I pointed to my freckles, my ginger hair, and stretched out my long legs in front of me.
“You think I did?”
We both giggled and Russ shushed us, before craning forward again.
It was the final chorus and Melody now stood bent over against Kyle, pushing her bottom into him.
I turned away once more.
“What is it with you and Winnie the Pooh then?” I asked, looking closer at her red Disney T-shirt. “Is it just your name?”
Whinnie’s face looked so lovely lit from the campfire, all warm and open. “Winnie the Pooh is the answer to happiness,” she answered simply.
“And, can I say, ‘huh’?”
“He is the living embodiment of Taoism.”
“Whatism?” I asked.
“Taoism. It’s this philosophy thing,” Whinnie said, stroking the Pooh on her jumper. “Taoists believe human beings overcomplicate life by over-thinking everything all the time, and this makes us unhappy. If you read the Winnie the Pooh books, you’ll see that Pooh is always happy, because he sees things in a simple way. He’s actually on a higher philosophical plane than most of us.”
“So this is far more interesting than Melody proving to an entire campfire of people that she’s sexually attractive,” I whispered. “Tell me more.”
Whinnie’s lips twitched with laughter. “Well, look at the other characters in Winnie the Pooh. They all actually demonstrate that Pooh is the most mentally balanced. There’s Tigger, I mean, that tiger just can’t stay in the moment and enjoy it. He’s too much of a hedonist; he always wants the next adventure. That’s not healthy, he’ll burn out.”
I started properly laughing. “And what about Eeyore?”
“Well he’s a depressive, isn’t he? If Eeyore walked into my doctor’s office he’d be prescribed with a lifetime supply of antidepressants. And not just because US doctors dole them out like candy canes at Christmas.”
The music stopped and I found myself clapping without even looking.
“But Pooh?”
“Pooh lives in the moment. He doesn’t fret about the past, or freak about the future. He’s an expert at mindfulness.”
Kyle walked back to us, smiling, all breathless.
Russ high-fived him. “You lucky bastard.” Kyle sat next to me on the log. I could feel the heat from his body, but it didn’t bother me any more. I was thinking how much Lottie and Evie would love Whinnie.
“Mindfulness is supposed to be the secret to happiness, isn’t it?” I asked her. “One of my friends back home, she has, like, umm, OCD stuff, and they’re sending her away on a mindfulness weekend to help her with her anxiety.”
Whinnie looked triumphant. “You see! And think how long Pooh has been around. He knew the secret to happiness before we did.”
“What you guys talking about?” Kyle asked.
Russ replied. “Don’t ask, man, don’t ask. They were laughing about freakin’ Eeyore all the way through the best part of the night.”
I spun round to face them, my hair flicking into my face. “If you call ‘that’” – I gave Kyle a dirty look – “the best part of the night, then I feel very sorry for you.”
Russ threw up his arms. “What can I say? I’m an obvious guy.”
Whinnie whispered in my ear. “And Melody was making it abundantly clear she was obviously a girl.”
I giggled. “I almost forgot she had boobs, I’m so glad she stroked them to remind me.”
Whinnie wiggled her eyebrows madly. “And I almost forgot she had such a tight ass. It really was very kind of her to rub it up against men so it didn’t fade into obscurity.”
“That would’ve been such a shame.” I nodded. “Nobody with an arse like that wants to have only a cult following. Arses like Melody’s deserve to be mainstream…” I trailed off and pretended to look into the distance. “If only Melody knew that.”
We both dissolved into snorts of bitchy laughter. I knew it probably wasn’t strictly feminist, to bond with one girl by bitching about another… I’m sure Lottie would have some kind of academic term for it. But seeing Melody dance with Kyle had made me feel oddly weak.
Pathetic? Of course. But feelings always are.
The applause died down and Bumface Kevin picked his way to the front. He cleared his throat loudly and we all fell quiet. Kyle, who’d heard our whole bitchy interchange, gave me a quick look. There was no smile in his eyes. I couldn’t tell if he was angry at me, or embarrassed at himself.
“Guys, that was incredible,” Kevin said. “You are ALL INCREDIBLE. We are going to have such an awesome time together. I can’t wait for the kids to arrive tomorrow so we can get this summer started.” Everyone cheered and whooped. Whinnie and I rolled our eyes at each other.
“And now…” Kevin picked up a small wooden drum by his feet. “As is camp tradition, we will welcome in the summer with a drum circle.”