But it was the other part that was even more stupendous-and dangerous. She’d felt so…connected to him. She hadn’t let herself feel connected to anyone or anything, not deeply, since her family was torn apart after the fire. The losses had been too unbearable. Yet something about Griff reached her. He was alone the same way she was. She kept having the sense of her hand reaching his across a universe, finding the only other soul who might just understand her kind of loneliness.
She closed her eyes. Tried to sleep. When that failed, she tried pacing the room in the dark. Then she tried brushing her hair, standing in front of the fan. When she still wasn’t ready to sleep, she switched on the bedside lamp and turned on her laptop. She wasn’t about to call her youngest sister in the middle of the night; she just sent her a short email, asking for a connect when Sophie had a chance.
Somewhere around four in the morning, Lily’s body finally caved. She closed up, turned off, and tuned out. She’d just shut her eyes when her cell phone vibrated.
Sophie’s voice was wide awake. “I’ve been worried to bits about you.”
“What on earth are you doing up?”
“I know it sounds crazy, but it seems to be a newlywed thing. We start talking and can’t stop. Mess around, fall asleep, start talking again. This love thing is exhausting. Now. Forget me. Fill me in.”
Lily peeled out the whole story of her meeting with Mr. Renbarcker. The fires. How she’d come home to find out once and for all what caused their family fire, and hopefully to clear their dad’s name. And she was finding answers, but those answers just seemed to lead to more troubling questions.
“The only truly wonderful thing so far, was talking with Mr. Renbarcker. Everything he said reminded me of dad. How dad was so happy. I remember him laughing, playing with us, being with us. The way his arm would loop around mom when we were all watching TV or walking in the park.”
Sophie picked up that thought. “I could never believe it, either. That dad could have caused that fire. But I didn’t know if all of us were in denial.”
“That’s just it. Why I had to come back. I need to know the whole truth, whatever it is.”
“Which is fine,” her baby sister said. “Only, if you’re finding out things that are making you afraid, I want you to get out of Dodge.”
“No. That’s not the real problem.”
Sophie put on her bossy sister voice. “I hear fear in your voice, Lily.”
“Because I’m petrified.”
“That’s it! Get out of there. Or I’ll fly there-and get Cate to come with me. We’ll both-”
Lily cut to the chase. “I’m not afraid about the fire. Or anything to do with the past. The problem is…well, it’s a man.”
“Say what?”
“A man.”
Sophie tapped her phone, making Lily’s ears pop. “Is this my sister talking? The schoolteacher who goes to jewelry parties and craft shows? The one who’s idea of a fun evening is rereading Jane Austen?”
“He’s all wrong for me. I’m going to leave. He’s going to stay. He’s got a long reputation for loving women and not committing. I never even passed an elementary course in flirting.”
“You slept with him.” Sophie didn’t make it a question.
“It can’t work. I totally know that. So I’m trying to just be cool, enjoy falling off the mountain before the crash. Why can’t I have a wild affair? You and Cate have been telling me to do it for years.”
“Since when did you listen to us? You can’t have a wild affair, because a wild affair isn’t you.”
“But maybe it is. Maybe for once in my life, I need to do exactly this. Have a completely irresponsible, hedonistic, dangerous, crazy sexy affair. Knowing there’s no future. Just doing it because…because I’ve never wanted anything more. Never wanted anyone more.”
“Then why are you scared?”
“What if I can’t get over him? What if this is so…huge. This heart thing. This man. That no other guy will ever come close?”
“Okay. I’m trying to think reasonably here. I won’t call Cate this second. I won’t go out and buy a gun to shoot him. But that’s what I want to do. If he hurts you, if he hurts you in even an eensy, tiny way-”
“Soph, everyone gets hurt. Nobody can save anybody that.”
They were still talking, her sister’s voice as familiar as her own heartbeat, their ways of talking and teasing, their codes as comforting as a band-aid on a sore. Neither were finished talking, when Lily abruptly ended the call.
Outside, she heard the sound of a fire engine siren.
Chapter 8
Lily raced over to the window. The siren sounded close-within blocks-but there was no sign of smoke or fire. Still, even through the trees and darkness she could see second-story lights popping on. Others had been awakened by the sound of the fire truck.
Her heart was thudding with dread, but she told herself not to panic.
She told herself that there was no reason to worry this had anything to do with her. That was pretty darned self-centered thinking. Everything wasn’t about her.
Yet she whipped around, started searching for clothes. She’d just yanked a long-sleeved tee over her head when she sensed a sharp white flash of light, followed by a growl that made the whole house shake. Thunder. Lightning close enough to smell the ozone. Seconds later, rain slashed in the west windows, making the curtains dance and shake.
She pushed down the windows, turned and promptly hit her knee on the four-poster in the dark. She found underpants, shorts-though she couldn’t see what color-bent down, groped for her sandals. She could still hear the sirens. Her heart pounded as uncontrollably as a child’s nightmare. She rushed downstairs, almost tripping on the bottom step, and found Louella standing with her cane at the back screen door, wearing a housecoat and pink Crocs.
She’d lit a utility candle, put it in the sink, which illuminated just enough for Lily to find her way across the room.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Louella said. “You’re my only tenant right now. I never mind that. But the house always feels bigger and creakier in a storm. I was worried how close that lightning was. Thought it might have hit the catalpa tree three doors down.”
“Are you worried? Do you have a storm shelter?”
“Heavens no, honey. This is just a storm. It’ll pass. Once that lightning’s moved off to the east, I’ll relax good and well.” But there was worry in her eyes when she looked at Lily. “You heard the sirens?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know what’s going on in our town with these fires, but I have to say, it’s starting to make me uneasy. I was told twice yesterday that I was making a mistake, letting a fire setter rent a room here. Of course, anyone listens to June Ellis should get their head examined. Damn fool woman married the biggest drinker in town, then whines about the mess she’s in. So that’s the kind of judgment she’s got.”
Lily’s heart sank. Louella was staring out at the rain again, not at her. “Louella, do you want me to move?” she asked quietly.
“Lands sake, no. Lordamighty. You didn’t think I’d believe silly talk like that, did you? Give me credit for some brains, honey. I took one look at your face and knew you had a good heart through and through.”
“Thanks.”
“Don’t thank me for being smart. I was born smart. Can’t take credit for it.”
Lily had to smile, but it faded fast. “I don’t want to cause you any trouble-”
“You couldn’t cause me trouble if you tried. I’m a Southern magnolia, sugar. Southern women know how to be strong.” Louella’s gnarled hand circled Lily’s wrist. “But I am worried about you.”
“It’s all right,” Lily reassured her. “There’s no reason to…”
Her voice trailed off when she saw the sheriff’s car pull up to the curb.