“A neurosurgeon!” she exclaimed to one shaky old coot. “How wonderful! But aren’t you the ones who refuse to admit that the significance of computational neurosciences for cognitive theory has been exaggerated?”
He was delighted. “Well, my dear…”
He lasted a second before another groveling fawner shoved in. A Polish shipbuilder, after a graceful interchange about where exactly in Poland he was born, got “Isn’t that near the Niepokalanow monastery? How very original! Don’t they run the only monk-operated fire brigade in Christendom?”
“Why, yes!” He was over the moon. “You must visit—”
A Canadian politician got the next zinger: “How I sympathize with your language predicament. Your Bill 101, the Charter for the French Language, has such reverberations, has it not? Easy for Premier Levesque’s Parti Quebecois government to enact in 1977, but doesn’t guardianship of one language imply suppression of others…
?”
More delight, more awe, while I thought, Christ, I’m out of my league here. She spotted without even looking the emblem of a Papal Order on an Italian merchant’s tiepin. To his effusive greeting—“I greet the most virtuous…”—she responded, “Virtutem verba putes?” adding for us serfs, “You suppose virtue consists merely of words?” The sweet put-down modestly included herself; she could have been yodeling for all any of us cared. Scintillating, wittily, she constantly shifted ground as different businessmen made it through the scrum to grab a word. She was instantly into cinema history for a movie critic: “Why was that makeup artist Maurice Seiderman omitted from the screen credits of Citizen Kane? A rift between him and Orson Welles?” She even captivated a Filipino magnate fresh from Singapore who was compiling a report on Asian tourism.
“You will find that we are not like Singapore, welcoming tourists by the throat,” she said, touching his arm confidingly. “To Hong Kong currency is a blessing, so anyone is welcome.”
“Not paupers,” I muttered aside to Ramone.
“We have our own supply of those, Lovejoy.” Ling Ling smiled at me. I reddened.
Hearing like a bloody bat too.
The thrash went on for an hour while adulation ran amok. Eventually the main group were smoothly given the sailor’s elbow. I dithered, wanting out, but Sim was observant and nasty, and two of those thin goons were hovering ominously by the doorway. We were down to Ling Ling, Sun Sen, Marilyn, Sim, and Dr. Chao.
Sim and Dr. Chao stayed behind as we went through to a subdued alcove in a large nightclub restaurant. Our—well, Ling Ling’s—arrival was a sensation. The applause and exclamations of wonderment were noted with significant glances exchanged amongst the visitors.
The rest of the evening was superfluous. The Triad’s two purposes were accomplished: to impress the guests with the syndicate’s affluence and organization, and to let them in on the fact that Ling Ling belonged.
For myself, I had two purposes of my own. They too were achieved. One, to be absolutely certain that Ling Ling had no divvying gift—she hadn’t even quivered at a delectable gold Renaissance ring worn by the Italian merchant. Two, I had finally established the hierarchy of the Triad: Dr. Chao No. 1; Sun Sen No. 2. Fatty was about No. 3, the lieutenant in charge of local affairs. Sim, through Marilyn, ran the lesser hoodlums, including me. I put Ling Ling as probably co-regent, head of the women.
The meal was about twenty dishes, brought one after the other. Each guest helped himself from the central dish into his own bowl. First the dreaded thousand-year-old egg to herald a pricey occasion, then the succession: shark’s-fin soup, a huge carp cleverly boned and reassembled as new, hot mixed vegetables, “rice birds”—cooked whole in a potatolike vegetable scooped out to accept the poor mites, snake, a duck disturbingly made to a lifelike look after boning and stuffing so your chopsticks met only cooked meat, seafoods with mild elusive tastes and runny sauces, different fruits…
Amid the nosh a light bantering talk went on. Only money, percentages, general stuff.
Not a single antique was mentioned. I got on with the food.
It’s hard not to gorge, but I was starving. To my shame I finished up the lone eater, with other guests jesting away but Ling Ling gently encouraging. She kept pointing out the history of each dish, which historic poet had liked what—she’d somehow sensed my innate queasiness about raw grub and steered clear.
“Finally, millet soup, Lovejoy,” she said when I was replete.
“No more, please.” I was bulging.
“Please. May I insist? There’s a reason…”
If you’ve never tried this trick, have a go. One bowl, reluctantly forced down, miraculously restores you to normal. It’s astonishing. Two minutes and I felt sated but not uncomfortably so. She smiled her approval.
“We love to see appetites, Lovejoy. It is a pleasure to see a man eat so. You have given this poor restaurant great esteem. I am indebted.” Even Marilyn was smiling.
“Oh, ta.” Done something right for once. Oddly, we were given an orange to end with, in a brown paper bag. I felt daft, but took mine because Ling Ling took hers. No coffee, strange to say. And the instant the last dish was done we all rose and said so-long. No after-dinner chat’s the local rule. I was deflected from walking back with anyone in particular by Sun Sen, who asked if I’d accompany him instead. It was a ruse. As soon as the visitors had left, grinning and waving, Sun Sen turned to me and said unsmilingly, “You may go now, Lovejoy.” I wasn’t to talk to the visitors alone. I was narked. What the hell had I been made to go for?
Class dismissed.
16
« ^ »
THE Mologai. The sun shines less in the Mologai, but heat gathers there in the shade and smoke. Steep cramped dwellings, shops oldish. Oddly, smoke pervading the whole area. The streets cling to contours. You clamber up steps from one narrow alleyway to the next, among the stalls. It’s an antique hunter’s paradise—or rather purgatory, because the promise of heaven takes time to realize.
Sweating into dehydration, I stood in Upper Lascar Row and gaped about. God, the Cantonese can use space like the Georgians. In a hundred yards there were as many businesses. Some were no more than a few pots or carvings on trestles under green canvas canopies. Others were crammed into shop fronts. You have to struggle through the mayhem as best you can. A few tourists were battling bravely, and I even saw one couple buying bowls of steaming congee from grub stalls on the lower steps. Braver still. Rescued by a couple of tins of cola, I eeled up Cat Street, conscious of dark doorways, a prickling feeling of being watched in that relative quiet. A lot of people stood about. Eyes seemed stiller, harder.
Yet it was bliss. Delicate chimes of genuine antiques thrilled me here and there. I instantly befriended a luscious wooden scroll box complete with hinges, just less than a couple of centuries old but wonderfully preserved— the elderly stallholder gave me his broadest gold-toothed grin as he recognized my lust. And a brush pot, humble russet wood but sweetly chiming its genuineness. I asked the price of both, and got laughter and nods. I should have recognized this as the start of barter but was hot and edgy by the ominous sense of threat. On the way in, a couple of thin blokes eyed me and strolled after me.
Well, it was broad day. I could just afford the brush pot. Only seven inches high and slightly splayed, it was magic. Conscious that time was passing, I drew breath to say I’d have it, hand in my pocket for my wad, when I noticed a familiar figure within a few feet. The crowd made space around his stubby little frame. Titch, knee-high, staring up at me from his roller-skate trolley. He glanced pointedly at the brush pot, and shook his head.