“I’m in love with you,” she said again.
“Are you sure?”
“Very sure.” Her hands were on my face, her touch soft, soothing.
If there was anyone who could say anything to me that would get me through this fucked-up morning, Tenley was the person and those were the words. “Really?”
Her knuckles drifted from my temple to my chin. Then she followed the path with her lips until she reached my mouth. “I love you.”
All the pent-up, festering emotion exploded out of me. “I love you so fucking much.” I kissed her hard. “That night you left? That was when I knew. It wasn’t until you were gone that I realized how much I needed you, and after you came back I wasn’t sure if I could tell you, but it’s been killing me not to say it. Shit. I’m ruining this. Why can’t I shut the fuck up?”
Tenley’s hands smoothed over my shoulders, down my arms, and back up. It distracted me from my ranting, which was a fucking embarrassment in the wake of such a declaration.
“I love you,” she whispered, taking my bottom lip between her teeth.
Then she shifted and everything lined up, my cock sliding lower against her.
“We should do this in the bed,” I said.
“Right here is perfectly fine.”
She hooked her ankles around my waist, securing our position. It made arguing difficult. I tried anyway. “The bed seems more appropriate, don’t you think?”
“Fuck appropriate.” Her legs tightened and the piercing breeched the threshold.
“I really do love you. You know that?” It came out more groan than words.
“I know.” Tenley pulled her hair over one shoulder, exposing that glorious fresh ink in the mirror. “Now show me.”
The desperate need leached out of me, replaced by a different desire. I’d fantasized about this exact position, being inside her, having a perfect view of both my art on her body and her face. As much as I would have liked the soft comfort of my bed, the view was incredible.
What started out hot and frantic turned into something much better. It was a controlled glide and retreat, our lips brushing with every gentle thrust. The pad of her thumb swept over my eyebrow, then over my viper bites. She followed with her mouth.
“I can always put them back in if you want me to,” I said.
“I’ll love you just as much with or without them.”
It was exactly what I needed to hear.
Tenley held my gaze as she came, and I could see the truth in the words she’d uttered reflected there. It was the closest I’d ever been to her. I never wanted to lose that feeling.
After my second shower, Tenley finally convinced me to get dressed. I was reluctant to wreck the fantastic start to my day by going to the storage facility; staying naked was a preferable option. But I’d postponed it long enough.
I put on a pair of dress pants while Tenley picked out a shirt and tie. She hung them in the bathroom while I shaved, since I’d gotten waylaid from the task earlier. Next came the steel removal.
“You’re not taking out the one in your tongue, are you?” Tenley asked as she sat on the bathroom counter to watch.
“And miss out on the sounds you make when I go down on you? Fuck, no.”
She flushed and smiled. “Good.”
I removed the eyebrow ring, but I needed a pair of pliers and Tenley’s help to take out the viper bites. I sat on the edge of the tub while Tenley carefully loosened the tiny, silver balls from each ring. She threaded the hoops through my lip and dropped them into my palm. I poked at the spot; the absence of steel felt odd.
She leaned down and kissed the place where the bites used to be. “You’re gorgeous no matter what, Hayden.”
I laughed to hide my discomfort. It was definitely one of the things I worried about. Part of the reason Tenley had been attracted to me was because of my otherness. Take away some of the steel and I looked just like everyone else, aside from the ink.
Tenley passed me my shirt and waited until my arms were through the sleeves before she started fastening the buttons. When she was done, she knotted my tie and took a step back. “Check yourself out.”
I went over to the bathroom mirror, nervous I would end up looking like a douche. The haircut and the lack of facial piercings made the change pretty fucking extreme. Aside from the industrial and the antihelix rings, no one would know about my predilections. They were hidden under clothes and a guise of normalcy.
“You’re still the same person,” Tenley said, her arm coming around my waist, her cheek resting against my biceps. “The way you look doesn’t have an impact on who you are.”
Tenley drove to the storage facility because I was too antsy. It had been a couple of years since I’d been out here, and longer since I’d been inside. It was exactly as I remembered it—creepy as fuck. The location reminded me of the layout for horror-movie gore scenes: rows upon rows of garage-type bays with numbers identifying each one.
Tenley followed my directions until we reached the bay Nate had rented when he and Cassie cleaned out the house. Tenley let the engine idle while I mustered the energy necessary to get out of the car.
After a few minutes, she gave my hand a squeeze. “We don’t have to do this.”
“I’m good. I just need another minute.”
Another minute turned out to be ten, but Tenley didn’t push. She held my hand and waited for me to grow some balls. When I finally opened the car door, she turned off the engine and followed behind. I used the key Nate had given me, followed by the assigned code. The sound of the locking mechanism was reminiscent of gunshots, and I had to remind myself we were perfectly safe. No one was waiting inside to ambush us. I lifted the bay door and the automatic lights flickered on.
Even though my stomach was empty, I felt as if I were going to throw up. I immediately started to chew on the corner of my mouth, but the steel rings weren’t there anymore. I flicked out my tongue ring and made the circuit back and forth over my lips, instead. It was moderately soothing. Tenley’s hand moving in circles on my back helped, too.
Nothing had changed since the last time I was here. The unit was full of boxes and antique furniture wrapped carefully in plastic or protective blankets. I could recall just from the shape of each piece what it looked like underneath. The first seventeen years of my life was packed inside this place. I’d spent the better part of a decade trying to forget it all. It hadn’t worked.
“Cassie did a better job organizing this place than she did in the basement of Serendipity. It was a shit-ton of work,” I said, mostly just to fill the silence.
“She must have had help.”
“She wouldn’t let anyone touch a thing. She went to the house every day for weeks, boxed things up, and then moved them here.”
“Everyone grieves differently, I suppose.” Tenley snuggled into my side; the contact kept me grounded.
“Her way was better than mine.”
Time gave so much in the way of clarity. I could see now how difficult it had been for Cassie when she lost her sister because in many ways she lost me, too. Not forever, but for a long while. We were close, even during the beginning of my rebellious, ass-hole teen phase. She’d been the one person I could go to when I screwed up and needed to find a way to fix things. But I’d been so submerged in guilt and blame afterward, I cut her off along with everyone else.
I exhaled a heavy breath and stepped across the threshold. As organized as it was, the space made me feel panicky—all the stuff just sitting there in boxes with no real place or function. Moving toward an ornate cherry desk, I ran my hand over the plastic-covered surface.
“This used to be in my mom’s office. She always had a stash of twenties in the back of this drawer. I never touched them, though.”