“I am? Shoot.”
“It’s this direction.” He pointed to the right.
“Oh.”
“Here. I’ll show you,” he offered. The two of us walked vaguely side by side for a while. “I have to get home to study anyway. I’m taking this lit class at the U, you know? We have an exam at the end of the week.”
“Really? That’s cool.”
“Not really,” he said.
I laughed. “The class, not the exam.”
“Right.” Conor coughed. “So. Are you and Sean like…an item?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe,” I said.
“Can I give you a little advice?” Conor asked.
“On finding gloves in the dark? Or what?” I asked.
“Be careful,” he said. “See…Sean has this way of drawing lots of people to him. And sometimes he hurts people when he doesn’t mean to, because he doesn’t realize.”
“Realize what. He’s popular? I think he knows that,” I said.
“Look. It’s not just about being popular. It’s—whether he really cares about anyone, besides himself. He’s incredibly selfish.”
“And you’re not,” I said.
“Come on, Kirsten. Trust me,” he said.
“Why should I trust you? Over him?”
“Because I have no reason to lie. I’m not involved.”
“But he is your brother,” I said. “And you are walking me home so that you can tell me to stay away from him. Which is over-involved, if you ask me.”
“Never mind. Forget I said anything.”
I could hardly look at him, I was so mad. First he thought I was rushing off to see my “hometown honey,” and now what? Was he following me home to make sure I wasn’t? And what was with the criticizing Sean? Brotherly love, it wasn’t.
I was relieved to see Emma’s car parked on the street outside Gretchen’s when we got there. “That’s Emma’s.” I pointed to the Explorer. “She’s here, too.” Maybe I should have had my friends come out, so I could show him that Jones was in fact a girl. But I didn’t need to prove anything to him. “Emma and Jones. Best friends.”
“Sounds like a musical group. Where do they live?”
“Outside Duluth, like me,” I said.
“You guys have plans for the weekend?” Conor asked.
“Uh, I don’t know,” I said. “Why?”
“Well, we have a club hockey game tomorrow morning. Outside, down at the lake,” Conor said. “It’s kind of a tradition. Playing outdoors like in the old days. Sean’s on one of the clubs and I’m on the other,” he explained.
“Why am I not surprised?” I mumbled.
“What?”
“Nothing.” Why wouldn’t he come closer? He insisted on talking to me across the lawn. Was he afraid I’d tackle him again, the way I did when he came here to shovel? “I would say thanks for walking me home,” I said, “but I think it’s more like thanks for following me home.”
“I wasn’t following you,” he said. “I was just being careful.”
“Okay, well, whatever. Thanks,” I said.
“Yeah. Have fun with your friends. Jones, Smith, Bridget Jones, whoever.” Conor turned to walk home, while I laughed, opened the door and slipped inside.
“Who was that guy?” Jones asked. She completely startled me. She’d been standing by the door, watching the two of us say goodnight.
“Oh, him. He’s…he’s…well…see, sometimes he’s kind of a jerk—”
“Then why are you smiling?”
Before I could answer her, Emma came clomping down the stairs in her clogs, arms outstretched for a big hug. “It’s so good to see you!” she cried. “Where have you been?”
Would they even believe me if I told them I was sledding with this guy I like, and I made a move on him?
What if I told them, but it didn’t work out with Sean, and then I’d be embarrassed? There was a certain humiliation factor that I had to avoid, but these were my best friends and I desperately wanted to share. “Well, see, we were sledding and…”
“Sledding. No wonder you’re covered in snow.” Emma brushed at the back of my jeans. “You’re not going to believe what happened today.”
“No kidding! First of all,” Jones said under her breath, “we’ve been here for half an hour already making small talk with Gretchen. She tried to serve us those nasty health crackers.”
I got my secret stash of chips from the kitchen and we grabbed some cans of pop and headed upstairs to my room. Emma immediately launched into a story about how she and Cameron had a huge screaming fight in the middle of school, and how the weekend was off now, except that now Kyle wanted to take her, but she didn’t really like Kyle that way except that he had given her lots of nice presents….
As usual, we started inundating her with questions, and advice. Neither one asked any more about my situation.
In a way, that was okay, because I thought maybe I would ruin it by talking about it. Sometimes something so good happens that you’re afraid to jinx it by saying it out loud.
“Ten to one they get back together tomorrow,” Jones said as she snuggled into her sleeping bag on the floor at about two o’clock in the morning. I’d given Emma my bed, and I was sacked out on an airbed beside Jones.
“Ten to one? More like one to ten,” I said, and Jones laughed.
“I am so beat. I bet I fall asleep in five minutes,” Jones said.
“Me too,” I agreed, pulling the blanket up around my neck and adjusting the pillow.
I closed my eyes and thought about the night I’d had. I loved going sledding with Sean; even more, I loved the fact that I’d kissed him, and that he’d seemed interested.
But I couldn’t get over the fact that Sean had also looked sort of stunned, as if what I did was too forward. Like we were just friends.
It wasn’t as if Sean didn’t enjoy spending time with me, because we’d done a lot together, and there was definitely an attraction between us. Wasn’t there?
So why had he looked so surprised when I first kissed him? Was it just because all his friends were around?
I wished I could fall asleep thinking about what a great kiss it had been—because it had been—instead of worrying about what he thought about the kiss.
I knew what I thought about it. I wanted to kiss him again. Soon.
Chapter 10
“Didn’t we meet him the last time we were here?” Jones asked as Sean skated past us at the lake, wearing full hockey regalia, passing the puck to another player.
“Didn’t he kick us off the ice?”
“Not exactly,” Emma said. “I think we left on our own.”
I laughed. “Maybe we did, but it was strongly suggested that we take off.”
We’d arrived while the hockey game was in progress, because it took us forever to get going in the morning. We sat around talking and watching stupid things on TV for too long, so we couldn’t get anywhere at a decent hour. There was a fairly large crowd standing around the rink watching the game with us. A chalkboard perched on a chair had the score at 1-1.
“But is that the guy who helped you up when you crashed?” Emma asked.
I nodded. “That’s Sean.”
“Holy cow is he good,” Jones said as he skated past again. “So, is that the guy who was talking to you last night?”
I shook my head. “No, that’s his brother.”
“I’m confused.” Emma sipped her cup of coffee. “Which one is which?”
It was hard to identify any of the players because they had so much hockey gear on, including helmets and goalie masks. “Sean’s brother’s name is Conor. He’s playing goalie in that end. He’s on the opposite club from Sean.”