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Editor's Note:
The amourous frolics at Madame's led occasionally to some very unexpected complications in the outside world. One newcomer to her establishment, Maude Evrington-who was in the bloom of her seventeenth year-evidently did not care for the somewhat unconventional education she was receiving and wrote to her Mama, who, as will be seen from the following, was thereupon forced to put hasty pen to paper to a newfound lover in the absence of her husband, Arnold.
My Darling Edmond,
Our next rendezvous will, I fear, be delayed. To my great surprise I received this morning from Maude a letter to say that she wishes to return home, and this only two weeks after departing for Madame Lorraine's College for Young Ladies in France! I cannot think what has got into Maude, who writes in the most veiled fashion of “unseemly behaviour” there, which I cannot bring myself to believe. Goodness knows what Arnold will say of this on his return from Birmingham, though as you know he is not due to come back for some three weeks. What is to do? I cannot deny my dear daughter her right to return home, and yet I know that when she does she will be all about me and may even wish in all innocence to accompany me when I most desire to meet you. You may well imagine how fretsome I feel about this-and just at the very moment when we have so much time to indulge our love! I can think of no way out of this contretemps and am quite frantic. Dear heart, do write to me immediately and tell me what you think. I am quite sure that Maude is being merely hysterical, which I believe sometimes happens to girls of her age. I am utterly in despair, my love!
Your Adoring Adelaide
My Beloved Adelaide,
Queen of the boudoir and Queen of my heart! Have faith in your Edmond, for he has a solution to this awful contretemps which will otherwise keep us apart. You remember of course the Fortescues whom we met at the Goodwood Races last summer? You are not closely acquainted with them, my love, but I can assure you that they are a couple utterly sympathetic and helpful in such situations. Indeed, I have taken the liberty of speaking to them already and they are most eager to assist us and in the most tactful manner. Having two young sons of their own, they are used to such “hysterics” as Maude is evidently experiencing and would love to take her in hand for a week or two to calm her down and-as they say-bring roses to her cheeks. This, then, is my plan. You will leave a note for Maude to say that you have been called away to the sickbed of your Aunt Miriam, whom, as you casually mentioned to me once, is quite detested by your daughter. Maude will not wish to follow you there in her present mood. But tell me the date of her arrival and I will arrange all with Frank and Nina Fortescue.
Coincidentally-or so it will seem to Maude-they will arrive to visit you on the evening of her arrival, by which time you will already have departed. Maude cannot help but receive them, whereupon all will be well. The Fortescues will comfort and distract her as only they can, for they have already had a little practise among other friends in dealing with fractious young ladies. What say you, my dove? They have the most charming mansion, and there Maude will be as well seen to as any young lady might be, as well as having the company of young friends about her. You may then come to me as freely as you intended to, while Nina will keep us well informed. Make haste to write to me and say but that you agree. I cannot wait for the postman to arrive!
Your Adoring Edmond
My Dearest, Darling,
What a dither of uncertainty all this has put me in, but I am sure you are right. I confess to a sense of unease at so plotting against my own dear daughter, yet as you say she will be in good hands for a few weeks while I shall be in the arms of my beloved! Maude arrives on Thursday. My note to her, which I shall leave here, is already penned, so you may gauge from that my impatience to come to you. I trust, though, you will not think me utterly wanton in so acting. I know that you have frequently asked me to write to you such naughty things as we have said to one another during the deliriums of our passion, but I could never bring myself to. Do you think me wayward for that? I have learned all from you, I swear. You are the first-the very first-to whom I have lowered my drawers in daylight (oh, I blush to write it!), and you, wicked darling, declaring what a “beautiful muff and lustrous thighs” I have.
There, you see, I am capable of writing such things, though I truly think myself a loose woman in doing so. I know you will say otherwise, and I am hopeful of being very convinced! So do my thoughts run away with me. Is not my bottom too fat? I have gazed at it often enough these past few days-glancing over my shoulder into my mirror-and have thought of you. I blush to think that I have let you do it to me that way, and yet you are so masterful that I positively have no resistance to you. I shall be in your arms, I swear, within an hour of your receiving this.
Your Ever Loving Adelaide
Editor's Note:
Upon receiving this, Edmond wrote the following to the Fortescues and so revealed himself in a light that many will think utterly improper and which would certainly have put Adelaide into quite a tizzy had she known about it. In the light of future events and of her own “education,” perhaps it was better that she did not.
My Dear Nina,
In your husbands temporary absence, I write to you to say that the net is cast and the bait taken, my pet!
Maude-a most curvaceous young creature whom you will adore-waits unknowingly for your visit on Thursday. Her dear Mama will meanwhile be with me and enjoying all the fruits of libertine desire to which she has set herself. I am forever grateful to you for having set her in my sights, for she is as toothsome a female as one could wish to meet and is already learning many of the delights of Priapus which Arnold never appears to have taught her. She has a superb bottom for fucking and has already learned to take my cock well up her there, was fretful at first about it but now enjoys it thoroughly. I shall introduce her into your entourage, my sweet, at the right moment, though she has little idea of that as yet. As to Maude, I have told Adelaide that you intend to put roses into her cheeks, but cautiously omitted to say that they are likely to be her nether ones!
Madam Lorraine's methods are better known to you and I than to the more innocent Adelaide, who well believes that Arnold sent their dear daughter there to improve her French. More likely that she will have learned French kissing! I rely on you entirely to handle the wayward girl as you will and to obviate such prudery as you will undoubtedly find in her. That “gentle firmness” for which you are renowned will surely win the day!
Your admiring and grateful Edmond
My Dear Edmond,
It is not you who should thank me but the other way around! Maude is all that you described and more. What perfectly delightful titties she has-such pumpkins! She was all a-dither, of course, at our arrival, but in the absence of her brothers and sisters was by no means displeased to find herself in our company. A few glasses of some fine port soon persuaded her that with her Mama “gone to her Aunt's,” she would find herself in better company at our house, and so it has turned out. I will not bore you with all the preliminaries. It appears that there are VERY naughty goings-on indeed at the college and that a girl who has not learned how to tongue another pupil's pussy in her first week is considered a failure! Yes, my dear, it is as advanced as that-though I suspect you well knew it. The dear girl was loath to tell me all that she did, but I soon persuaded it out of her while Frank tactfully absented himself.
When she spoke distastefully of French kissing, which she said she refused to try, I pretended amazement. Seated with her on a sofa and with my arm comfortingly about her shoulders, I told her that all the very best people did it nowadays and that it was considered quite the thing. At this, of course, Maude expressed amazement, though at the same time could not bring herself to distrust me, which I much relied upon. Surely I did not do it, she asked. “My little dear, my pet, how else?” I replied artlessly and raised my chin as though to show her. At this she giggled and would have hidden her face.