A moment of silence.
“Where is this show, by the way?” said Charlene.
After a pause, Lars said, “The Democratic Republic of Congo.”
“The Congo?” she said, eyebrows raised. “Wow. Okay.”
“Wait, Mom, what’re you talking about?” said Radar. “I can’t go.”
“Why not?”
“You know I can’t go. I have to find him.”
She looked at him. “He would want you to go.”
“He would?” The words quarrying something small and dense from the depths of his body. He contemplated his mother, wondering if she could be serious. What could compel her to make such a ludicrous suggestion? She needed him. And yet, his fingers began to tingle with current. At the mere possibility of going somewhere. He had never been anywhere.
“No, no,” said Otik, shaking his head. “No, that is not option. I’m sorry, he cannot. He would be like child out there.”
“Hang on,” said Lars. He turned to Radar. “Would you consider it? Kermin always said you were the most talented in the family.”
“He did?” said Radar. He tried to adjust to this piece of news. Kermin said that about him? “Well, to be honest. . I hadn’t really thought about it.”
“Wait, wait, wait,” said Otik. “Everyone, hold on to your horse. Let me just say I am lodging immediate formal complaint. This is not how we are electing team members. This is very important position. I have no idea about this man’s strength in his mind or—”
“Shut up,” said Lars. “Radar? What do you think? Seriously. You could really save us here.”
All at once, Radar remembered Ana Cristina. The feeling of sitting beside her in the store, of her lips, the temperature of her hands on his. Of course he couldn’t go. There were so many reasons he had to stay here, he was surprised he had even entertained the possibility of leaving.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I would love to help you out, but. . I don’t think I’m your man. I can’t.”
“You see?” said Otik. “Even he knows this is not good idea.”
“Why not?” said Charlene. “Why not you?”
“I can’t, Mom,” he said. “You know I can’t.”
“Why?”
“Why?”
“Give me one good reason. And don’t tell me you have to find Kermin, because I can do that by myself. I’ve been looking for him my whole life.”
“Why do you want me to go so badly?” he said.
“I don’t want you to go. You want to go.”
“No, I. .” He began to protest and then stopped. He thought of Ana Cristina again. “You really think I could do Kermin’s job? Me? Radar?” He had intended to say his name as a protest, but it came out sounding like a superhero.
“Of course,” said Charlene, smiling, hearing this. “You’re his son.”
He blinked. His eyes burned.
“I’m his son,” he repeated. “Radar.”
When he said this, it was as if the needle had finally found the groove. A gear shifted, and the machine came to life. Of course. He was Kermin’s son. It was meant to be. They all saw it then.
“Okay,” said Radar.
“Okay what?” said Lars.
“I’ll go. I’ll take his place.” He felt the tingle of leaving already spreading through his bones. He was terrified, quivering in his boots. He hooked his hands in his belt loops to keep them from shaking.
“You realize what this means?” said Lars. “Once you’re in, you’re in.”
Radar nodded. He feared he might collapse, but instead he closed his eyes and said, as coolly as he could manage: “I’m in.”
When he opened them again, he saw his mother dropping her poker and coming to him. Her arms drifted around his neck, and her face came to rest on his shoulder.
“I’m so proud of you,” she whispered.
Otik clapped his hands. “Fine. If it means we go, then okay, he comes. But just know I am still lodging formal complaint, and I am not responsible for him.”
“Formal complaint noted,” said Lars. “And you are responsible for him. We’re all responsible for each other. This is how it works.”
Radar was looking at his mother. “What’re you going to do?”
“What I’ve always done,” she said.
“It could get bad here if the power doesn’t back come on.”
“Oh, I’ll be fine,” she said. “I have the Oldsmobile, don’t I? And they’ll figure it all out eventually. To be honest, I could use a little life without electricity. Maybe I’ll even read some poetry. Go back to Coleridge. It’ll be good for me. As long as I get my smell back, I don’t care about the rest.”
“But what about Tata? And his vircator? We need to hide what he’s done.”
“We can take care of that,” said Lars.
Radar nodded, though he was not sure what that would entail. “And what about him?”
“Kermin?” said Charlene. “Don’t you worry about him. When he comes back, I’ll give him a piece of my mind. I’ll let him know where you went. I’m sure he’ll understand.”
“But he is not coming back,” Otik said, and with that, he turned and headed back to the shack.
• • •
SO WENT THE NIGHT. Radar helped them load the van with the rest of the bird bodies. There were well over a thousand, and each needed to be hung up in a precise way, according to Otik’s instructions. When they were done, the back of the van resembled an avian congregation frozen in time.
“We’ll cover up the vircator in case anyone comes looking. You’d better get your things for the trip,” Lars said as they slammed the van doors shut. “Pack lightly.”
“Lightly?” Radar realized he had never packed for a journey before.
“Does your mother have a cell phone that works?” said Lars.
“I can give her the one I found in Kermin’s Faraday cage.”
“Good,” said Lars. “You can take this one. It should work where we’re going. You can give her the number in case she wants to be in touch. Here, it’s on this paper.”
“Thanks,” said Radar.
“But be quick,” Otik said, emerging from the back of the van. “We have four hours before boat leaves, and there’s still whole house to pack. So no dillydally.”
• • •
RADAR FOUND CHARLENE SEATED at the kitchen table, an array of her tea jars splayed out before her.
“Hi,” he said.
She looked up at him with sad eyes. “I still can’t smell anything,” she said.
“I’m sure it’ll come back.”
She nodded. “You’re leaving?”
“I don’t have to,” he said, sitting down next to her. “Truly. I can stay here with you. I can help you find him.”
“No,” she said. “No. Don’t miss this.”
“Why? What am I going to miss? Everything I want is here. Everyone I care about is here.”
“Radar,” she said. “One day you’ll wake up and your entire life will have gone by without you ever having lived it. Don’t make the same mistake I did. You have to get out of yourself to know who you are.”
He thought about this. Wondered if he should add it to his rule book.
“I’ve never been anywhere before,” he said.
“It’s not true,” she said. “We took you to Belgrade.”
“Oh, yeah.”
“And you’ve been to Norway.”
The only sound was the ticking of the grandfather clock in the other room.
“You know, he did it for me,” he said.
“Did what?”
“The blackout. He was trying to fix me. My epilepsy, I mean.”