Helena looked surprised.
“Not to worry,” Leland assured her, more gently. “No one suspects you of anything. I just need to speak with you, alone.”
Helena’s expression cleared. “Of course, my lord,” she said quietly. “I’ll be just outside, Daisy,” she said, and went to the door.
Leland followed.
Daisy found herself alone, with Geoff. Then, and only then, did she suddenly understand the unspoken conversation he’d had with the viscount, as clearly as if she had heard it.
“Oh, by all that’s holy,” she muttered, putting her hand to her forehead. “Now I’ve done it. I’ve gone and forced your hand, haven’t I?”
“No, Daisy,” the earl said, as he came to stand before her. “You’ve gone and made me realize that I should ask for your hand, and not dillydally anymore.”
“That’s what I meant,” she said miserably.
Chapter Fifteen
“No one can touch you if you’re my wife,” the earl told Daisy. “There’d be no more talk of murders and such nonsense.”
He hesitated. “I promise you won’t be prosecuted for Tanner’s death, but… I’d like to know. Just between the two of us, and I’ll never speak it again. You had just cause, and I couldn’t blame you, and wouldn’t. But… you didn’t have a hand in it, did you?”
“Oh, Geoff,” she said sadly.
“I’m sorry I asked, but I had to,” he said, his face becoming ruddy. “But think on, if you’d been me, you would have done it, too.”
“Likely,” she said. She looked around the room and sighed. The bookcases were filled with heavy, beautifully covered tomes. She didn’t doubt he’d read them all. It was the room of a rich and educated man. Geoff was proposing marriage to her, but for the first time since she’d met him, that prospect had never seemed farther away.
“So,” he said, smiling again. “Give me your answer and I’ll arrange all the details. My dear Daisy, will you marry me? I confess that I mightn’t have had the audacity to ask a woman half my age for her hand, but it’s clear now that you need me. We’ll deal very well together, I think, and you’ll never have to worry again.”
He hit his forehead with his hand. “Ridiculous proposal! Where’s the romance. Where’s the drama? I ought to have brought flowers, or jewelry. But I never thought I’d actually ask. I’ve been thinking about this for some days now. Only a crisis like this could have forced me into it, though, and I admit, I’ve never been happier that it did. It seems the right thing to do for both of us. I may be too old, but not if you don’t think I am. We might even be able to start a new family. That will be odd-having a child my grandchildren’s age. But we won’t be the first or last to do something like that. I’m old”-he chuckled-“but not incapable. And never fear! You know my boys, Christian, Amyas, and Daffyd. And they know you. They won’t mind; in fact, they’ll be glad, I think.”
He put an arm around her waist, the other went to the back of her neck, and he started to draw near. He was tentative and gentle. He smelled of good shaving soap. But as he neared she could see how weathered his skin was, and that he had a few freckled blotches on his forehead. He had fine eyes, but there were lines around them, as well as those furrows that ran down from the sides of his nose to the sides of his mouth. She saw he was looking at her lips, and his own parted. She closed her eyes. He touched her mouth gently with his.
His mouth was warm and dry, and felt so terribly wrong, she wanted to weep. Her stomach seemed to do a little flip. She shuddered and pulled away.
He dropped his arms and drew back, looking at her with concern.
Daisy looked into his face. It was a dear face to her. So she had to place her words as carefully as she could. “Geoff,” she said softly. “No. It won’t do. I like you very much. The truth is, I came to England with just this in mind. I guess you knew that; everybody did. But do you know why? It’s because you made such an impression on me when I met you. Remember? You were a prisoner, dressed like the others, but you stood out. Everyone listened to what you said. You did the books for the governor! Even Tanner didn’t have a bad thing to say against you. Then you were free, but you were still nice to me. Some days, when I was feeling especially beaten down and trapped, I’d see you, and you always had a smile and a comforting word for me. You were such a gentleman, you made me start dreaming of coming back home one day and meeting a world full of men like you.
“Now here I am, and you’re still a gentleman. And you’re asking what I wanted to hear. But now I know it’s not right. It couldn’t be, though you would be the one to ask in order to set me free again. Geoff, it wasn’t a romantic proposal because it couldn’t be. We’re not in love. I like you very much but I don’t like to think of being in bed with you, or with any man. Thing is, I don’t know if I ever can.”
His expression was instantly one of deep concern.
She nodded. “See, when you were the pattern card of my dreams, that seemed fine, because I thought you wouldn’t care.” She paused; there was no way she could tell him that had been because of how old he was. “But now I know that wouldn’t be fair to the real man I’m talking to,” she said instead. “So thanks, Geoff, but marriage between us wouldn’t be right.”
“Because I’m so old?” he asked.
Trust him to come right out with it. She thought about her answer. “No,” she finally said in all truth. “Actually, because you’re not as old as I thought you’d be.”
“Ah!” he said. “I think I see.” He stepped back. He didn’t seem crushed, or relieved.
She suddenly wondered if this proposal was just Geoff doing what he thought was the right thing. It would be very like him.
“So, what are you going to do?” he asked.
“Fight,” she said, with a shrug. “I didn’t kill Tanner. They can’t prove anything because there’s nothing to prove. I’ll stay on here in England and make a nice, quiet life for myself. Maybe I’ll look for a ninety-year-old man,” she added, on a laugh.
“You would tempt him, too,” the earl said. “But I’m not taking back my proposal. That may be the only way you can really be safe now. They would not deport the wife of an earl with so little evidence. They’d be reluctant to even lay charges, especially about something that happened in another time and place. As it is, they might not be able to do more than frighten you, which, poor girl, they’ve done too well. But remember, there are enough corrupt souls back in the colony who’d lie for nothing, not to mention a sum of money. It would only take one or two to swear to your misdeeds to make enough of a case to have you brought to trial, here, or as I think they’d prefer, there. You might never be convicted, but it’s a long journey there and back again, as you know. Someone would like to make you vulnerable again.”
“For my money,” she breathed.
“Yes, I think so. You’re beautiful, but few men go to such trouble for beauty as they will for money.”
She laughed. “Too true! But I can’t go wrecking your life for my neck, can I? That’s just the kind of thing my father would do. I aim to be different. Can’t you be my friend and put in a word for me here, even if we don’t marry?”
She stood in sunlight, and he couldn’t say whether it was that, or the very fact of her presence, that made the rest of his study look dark. She was at that moment so lovely, so fragile and helpless-looking, that he wished he could say or do anything to make her agree to marry him. It shocked him. He’d only asked her because he’d thought she needed him. Now, for the first time, he realized that he wanted something as bright and beautiful as she was in his life. He’d only looked forward to his grandchildren before. Now he realized he himself had a life left to live.