“No, let me finish. I never had to seduce the women, they did it all. After my father died a couple years ago, I went home and my sister read me the riot act. She was tired of my behaviour and pointed out I was acting like a prick. Along with Matt and a couple buddies, I realised I was trying to keep my past bottled up.”
He took a deep breath before he continued. He was about to share with her more than he did with most people.
“You know Matt and I were in the military. That’s what I use as background for my books.” She nodded.
“What you don’t know is that sometimes I still have nightmares. After I wrote my first book, they got worse. I used the alcohol and women so I wouldn’t have to think about what happened while we were overseas.”
He ran a hand through his hair, trying to figure out how to best explain.
“On my next book tour, I did things different. I no longer let myself be seduced…well, until you,” he told her as he rested his hands on her knees. He just had to hold her, to connect in that small way to remain calm.
“I…”
“It doesn’t matter, Lacey. I said things to you before to hurt you, and I know I did. I’m sorry.” Lacey nodded, but he continued before she could speak.
“It hurt to find out that you were like all the rest.” he told her, still holding onto her.
Lacey only stared at Brent after he made the last statement. It took her several minutes to find her voice.
“I’m like the rest of them?” she managed to croak out.
He nodded and smiled. “It gave me a bad moment, and I acted horrible. Please forgive me?” Lacey couldn’t believe her ears. “I…you…” She jumped up, knocking him back from her. “You arrogant asshole!”
Clearly confused, Brent stood and raised his hands. “What? Wait!”
“No, you wait!” She was almost screaming. “I may have set out to seduce you, but I wasn’t just another woman. I was under the impression we were friends. Obviously I was wrong, and let me tell you, I deeply regret it.” That wasn’t completely true, but he didn’t need to know that. This was worse than using her for sex, this was…telling her she was no better than any other bimbo he had been with.
Brent just stared at Lacey as she stood arms crossed over her chest, glaring at him. “I think you misunderstood me.”
“You know, Brent, I don’t think that I did. I think that you are an arrogant bastard who doesn’t know what he wants, and I want you to leave my room.” Her voice trembled but she stood her ground. She was more than furious. She was insulted and disgusted with both herself and him.
He looked at her like she was crazy, his mouth was open and his eyes huge. It would almost be funny if she didn’t feel like crying and punching him.
“Hey, this isn’t my fault!” he protested
“Three months! Three months you had the opportunity to act like a man and not an asshole. Then when you see me, you take me up to your room, repeat the mistake, and then tell me I’m like every other woman you’ve ever had.”
“I didn’t mean it like that!”
“I really don’t care how you meant it!” She continued to rant at him. “Just get out and leave me alone.” He had to get out. Now. Lacey wasn’t sure how much longer she could hold back her tears. Once again, she pledged to herself that he wouldn’t see her cry. She really was stupid—she didn’t know Brent at all.
He stood for several minutes just staring at her before he turned and left her room. He didn’t see her drop to the bed, crying as the door closed, cursing both of them as fools.
Chapter Four
Making a quick stop in his room, Brent changed clothes before heading downstairs to the hotel’s gym.
He had so much frustration and anger in him, he needed some way to work it out or he’d head back up and throttle Lacey.
Going straight to the weights, he positioned himself on the bench and emptied his mind, ready to let the burn and sweat take him away. He worked for ten minutes, punishing his body so he didn’t have to think about Lacey and what she had said.
He heard a long, low whistle and looked up, his eyes travelling to the other figure in the gym.
He shouldn’t have been surprised to see Matt leaning against a wall, his arms crossed over his chest watching Brent with what could only be considered amusement.
“What?” he snapped at his friend.
Matt pushed away from the wall and grabbed a towel from a shelf before crossing the room. He tossed the towel at Brent and shook his head.
“So how’d it go?” Matt asked with a knowing smile.
“Great. Wonderful,” he answered sarcastically, annoyed at the interruption of his work out. He didn’t want to see anyone right then. He wanted to lose himself in the pain of exercise so he didn’t have to think about Lacey.
Matt nodded. “I can see that.”
Brent growled and his friend held his hands up.
“Hey, man, I was just passing by. Saw you in here intent on punishing yourself and thought you might want to talk.”
“Talk?” Brent laughed bitterly. “Why would I want to talk? I tried to talk to Lacey, and all that got me was her yelling and telling me to get out of her room,” he replied, saying more than he wanted. But Matt had always been able to break through Brent’s defences. He was the most compassionate man Brent had ever met.
Matt frowned and scratched the stubble growing out on his chin. “Huh? Well, let’s see where you went wrong.”
“I didn’t go wrong. She’s impossible. I explained to her about the drinking and gambling and other women and she yelled at me.” Brent shook his head.
“What exactly did she say?”
“I don’t know! She just started yelling about not being like the other women.”
“Well, she’s not like the others.”
“I know that!” Brent’s voice rose.
“Did you tell her that?” Matt kept his voice calm.
“Of course…” He paused. Had he told her that? He had tried, but she wouldn’t listen. “Doesn’t matter,” Brent stated before he stomped over to the treadmill.
“It does matter if you’re down here instead of upstairs with the woman you care about,” Brent told him as he sat at one of the empty benches.
Brent started the treadmill, hoping it would wear him out and allow him to sleep. He wasn’t sure where he had gone wrong with Lacey. He’d been honest with her, and that hadn’t worked.
What else could he do?
“So, now what?” His friend’s voice broke into his thoughts.
“I finish the convention then go see the progress on my house,” Brent informed him and thought that sounded like a decent plan.
A friend of theirs and fellow special forces team member, Adam Butler, had taken the position of sheriff of a small town that did most of their business in the summer with rental houses and tourists. Another friend and old team member, Jake Summers, had already moved there and was now building houses for the rest of the team. Matt and Cara’s house had just been completed, and now Brent’s house was in the works. It was something he was looking forward to.
“Seems a shame to have that big house built and have no one to share it with,” Matt said.
Brent laughed but continued to run on the machine. “That was rough.” Matt only grinned at his friend. “Still true. You know Lacey is perfect for you.” Brent slammed his hand down and turned off the machine. “I tried. It’s over.” Stepping off the treadmill, he grabbed the towel Matt had thrown at him earlier. He wiped the sweat off his face then looked up. “I don’t plan on opening myself up again, to anyone.” Matt frowned at him, but Brent didn’t elaborate. He couldn’t tell his oldest friend that he knew Lacey belonged with him. That, for the first time in his life, he was in love. He had screwed up, and no matter how he tried to fix it, he didn’t see the dream of Lacey in his life coming true.