The shelter is big enough to accommodate ten residents with full staff at any one time. With twelve private bedrooms, large enough for mothers with children, two large communal dining rooms, and an industrial-size kitchen, they will have the privacy to come and go as they please, with the option to interact with anyone else in the house in the communal areas.
“You know, I wish I had this as an option.” Mackenzie steps into one of the bedrooms and walks around.
“Wish you did too, darlin’.” I watch her face as she takes in the room, running her hand along the freshly painted wall.
“I was lucky I had Heidi, and you.” She looks up, and I take a moment to see how far she’s come. She’s no longer this jumpy, scared woman in fear of her life. She doesn’t let the past hold her back. She’s stronger, braver.
“You did good, Kenz. Even without all this.” She shrugs, like the statement is questionable. But it’s not. She’s come so fucking far.
“Maybe, but I still wish I did some things differently. Wish I never went to her that night.” She’s talking about Heidi.
“And who knows what would have happened to you then, darlin’, if you didn’t get away.”
“At least Heidi wouldn’t be missing, God knows where she is because of me, Beau.” It’s the first time she has spoken about Heidi in a while. I don’t want to upset her, but maybe she’s willing to open up about it. She’s been so shut down, I don’t know where her head is at.
“We’ll find her, darlin’.”
“I doubt it.” She worries at her lip, and I wonder what the hell that’s supposed to mean.
“I understand your doubt in the sheriff’s department, but I’ve told you before, Jackson is on our side.”
“You’re right. I’m just over reacting. Heidi probably ran off and got married.” She steps up to me, and wraps her arms around my middle. My arms instantly wrap around her, pulling her closer into me.
Her apprehension rings out loud and clear, and I understand it. After all, the last conversation she had with her friend wasn't very comforting for her. I wish I could take it away. I wish I had more information to tell her, to ease the worry in her heart.
The truth is the chances of finding Heidi are slim. But I’m not telling Mackenzie that. She’s been through so much, has lost so much. If we discover she lost her friend, too, I don't know if she will ever recover.
Not wanting to keep us in this moment, I don’t push the conversation anymore. “Come on, you’ve seen around. Let’s go.” I take her hand in mine as we move back through the shelter to start locking up.
“We’re going home?” She reaches for her bag.
“No, we gotta head to the clubhouse. Our presence is needed.”
“Great.” She sighs but grins when I turn to look at her reaction. She acts like she’s uncomfortable around them, but we both know that’s not the case. She’s starting to become part of the family. The girls have accepted her into their fold, and once the guys find out I’ve claimed her as mine, it won’t be long till they’re giving her shit over me.
“Don’t worry. It’s just a family BBQ,” I tell her as I lead her out the same way we came in. I didn’t take her to last week’s one, after Nix specifically told me to; instead, I opted to keep her in my bed, nowhere near ready to share her.
“Maybe I should just hang back at home then.” She tries to get out of it, but if I’m going, she’s coming. She’s family.
“Come on. The quicker we do this, the quicker I can have you back in my bed.” Once out, I follow behind her pulling the door closed with me before grabbing the keys out of my pocket and locking up.
“I’m serious, Beau.” I drape my arm around her shoulders and steer us back to my bike.
“And this is me showing you I haven’t had enough, darlin’.” I won’t let her try to weasel her way out of it. Before she tries to fight it more, I take her bag and stash it in my saddlebag, plant her ass on my bike, take my seat in front of her, and start it up. She stops her arguing, wraps her arms around my waist and molds her front to my back.
Just like that, she submits.
Fuck me, could she be any more perfect?
Twenty-Three
Mackenzie
“Don’t accept a drink from anyone unless it’s from Jesse or any of his staff. And don’t leave the club,” Beau reminds me of his rules while I get ready for my night out with the girls a couple of weeks later. I know he’s only looking out for me, and I appreciate it, but he needs to take a breather.
“Yes, Beau.” I hold back my eye roll and step into one of my new dresses Kelly helped me pick out yesterday. It’s not my first rodeo with these ladies, but it is the first time without a tail.
“I’m not fucking messing around, darlin’.”
“Beau, I’m not some eighteen-year-old girl who doesn’t know her surroundings. Do you think I’m naïve? Zip me up?” I step up to my bed and turn my back for him to complete my request.
“Darlin’, your crazy asshole ex is still out there. You’re lucky I’m even letting you out of my sight.” His fingers find the zipper and he pulls it up in a slow and deliberate pace that ends in a kiss on my exposed shoulder.
“He obviously isn’t coming back. It’s been over three months, or he would have by now. I’m sure we can relax a little more,” I reply to his overprotectiveness. I hate that he’s still so wired when I’ve become complacent. Guilt continues to pester me. I have made him this way, asked him to be this person. And even though it hurts me now, there is no way I can undo it. Not now. Maybe with time, he too will let it go.
Then again, maybe not.
“Don’t fuck around with me on this, Mackenzie.” He spins me back to face him. “I’m not relaxing until he’s found.” His eyes hold on to mine and a wave of anxiety washes over me.
I wish it didn’t have to be like this.
“And if you never find him, Beau?” I croak, quickly clearing my throat.
“Then you’re stuck with me.” His gaze leaves mine and travels down my body, and I’m thankful. I don’t know if I can hide my uneasiness any longer.
“Fuck, this dress isn’t good, darlin’.” I look down at my black figure-hugging, one-shoulder dress. I wasn’t too sure when Kelly showed me it on the hanger, but as soon as I stepped into it, I knew it was perfect.
“What’s wrong with it?”
“I’m fucking hard just with one look.” He stands and steps in close to me so his erection sits against my stomach.
“I’m not changing.” I blurt the first thing that comes to mind.
“Didn’t ask you to.” He trails his finger along the low dip of my cleavage. He’s right. He didn’t say anything about changing.
“But you want me to, right?” I remember all the times Chad asked me to change and dictated what I wore.
“I do, for my own selfish reasons. But I’m not gonna tell you to change.” He steps out of my space and sits back on the bed.
“Is this like some reverse psychology?” I question, not sure what he’s playing at.
“No darlin’. I might not like the thought of some sleazy fucker checking you out, but I’m not gonna tell you to change outfits to meet my wants or needs.” He rests back against my headboard and crosses his feet at the ankles.
“You’re not?” I ask, watching him carefully.
“Not him, darlin’. I might like to control you when I’m fucking you, but you’re your own woman. You wear what the fuck you want to wear. I’ll deal.” I don’t say anything for a second, unsure how to respond. He’s right. He’s nothing like Chad. My mouth wants to blurt I love you, but my head forces it to shut up. Instead of talking, I spin and move to my dresser to finish my makeup.