The Marines had arranged transport, and we were whisked in through the gate as if we were VIPs. We were taken to an office building and shown to a conference room. In walked a man who I could tell bothered Cassidy. He introduced himself as Major Duckworth, US Army, from the Public Affairs Office. He’d been brought in just for me. They called him away for a moment, which gave me a chance to talk to Cassidy.
“I take it you don’t like him?”
“He’s the typical idiot my dad hated. He’ll never see any action and is more a political animal than military. It’s a Marine thing,” she said in explanation.
“How do I act? Do I salute?” I teased her.
“That’s only with me. Just treat them like you do my dad; you’re a civilian.”
“So, I yell at him,” I said, nodding.
It’s good that I have catlike reflexes. I suspected Cassidy was worried I’d embarrass her twice in one day.
◊◊◊
Before dinner, Stars and Stripes interviewed me. The interview was primarily focused on my films and why I was in Japan. They also wanted to talk about football and baseball. But I told them I had to separate sports interviews from movie and modeling interviews to stay on the NCAA’s good side. We agreed to talk about sports after dinner.
I was then taken to Matthew C. Perry High School, where they were holding an assembly and expecting me to give a speech. I glared at Cassidy, who played innocent. It was a good thing I wasn’t shy.
“I was told about an hour ago I had the privilege of visiting you all today. I bet you had just about as much notice that I’d be here.”
“As a matter of fact, we planned for some students from Noda Gakuen High School in Yamaguchi City to share their experience in their cultural exchange program,” the principal explained. “They’ve had several of their students attend here to learn about American culture. Those students are here to speak to this combined assembly. We thought having an American movie star would help with that exchange.”
“Where are the students from Noda Gakuen?” I asked in Japanese, or more likely asked where the restroom was.
They were all sitting together.
“How are we supposed to exchange if we don’t sit with them? I want everyone to stand up and get them mixed in. Then I want you to take a minute and introduce yourselves to them,” I said, and everyone stared at me.
I got up and walked to the edge of the stage.
“Get your butts up and move!”
That had the desired effect. They just needed the right attitude adjustment. Once everyone quieted down, I opened it up to questions. They were all ones I’d answered a hundred times. Finally, the principal took pity on me and let me go to dinner.
I did have one question. Why were they in school this time of year? The principal explained that this was an optional summer school session, but that many of the students took it because they moved often and needed to catch up. The other reason was they’d set it up as a summer camp of sorts where they had all kinds of activities. In some ways, it sounded like our voluntary workout program, but with more structure. A popular summer class was flight lessons.
I sat with a group of pilots who were part of a Marine attack squadron. They flew jets that had multiple functions, including jamming and surveillance gathering.
“Would it be possible to get a ride-along? I would love to experience flying in a combat jet.”
If they want you to do some PR, the least they could do was feed my adrenaline junkie. Unfortunately, they said they had a policy. I didn’t buy it, but they weren’t budging.
After we met the officers, we went with Major Duckworth and met with the Stars and Stripes reporter a second time so we could talk sports. From his questions, it was apparent he’d done an internet search on me while Cassidy and I did our PR work. He really liked the Baseball USA angle, as he thought it would play well to his military audience.
Major Duckworth asked if I would be willing to do this at other bases. I told him I would consider it once I got back to the States, but my schedule was packed while I was here.
They took us back to our hotel.
◊◊◊
I’d gotten a suite here so that everyone would have a place to hang out. When I got back, Megan and Hana each grabbed an arm.
“You two have had him long enough. We get him tonight,” Megan announced to Brook and Cassidy.
Brook just rolled her eyes. It looked like they’d discussed this.
“Let me hit the little boys’ room, and we’ll go wherever you two want,” I assured them.
I came back out.
“So, what’s it going to be, ladies?” I asked.
“Karaoke,” Hana announced.
Both Cassidy and Brook stifled laughs because they knew how I felt about singing in public. Kent was no help.
“I hear that’s big here. I’d like to go.”
Saul said he had to work, which I didn’t believe for a second. Cassidy wanted to take Brook and show her some of her childhood haunts. Paul hadn’t gotten extra security for Iwakuni because we hadn’t had any problems. He decided he would be enough for tonight.
◊◊◊
Hana had picked out a place called Karaoke-kan, as it was a national chain. She said her cousins had recommended it as being the most fun. I was expecting a bar that offered karaoke as its primary entertainment. We entered a beautiful lobby and found that you rented a room by the hour. You could order food and drink. Hana and Megan also ordered costumes. It seems Japanese people like to get dressed up.
“I think we need to do shots if we’re going to sing,” Kent suggested.
“That is the first sane thing anyone has said since we got here. I think mass quantities of beer are called for,” I suggested.
Once we got to the room, we found it furnished with a couple tables that were close to the floor and padded mats to sit on. In the corner, there were two screens and microphones. Paul pointed out that the girls had paid to have the session recorded, and there were cameras all over the room. This had YouTube written all over it.
Instead of putting up a fuss, I decided that I’d promised Megan a trip, and would fulfill my end of the bargain. She was, after all, the one who pointed out what a dirtbag Brandon was. Kent had a good idea, and I poured myself an Absolute Citron on the rocks. They’d bought a bottle, and I could tell it was in danger of being emptied before too long. Paul was designated the babysitter when I did my second one. Stepping up to the machine, I browsed their song catalog. I figured if I went first, I’d get the first pick. I decided on an old classic, Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd.
As much as I might not want to admit it, I was having fun. Kent and Hana did Drunk in Love by Jay-Z and Beyoncé. Then Megan floored us. The girl could sing. She was hiding a huge voice in her little body, and she slew (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman by Aretha Franklin.
Knowing we were outclassed, the rest of us did a shot, declaring Megan the winner. If I didn’t have the video to prove it, I couldn’t make the following claim: when I get drunk, I can actually sing. With my deep voice, I killed some Elvis and Barry White songs. I tore up Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-A-Lot.
During the night, everyone tried on the different costumes the girls had picked out. We even got Paul to put on a pimp hat. Things got a little hot when the girls put on schoolgirl uniforms and sang … Baby One More Time by Britney Spears. When they were done, I found Megan on my lap while Hana sat on Kent’s.
Thankfully, Paul was there, or we might have done something embarrassing on camera. He rounded us up, made sure he grabbed the video, and then took us back to the hotel.
◊◊◊ Thursday July 7
Cassidy woke me up again.
“Get up, get up, get up!” she said, poking me in the ribs, and then noticed I wasn’t alone.