“I ain’t much on compliments. But you’re pretty, and that’s a fact. I guess you’re about the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen. Especially when you’re riled.”
“Is that why you continue to go out of your way to annoy me?”
“I expect. Come here.”
She smoothed down her skirt. “I will not.”
He rose slowly. “You’re ornery, too. Can’t figure why it appeals to me.” He dragged her to him. After a moment’s feigned struggle, she laughed up at him. “I’ll have to remember to stay ornery and annoyed, then.”
He said nothing. The way she’d looked up at him had knocked the breath out of his body. He pulled her closer, holding on, wishing. Content, Sarah nuzzled his shoulder. Before he could draw her back, she framed his face with her hands and brushed her lips over his.
“You’re still tying me up in knots,” he muttered.
“That’s good. I don’t intend to stop.”
He stepped back, then gripped her hands with his.
“Which one did he kiss?”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Carlson.” She gave a surprised gasp when his fingers tightened on hers. “Which hand did he kiss?”
Sarah kept her eyes on his. “Both.”
She watched the fury come then, and was amazed at how quickly, how completely, he masked it. But it was still there. She could feel it rippling through him.
“Jake-”
He shook his head. Then, in a gesture that left her limp, he brought her hands to his lips. Then he dropped them, obviously uncomfortable, and dug his own hands into his pockets.
“I don’t want you to let him do it again.”
“I won’t.”
Her response should have relaxed him, but his tension doubled. “Just like that?”
“Yes, just like that.”
He turned away and began to pace. Her brow lifted. She realized she’d never before seen him make an unnecessary movement. If he took a step, it was to go toward or away.
“I’ve got no right.” There was fury in his voice. The same kind she heard outside the tent the night before. In contrast, hers was soft and soothing. “You have every right. The only right. I’m in love with you.”
Now he didn’t move at all. He froze as a man might when he heard a trigger cocked at the back of his head. She simply waited, her hands folded at her waist, her eyes calm and clear.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” he managed at last.
“Of course I do, and so do you.” With her eyes on his, she walked to him. “Do you think I could have been with you as I was last night, this morning, if I didn’t love you?”
He stepped back before she could touch him. It had been so long since he’d been loved that he’d forgotten what it could feel like. It filled him like a river, and its currents were strong.
“I’ve got nothing for you, Sarah. Nothing.”
“Yourself.” She reached a hand to his cheek. “I’m not asking for anything.”
“You’re mixing up what happened last night with-”
“With what?” she challenged. “Do you think because you were the first man that I don’t know the difference between love and…lust? Can you tell me it’s been like that for you before, with anyone? Can you?”
No, he couldn’t. And he couldn’t tell her it would never be that way with anyone but her. “Lucius will be back soon,” he said instead. “I’ll go down and get the water you wanted before I leave.”
And that was all? she thought. Damn him for turning his back on her again. He didn’t believe her, she thought. He thought she was just being foolish and romantic… But no, no, that wasn’t right, she realized. That wasn’t it at all.
It came to her abruptly and with crystalline clarity. He did believe her, and that was why he had turned away. He was as frightened and confused by her love as she -had been by the land. It was just as foreign to him. Just as difficult to understand and accept. She could change that. Taking a long, cleansing breath, she turned to her dishes. She could change that in the same way she had changed herself. She embraced the land now, called it her own. One day he would do the same with her.
She heard the door open again, and she turned, smiling.
“Jake-”
But it was Burt Donley who filled the doorway.
Chapter Eleven
“Where’s Redman?”
Panic came first, and it showed in her wide, wild eyes. She was still holding the skillet, and she had one mad thought of heaving it at his head. But his hand was curled over the butt of his gun. She saw in his eyes what she had never seen in Jake’s, what she realized she’d never seen in any man’s, not even in those of the Apache who had kidnapped her. A desire, even an eagerness, to kill.
He stepped inside, and through the thickness of his beard she saw that he was smiling. “I asked you, Where’s Redman?”
“He’s not here.” It surprised her how calm a voice could sound even when a heart was pounding. She had a man to protect. The man she loved. “I don’t believe I asked you in.”
His smile widened into a grin. “You ain’t going to tell me he brought you all the way out here last night and then left a pretty thing like you all alone?”
She was terrified Jake would come back. And terrified he wouldn’t. She had no choice but to hold her ground. “I’m not telling you anything. But as you can see, I’m alone.”
“I can see that, real plain. Funny, ‘cause his horse is in town and he ain’t.” He picked up a biscuit from the bowl on the table with his wide, blunt-edged fingers, studied it, then bit in. “Word is he spends time out here.”
“Mr. Redman occasionally visits. I’ll be sure to tell him you were looking for him, if and when I see him.” “You do that. You be sure and do that.” He took another bite, chewing slowly, watching her.
“Good day, then.”
But he didn’t leave. He only walked closer.
“You’re prettier than I recollect.”
She moistened her lips, knowing they were trembling.
“I don’t believe we’ve met.”
“No, but I’ve seen you.” She strained backward when he put a hand to her hair. “You don’t favor your pa none.”
“You’ll have to excuse me.” She tried to step to the side, but he blocked her.
“He sure did set some store by you. A man can see why.” He pushed the rest of the biscuit into his mouth, chewing as he reached down to toy with the small bow at her collar. “Too bad he got himself killed over that mine and left you orphaned. Smart man would’ve kept himself alive. Smart man would’ve seen the sense in that.”
She shifted again, and was again blocked. “He could hardly be blamed for an accident.”
“Maybe we’ll talk about that later.” Enjoying her trembling, he tugged the little bow loose. “You look smarter than your pa was.”
Lafitte burst in, snarling. Donley had his hand on the butt of his gun when Sarah grabbed his arm. “No, please. He’s hardly more than a puppy.” Moving quickly, she gathered the growling dog up. “There’s no need for you to hurt him. He’s harmless.”
“Donley likes killing harmless things.” Jake spoke from the doorway. The men stood ten feet apart, Jake backed by sun, Donley by shadow. “There was a man in Laramie-more of a boy, really. Daniel Little Deer was harmless, wasn’t he, Donley?”
“He was a breed.” Donley’s teeth gleamed through his beard. “I don’t think no more of killing a breed than a sick horse.”
“And it’s easier when it’s back-shooting.”
“I ain’t shooting at your back, Redman.”
“Move aside, Sarah.”
“Jake, please-”
“Move aside.” He was over the sick fear he’d felt when he’d seen Donley’s horse outside the house. He was cold, killing-cold. His guns hung low on his hips, and his hands were limber and ready.
Donley shifted, settling his weight evenly. “I’ve waited a long time for this.”
“Some of us get lucky,” Jake murmured, “and wait a long time to die.”