“Don’t you want to hear about the crocodiles?” I asked, somewhat hurt.
“Not right now. What do you think about the camp?”
“We may need to fire Cassidy. She didn’t even try to protect me.”
Caryn cupped her face in her hands and rubbed her temples. Mom did that sometimes.
“Tell me about the crocodile,” Caryn said.
“It was crocodiles …” I began.
I told her about what happened. They let me see it in playback, and it was dramatic. Watching Kimberly face-plant was priceless. All I can say is you could never get a second shot of that, and we were lucky it came out well. Kimberly might get an Academy Award for her portrayal of a screaming girl who sees live crocodiles coming after her. She was very convincing, and I had claw marks on my neck to prove it. I thought she did a better job than that Jurassic Park actress who ran from the dinosaurs in high heels.
I might need to work on my running technique, but my excuse was I had a frightened girl wrapped around me.
Caryn thought I was full of it until she called Cassidy and confirmed my adventure. Then she was concerned, but not about what I would have thought.
“You don’t expect me to call your mom and tell her about this, do you?”
I hadn’t thought of that.
“Maybe she could just see it in the movie,” I suggested.
“You’re the boss.”
I gave her a dubious look because that never seemed to be the case unless it was something she wanted.
◊◊◊
Chapter 4 – Balancing Act Tuesday May 24
Since Kimberly had quit, I got the day off. The writers were frantically working to write her out of the movie.
After I ran for distance, I did my speed work. Paul got the honor of running with me, but he begged off the speed drills. I then had Cassidy work with me on my outfield exercises. I worked up a good sweat in the heat and humidity. The good news was the steam-bath air kept you loose.
When I finished, I decided to relax by the pool. Cassidy joined me because Kimberly had flown out last night, and Cassidy no longer had to help watch her. After our swim, we caught some rays and simply relaxed. I needed some downtime, just doing nothing for a while.
“Do you really think I have girlfriends?” I asked her.
“You’re kidding, right?” Cassidy asked.
“No, I’m trying to be serious. What you said has me worried. I never meant to lead anyone on, and I don’t want to hurt anyone either. I thought we were just dating and hanging out as friends,” I said.
“Be honest with yourself. Do you have feelings for them?” Cassidy asked.
“Well, of course I do. I love each of them in their own way. That doesn’t mean that I’m in love with any of them, though. To be honest, I don’t believe I’ve ever been in love before. Have you?”
“I thought I was in love with you when I first arrived at Lincoln High, but I learned that was more infatuation than love. I really liked both Jim and Wolf. The closest I ever got was with Jeff. I miss him so much sometimes. He was such a sweet boy, and I knew he was totally in love with me,” Cassidy shared.
We were both quiet for a few minutes as we remembered Jeff.
“I thought I loved Tracy, and I was pretty sure I loved Tami, but looking back on it, I’m not so certain. Why don’t I ever have any luck with girls? I can do almost anything else but figure out how to make a relationship work.”
“You really are a ‘stupid boy.’ Since I’ve come to Lincoln High, I’ve watched you do this incredible balancing act as you’ve juggled numerous girls. They all love you, but you can’t seem to get out of your own way to see it.”
“Then why can’t I ever seem to make it work? When I find someone I like, they either go crazy, like someone else, want to change me, or are afraid to commit. What’s wrong with me?” I asked.
“If you ask me, you put too much pressure on it. Your ideal of what a girlfriend is leads to always-and-forever. I don’t know of any girl our age who’s ready for that level of commitment. I expect they all ran because they didn’t feel like they could measure up to what you want. In my case, I know I’m not ready for it,” Cassidy said.
“Is that why you won’t date me?” I asked.
“Why would I want to be one of many?”
“If I ever get a girlfriend, there won’t be any others.”
“Don’t you think Halle, Zoe, Brook, and Pam know that? Why do you think they’ve never tried to pin you down? They all know if you decided on just one of them, it might not be them, and they’d be on the outside looking in.”
“Tracy has been pushing for me to find one,” I admitted.
“Tracy’s a crazy bitch who loves you to death,” she said and saw the shocked look on my face. “I mean crazy in the best possible way. Tracy would do anything for you and seems to believe you’ve finally gotten past your infatuation with Tami and are ready for more in your life.
“I expect if you talked to any of your girls, they’d probably agree that you’re in a much better place now than you were last fall. Believe me, no one wanted to be your rebound girl. Then everything sort of fell into place, and they worked it out so they could all date you. Pam almost screwed it up,” Cassidy said.
“By getting pregnant?” I asked.
“They were all afraid that would be a game-changer. I think if her dad hadn’t gone all psycho on you, the two of you might have locked it down. We all know what Greg did with Angie, and I don’t believe he loved her near as much as you love Pam.”
It was fascinating to hear how Cassidy viewed my world. It was apparent that the girls had talked to her about it. I never realized they were worried about Pam and me getting together. I guess the real question was, did I want anything to change? Did I want to finally pick a girlfriend? Did the romantic in me want an exclusive relationship?
If I asked Mr. Happy, he would tell me absolutely not. Of course, if he were in charge, I would be like Zak and trying to get laid three times a day. The more I thought about it, the more I realized Cassidy was right. I’d been doing a balancing act between commitment and being a horndog. I’d found a middle ground with dating.
“Why don’t we go back to my room and spend the day in bed? I bet I could make you decide that you were my one and only,” I teased Cassidy.
“I’m not sure you could do it, but I’d be willing to give it a try.”
“It sounds like you’re just horny,” I teased.
“Maybe.”
I wasn’t sure if she was serious, so I stood up. Cassidy gave me a little smile and got up as well.
“Are we doing this?” I asked.
“Shut up and take me upstairs,” she ordered.
◊◊◊
It turned out my idea of a day in bed and Cassidy’s were very different. First, I had to talk to her, do her nails, and give her a massage. If this was what girls did on sleepovers, count me out. Then she wanted us to do facials. The sad part was she pointed out I had everything we needed. I tried to defend myself by saying Adrienne made me get the stuff and use it, but Cassidy called me a girl.
After that, we finally got naked and took a lousy shower so we could wash our hair and use my conditioner. I offered a sexier version, but she offered to make me cry, so I behaved.
Cassidy then made me do her makeup. Tracy, who was now dead to me, had told the girls about me doing her makeup when she was depressed. Just because I picked up some skills while modeling, that didn’t give me expert status. But when we were done, Cassidy did look good.
Cassidy told me she was going to her room to put on dressier clothes because I was taking her out. As I finished getting dressed, I got a call on the room phone.
“Mr. Dawson, your car is here,” the front desk said.
“Please tell them I’ll be right down.”
I walked down the hall and knocked on Cassidy’s door. She was ready, and she looked great. When we got downstairs, I was in for a revelation. My date tonight wasn’t Cassidy, it was Sarita. With her was Luis. We took a cab to Paz’s place. Once we were seated, Paz came out to greet us. This time it was Luis’s turn to be made fun of.