He laughed softly.
God, she loved his laugh. “I can’t drive when you do that,” she murmured.
“The talking, or the touch?”
“Both. Where’s the gas?”
He pulled his hands from beneath her shirt and showed her, and then wrapped his arms around her. “Ready?”
Yeah, she was ready. For all of it. The air was crisp and icy, but she wasn’t cold, not with Cam’s rock-solid body pressed up to hers. In fact, thanks to his erotic teasing, she was the opposite of cold, and getting hotter by the second. “Hold on.” She smiled. “Hold on and don’t let go.”
“I won’t.”
And with a gulp of air, she hit the gas.
She drove far better than Cam expected, recovering from her fears like a pro. At the bank, she slid off the snowmobile and smiled at him as she took off the helmet. “My next adventure is going to have a hard time living up to this one.”
Yeah, so was his.
With another smile, she headed up the shoveled path to the bank as if on top of her own world. She had a nice walk and a sweet ass, in or out of those ski pants he’d given her, and he just stood there watching a moment. He’d resisted her for three weeks now, partly because his family kept getting in his way, and partly-mostly-out of self-preservation. She was already more than a one-night stand to him, and as one of those had never worked out before, he’d told himself he’d had good reason to keep back.
But he was over his past kicking him in the teeth.
Over.
It.
As Katie lived her life, he was no longer going to let a little fear stop him. On anything. Still smiling in marvel at that, he looked around at the sound of boots on the snow and came face-to-face with a part of his past, the part that had once kicked him in the teeth the hardest.
Serena.
“Hello, Cam,” she said softly. “It’s been a while.”
Yeah. Since the day he’d found out she’d slept with someone else, the day he’d crashed and burned.
Serena pushed her dark hair over her shoulder, the hair he’d once loved draped over his body, and gestured to her bakery. “How about some coffee? I’ve got freshly made brownies.”
She was gorgeous as always, her shiny hair scented with the perfume that had once driven him crazy. He waited for a blast of pain and was surprised to find it muted. “I’ve tasted your sweets, thanks.”
“Cam.” She looked so disappointed.
Yeah, he knew that look as well as her scent.
“I was hoping we could be friends.”
“You know, that’s not worked out so well for me before.”
“I’ve tried to apologize. I didn’t mean to-”
“Cheat?”
“I’m not asking to get back together.” Stepping closer still, she put a hand on his arm, gently squeezing his biceps. “I’m asking to be friends. You seem in the mood for new ones.” She tossed a meaningful look toward the bank. When he didn’t say anything, she sighed. “She’s sweet, but no one knows you like I do. Come on, Cam, come inside. We’ll talk, we’ll…” She slid her hand up into his hair, smiling warmly.
He caught her fingers, and she fell quiet, studying him a long beat. “Something’s different.” She looked him over some more. “You’re relaxed. Less edgy.”
“Maybe.”
“Definitely.”
“Look, I have to go get gas for the snowmobile-”
“I’m glad you’re finally back,” she said quietly. “Please come inside. Those warm brownies have your name all over them.” She leaned in to put her mouth to his ear. “Remember what we used to accomplish with just cookie dough? You’d eat it off my-”
“Don’t.” He’d thought seeing her again would kill him. He hadn’t thought he’d ever get to the place where he didn’t want her to hurt as much as she’d hurt him. But oddly enough, he didn’t feel the urge to see her hurt at all. He didn’t feel much of anything really, except maybe the need to get the hell out of there.
Progress. Go figure. “I’m sorry.” And he meant it. “But I don’t want to go over our past.”
“What do you want?”
Only a few weeks ago, his response would have been something hurtful, maybe cruel. Instead, he came out with the utter truth. “Nothing.”
“Okay, so you want me to pay some more, I get it-”
“No.” He stepped back so that her hands fell from him. “I don’t want you to pay.”
Confused, she was searching his gaze, looking for hidden meaning, or the catch. “You stayed away so long. I thought-I actually worried you’d never come back.”
“I didn’t stay away to get back at you, or even because of you. I just needed…something.”
“I can understand. You were restless. Probably bored without racing. It’s how I felt when you were gone all the time. It got me into trouble. Don’t let it get you into trouble, Cam.”
He glanced at the snowmobile, where he’d just ridden across the countryside while holding on to Katie, grinning just about the whole way. For those few moments, he hadn’t felt restless at all. Or frustrated, or empty. He’d been hugged up to Katie and he’d felt…amazingly alive. “I think I’m going to be okay.”
Serena stared up at him for a long moment, then let out a mirthless laugh as her gaze slid to the bank. “Don’t fool your-self, Cam. You’re not going to be the right man for her. I’ve met her. She’s so…open. Open and expressive.”
“So.”
“So she’ll want a man who’s open and expressive as well. And that’s not you. Hell, I had to strip you naked every night just to get you to express yourself.” She shook her head. “You’re not her type. Oh, you’ll play with her for a while before you realize that, but eventually you’ll hurt her.”
When his gaze locked on hers, she nodded. “You know I’m right. About all of it. You hurt me, Cam. I’m just sorry I hurt you back.”
Yeah, hell. He had hurt her. “I’m sorry, Serena. So damn sorry.”
“Are you? Then make it up to me. Call me.”
“I can’t.” He said this as kindly as he could, but he didn’t want to give her false hopes. “Serena, I won’t call you.”
She stared at him, then let out a low, unhappy laugh. “I’ve been waiting for you to come to your senses, but you’re over me. You’re really over me.”
Cam watched Katie come out of the bank and smile at him, and he thought, Yeah, he really was.
But that didn’t mean he got to move on to hurting someone else. Katie was here taking a baby step, doing her best to move on with her life. How he’d ever thought sleeping with her would help her, he had no idea. Probably because he’d been thinking of himself.
“Don’t be selfish with her, Cam,” Serena said quietly, nailing the point home. “For once in your life.”
If he, indeed, was trying to grow up and move on, he had to admit, she was right. He wouldn’t be selfish, not with Katie.
Chapter 14
As Cam let Katie drive back to the lodge, Serena’s words echoed in his head, all while extremely aware of how warm and sweet and sexy she felt in his arms.
Don’t be selfish with her, Cam. For once in your life…
And he had been plenty selfish in his life, she was right about that. Katie had been through hell, and yet unlike him, she was making something of herself. Trying to be happy.
Sleeping with her would make him happy, of that he had no doubt. It’d ease a tension he couldn’t seem to shake.
But what would it do for Katie? He knew enough about her to know that when she slept with someone, it meant something to her. She wasn’t a one-night stand woman. She deserved better from him. Much better.
When she pulled them up to the equipment garage, she sighed in pleasure, staying where she was a moment, her head resting back on his chest. “Thanks for the ride.”
“You drove.”
“And thanks for that too.” She slid out of his arms and off the snowmobile. When she caught sight of his face, her smile slowly slipped away. “What’s the matter?”