“You guys are so weird.” I snorted, shaking my head.
Ezra shrugged. “We’re practically like brothers, after a while you find you don’t care what the fuck you say to each other. Besides, if you can’t joke around life gets pretty boring.”
“That’s true.”
I set my beer aside, not bothering to take a drink. The last thing I needed was a buzz right now.
“Come on! Get in! It’s hot!” Emma called, floating on her back. Maddox splashed her and she retaliated with an even bigger splash.
“They’re not going to leave us alone until we get in,” I told Ezra.
He sighed. “You’re right.”
He emptied his beer and stood up, tossing his baseball cap onto the dock. He reached a hand down to me and I took it, letting him haul me up. I stumbled into his chest and he steadied me before we both toppled over.
He chuckled lowly and smoothed my hair away from my face. “Are you okay?”
I swallowed thickly. “Mhmm, yeah. Great.” I definitely was not affected at all. Nope. Not even a little bit.
“We have an audience,” he whispered in my ear.
I jerked away from him like I’d been electrocuted.
When I looked out at the lake Maddox wasn’t paying attention to us, but Emma was. Her eyes were narrowed and I could tell she’d be asking me about this later. Fantastic.
Ezra reached for my hand again and we stepped up to the edge of the dock. I wanted to pull away since I knew Emma was watching, but I didn’t.
“Ready?”
“Yeah.”
Together we jumped into the water. The temperature of it was cool, but it felt like heaven against my heated skin.
We came up and Maddox hollered. “Perfect score!”
“That wasn’t even a dive!” Ezra yelled back as he swam towards his friend.
Emma was already headed my way and I wished I could sink beneath the surface of the water and disappear.
When she reached me she pushed the wet strands of her blonde hair away from her eyes. “Are you still going to tell me nothing is going on with you guys?” She arched a brow.
“I think you need your eyesight checked,” I quipped, “because you’re seeing things.”
“I’m not blind or stupid.” She glared at me, the skin beneath her freckles turning red—and not from a sunburn. “You used to tell me everything, even things I didn’t want to know, and now you tell me nothing. I feel like I don’t know you anymore.” She frowned, her shoulders sagging even as she moved her arms to stay afloat.
The truth was, Emma and I had been growing apart for a while. That was why Ezra and I had grown so close the last few years. Our best friends ditched us for each other, so we ended up becoming friends. While Ezra had maintained his close relationship with Maddox I hadn’t done the same with Emma. It wasn’t all her fault though. She’d been wrapped up in Maddox and I’d been wrapped up in Braden.
“We used to do everything together,” she continued. “I miss our sleepovers and pigging out on way too much pizza while watching those stupid shows you seem to love.”
I laughed and began to smile. “Yeah, that was always fun.”
“Maybe we should do that again?” She suggested, her voice meek sounding.
“We’re grown ups now, Emma.”
“So?” She countered. “Maybe the mistake in growing up is thinking that everything you used to do was childish.”
“You really want to have a sleepover?”
She nodded eagerly. I hated to let her down, because lately I’d been letting everyone down, including myself.
“Let’s do it then. You provide the pizza, I’ll pick the stupid shows.” I mimed her tone with a laugh.
“Deal.” She smiled back.
“We’ll have to do it at your place, though,” I told her, “I wouldn’t feel right taking over Ezra’s place with girly stuff.”
“Sounds good. Tonight?”
“Sure,” I said, even though I cringed
I sent up a silent prayer that at this sleepover she’d let the topic of Ezra go, but I knew that wasn’t likely. Emma was too perceptive. Besides, she’d already brought it up too many times for me to believe she’d suddenly stop asking me about it.
She swam away from me, over to Maddox, no doubt to tell him about our plan for a sleepover.
Ezra swam over to me, his dark hair plastered to his forehead. “Is everything okay?” He asked. “It looked like you were having an intense conversation.”
“Everything is fine,” I assured him, “but we’re going to have a sleepover tonight. Emma wants us to…reconnect,” I said, for lack of a better word.
“Reconnect, huh?” He arched a brow.
I shrugged. “We haven’t hung out much in a long time.”
“Ezra!” Maddox called, drawing his attention away from me and over to his friend. “The girls are having a sleepover tonight, which means we are too! Are you ready for me, buddy?” Maddox raised his fists in the air. “I’m going to whoop your ass on Call of Duty.”
“You wish.” Ezra rolled his eyes.
They began bickering back and forth about different video games and Emma swam back to me.
“We’ve lost them to nerd land,” she declared, but she smiled when she said it. She glanced over at Maddox and love shone in her eyes.
I wondered if I’d ever looked at Braden like that—like he was my whole world. I doubted it.
I swam away from Emma and onto the shore. I grabbed my towel and shook it out before lying down on top. Emma joined me, doing the same with her towel. The guys continued to goof around in the lake. No surprise there.
It grew quiet between us when Emma picked up a book to read, but a little while later she voiced, “Are you happy?”
I glanced over at her, puzzled by the random question.
“I’m just wondering,” she defended, “after everything that’s happened the last month if you’re happy now.”
I looked away from her and out at the shimmering water of the lake. “No,” I answered honestly. “I mean, I’m not miserable, but I’m not exactly happy either.” How could I be when I felt like a shell of the person I used to be?
Emma rolled over onto her stomach and propped her body up on her elbows. “What can I do to help?”
I gave her a small smile. “No one can help me with this. This is all on me. Don’t worry,” I assured her, “I’ll find my way back to my happy place one day.”
“Good.” She reached over and gave my arm a playful squeeze. “I miss the peppy Sadie.”
I laughed. “Admit it, you totally want to choke me when I get hyper.”
She grinned. “Okay, so I have had some fantasies of knocking you out when you get a little crazy, but I miss that you’re not like that anymore. Maybe the sleepover will be step one into resurrecting you,” she winked.
“Yeah, maybe so,” I agreed.
I really hoped so.
“I can’t believe you’re abandoning me so soon after our…arrangement.”
I turned around sharply at the sound of Ezra’s voice.
“That’s it, you need to wear your boots all the time so that I can hear you, because otherwise you sneak up on me all stealth-like. Stop trying to be a ninja, Ezra.” I scolded him, taking a deep breath to calm myself.
He chuckled, leaning against the doorway. His hair was still damp from his shower and the woodsy scent of his soap filled the air. He’d changed into a white wifebeater and a pair of basketball shorts. I hated how he made such a simple ensemble look so amazing. It was completely unfair.
He strode into the room and sat on the edge of my bed. Or—er—I guess technically it was his bed, since this was his house, and—why the hell was I obsessing over this? The answer was simple, because I was trying to ignore the searing force of his dark gaze.
“Going away for a while?” He arched a brow.
“I’m a girl,” I defended, zipping my overnight bag closed, “we need a lot of stuff.”