His head lifted. Blinding pain and regret flared up. It was fierce in his eyes as he said, “I was relieved because I didn’t have to stop him—” His voice broke as guilt flooded him.
His head lowered. His eyes left mine, but I reached up. I caught the side of his face, and I made him look at me again. Our eyes met, and I saw a stark need for something was there, inside of him. I couldn’t place it, but it struck deep inside me, as if I could heal him like he’d allowed me to heal, too.
“Finish it.” Please.
“He hurt my sister, and I couldn’t make him pay for it. If he hurt you, too, I couldn’t have lived with it. Any other girl…” He looked away again.
I didn’t let him. I made him look at me, my fingers sinking into his skin.
“There’s something about you.” His eyes rounded, looking in wonderment at me now. “I don’t know what it is. I felt it back then. I didn’t care about other girls, even the girls in my group. They were all the same. People just hurt people. I didn’t care. But when he started with you, I cared. I cared too much. I couldn’t let him hurt you, but it meant going against my father and my family. I would’ve lost them. If I said or did anything, I would’ve been exiled from them.”
Kian went to my house that day, knowing what would happen. “They would’ve kicked you out?”
He nodded, his head moving against my hand. “I shouldn’t have given a damn, but you broke up with him, and I was so fucking relieved that I wouldn’t have to fight my father. Justin started bragging again. He was going to wine and dine you and take you to the party that next weekend. He was going to finish what he’d started. Those were his words.”
I winced, but that sounded like my asshole ex-boyfriend. My would-have-been rapist.
“Like I said before, he was going to your house that day to ask you. I wanted to tell you not to go out with him. I didn’t know if he’d already be there. I didn’t know what I would be walking into, but I had to stop him. You couldn’t get hurt.” He shook his head, saying to himself, “Not you.”
I didn’t know what to feel. So many emotions were going through me—relief, gratefulness, anger, pain. But there were others, ones I didn’t want to name. So, I didn’t.
I moved, pressing my lips to his.
It was a soft kiss, almost like our first one, but this one was different. There was something new about it, something tender. Warmth swept through me, filling every part of my body, and it pushed all those other emotions out. It was just us, just this touch. That was the only thing that mattered.
And, my God, I wanted more.
I moved closer to him and opened my mouth. He took over then. His hand held me still, and he moved his head, his mouth coming to mine. He wanted more. His mouth ground on mine, but I wanted it. My body was thirsting for it.
Jordan thought this was just about sex. It wasn’t.
As I took over the kiss and guided her around, switching our positions, I knew this was so much more.
I hadn’t been lying when I told her about Justin. He was an animal, and he deserved to be put down. I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t do anything that I wanted. People got hurt. They remained hurt, and the people who did it, the ones who hurt them, would always walk free. That was all I saw time and time again. Hearing Justin, knowing what he was going to do, I couldn’t keep quiet any longer.
And now—feeling Jordan beneath me, her mouth arched upward, moving against mine—it was worth it. Everything had been worth it.
I felt more for her than she was ready to hear.
Feeling it now, feeling that emotion and that need to possess her in so many ways, I started to tremble. I wanted to carry her to bed, rip her clothes off, and make her forget any other person’s touch. I wanted to be imprinted on her, so no one would touch her again. I’d always be there. I’d be in the back of her mind. When another’s hands reached for her, she’d feel mine instead. When someone else pressed her into the bed, it’d be my presence haunting her.
I wanted her.
I had for so long.
If Justin had been there, if he’d been hurting her, I would’ve done the same to him as I had with Edmund. Nothing and no one would hurt Jordan. She didn’t realize it, but she’d never feel suffering again. I wouldn’t allow it—whether I was with her or not.
But, right now, having her in my arms, I never wanted this to end. I wanted to take her over and over again. I wanted to make her come again and again, for as long as she would let me.
Thinking about it, feeling the need sweeping up and nearly choking me, I moved her against the wall.
The back of her head rested there, and then her body followed until she was completely glued between the wall and me. There was no escaping. She was mine. She reached up, and her hand slid around my neck. She began to pull down, and at the same time, her body moved up. I bent and grasped the back of her leg. She lifted herself with me, and her legs wound around my waist.
I could touch her now. My fingers could go between us and undo her jeans, and I could slide right in. But I held back. I wanted to savor this, and I wanted her to relish this.
As her body was rippling with need, her mouth never leaving mine, my fingers went underneath her shirt. One remained on her thigh, even though I didn’t have to hold her in place. She wasn’t leaving me. My other eased over her skin, up the side of her back, and she bucked. Her body jolted, and a moan left her as her legs tightened even more around my waist.
She tried to go higher, her body moving against mine.
I pulled back and rested my forehead to hers. We were both panting. Our pulses were racing.
Holding her gaze, I said simply, “I want to be with you.”
Her eyes darkened.
Those contacts—I wanted them off. I wanted to see the beautiful eyes that she’d been hiding from the world. They bewitched Edmund. I almost couldn’t blame him. She never knew the power she had. She thought she was a nobody, but she was the somebody everyone wanted.
Justin claimed her first. That was his mistake. I would’ve taken her, no matter who might have tried to stop me. But I held her now. I was claiming her now. I didn’t think I could give her up, not anymore—not after holding her or touching her and not after I would be inside her.
My thumb rested on her bottom lip.
She gasped from the touch, her eyes clinging to mine, and she nodded. She swallowed and then murmured, “I want you, too.”
I stood back from the wall, holding her to me, and I carried her to the bedroom.
Setting her down onto the bed, she rose to her knees. We paused for a split second. I needed to make sure this was what she wanted. I didn’t know what she was searching for, but her eyes were raking mine. She was looking inside me, maybe for the same reason.
I was there. I was on board. I more than wanted this.
Lifting a hand, I cupped the side of her face to make sure she felt the same.
It appeared. Any of her hesitation slid away, and in its place was the same need that was inside of me. I couldn’t wait any longer after that.
I became lost in her touch as my mouth bent down to hers. Her scent, how soft her skin was, how she felt beneath me while writhing for more—it would all become burned in my memory. I never wanted to forget this.
I was hers. Whether she realized it or not, I was giving all of myself to her right now.
As I slid inside her, I watched how she reveled in the sensations. I’d thought she would close her eyes, but she didn’t. She looked up at me. There were no walls between us. I let mine down.