Kobayashi laughed aloud.
“The great pretender. I can’t believe it. I’m no match for you, Mrs. T.”
“You’re the one who’s pretending.”
“Fine, have it your way. In any event, I had no idea you were so gifted. Now I finally understand. It explains Tsuda changing the way he has. I thought it was strange.”
O-Nobu declined to engage. But neither did she betray distress in her face. She struggled to appear unruffled, amiable even. Kobayashi boldly advanced another step.
“The Fujiis are all surprised, too.”
“At what?”
At mention of Fujii, O-Nobu had immediately turned her small eyes on her companion. Knowing she was being lured into a trap, she was unable nevertheless not to respond with the question.
“At your skill. At the miraculous skill that allows you to you hold Tsuda in the palm of your hand and do with him as you wish.”
He was too blunt. But his bluntness appeared to be half playful. There was no amusement in O-Nobu’s reply.
“I see. Do I have such power? It never felt that way to me, but if Aunt and Uncle Fujii do me the honor of saying so, goodness, it must be true.”
“It is true. I can see it and so can anyone, because it’s really there.”
“You’re too kind.”
The words conveyed unmistakable derision and an echo of bitterness that appeared to be beyond anything Kobayashi was expecting. He spoke again at once as if to console her.
“I can imagine you’re not aware of your influence on Tsuda-kun because you didn’t know him before your marriage.”
“I certainly did know him before we were married.”
“But you didn’t know him before that.”
“Obviously not.”
“But I’ve known him all along.”
In this manner the conversation finally turned back to Tsuda’s past.
[84]
ACCESSING HER husband’s domain at a time when he was still unknown to her was hugely interesting to O-Nobu. She prepared eagerly to attend Kobayashi. But when he began to speak, his stories were inconclusive. And when they were heading toward something of importance, he abbreviated them. For example, he touched on a scene when the two of them had been stopped at a police checkpoint in the middle of the night but left blurred any account of where they might have been until that late hour. When O-Nobu inquired, he merely grinned at her knowingly. She couldn’t help wondering if this behavior might be calculated to irritate her.
O-Nobu had never taken Kobayashi seriously. Behind her contempt, based partly on the standard set by her husband’s evaluation and partly on a belief in her own intuition, was yet another determining factor she had never revealed to anyone. This was simply that Kobayashi was poor. That he had no social standing. In her eyes, editing a magazine with no readers could hardly be considered reputable employment. The Kobayashi she saw wandered aimlessly though life with the look of the outcast eternally on his face. As if in a panic, he lurched from place to place, whining like a vagrant and spewing abuse.
But this variety of contempt was always accompanied by a measure of suspicion. This was particularly so for a woman unaccustomed to this class of person, a young woman at that, with meager experience. In the event, this was how O-Nobu felt as she faced Kobayashi. It was by no means the case that she had never until now met people as poor as he. But the people who were in and out of Okamoto’s household knew their place; understanding that there were differences in rank and station, they dared to act only inside the sphere that was open to them. Never in her life had she had contact with a person as impudent as Kobayashi, who took such liberties, spoke with such self-importance though he had neither wealth nor position, vilified the upper class so vociferously — this was a first.
Abruptly something occurred to her.
Is it possible this fellow I’ve always considered a fool is actually a cunning scoundrel who can make a lot of trouble?
As the suspicion lurking behind her contempt stepped boldly forward, O-Nobu’s attitude abruptly changed. Whereupon Kobayashi, possibly as evidence that he had registered the change, and possibly in indifference, loudly guffawed.
“Mrs. T! There’s a lot more — things you’d like to know.”
“Is that so? I think I’ve heard enough for today. If you tell me everything at once I’ll have nothing to look forward to.”
“Maybe you’re right — shall we call it a day? If you have a fit because I’ve upset you, Tsuda-kun will hold me responsible.”
O-Nobu turned around. Behind her was a wall. She made a show of straining to hear evidence of O-Toki coming from that direction. But the kitchen, just beyond the sitting room, was quiet as before. O-Toki, who should have been back long ago, had not returned.
“Where could she be?”
“She’ll be back. She’s not about to get lost, so you needn’t worry.”
Kobayashi didn’t budge. With no other choice, O-Nobu used the empty teapot as an excuse to rise, but even here he intervened.
“Mrs. T! Since we have time I can continue where I left off; there’s plenty more to say. With a ne’er-do-well like me, talk is just as cheap as silence for killing time, so you don’t have to stand on ceremony. What do you say? I think there are plenty of things Tsuda-kun has kept from you in the name of, what shall I call it, propriety?”
“Perhaps—”
“He’s not as frank as he seems.”
O-Nobu shuddered. There was no way she could avoid secretly affirming Kobayashi’s assessment, and the fact that it was so precisely on the mark wounded her even more. How rude he was, she thought, looking at him, with no understanding of her own position. Heedlessly, Kobayashi repeated himself.
“Mrs. T! There’s a lot more that you don’t know.”
“What if there is?”
“Things you’d want to know.”
“I’m sure I don’t care.”
“Let me put it another way: what if I said things you really ought to know! You still don’t care?”
“That’s right, I don’t!”
[85]
CYNICISM EDDIED in Kobayashi’s face. His countenance proclaimed the certainty of victory in just a matter of time. His manner even suggested he would like to extend this moment of elation into the future so that he might live the rest of his life basking in it.
What a despicable man, O-Nobu thought to herself. For a time she returned his glare as though unwilling to be bested. It was Kobayashi who spoke up first.
“Mrs. T, there’s something I absolutely must tell you as proof that Tsuda-kun has changed, but you seem so defeated, I’ll save that for afterward and begin with an opposite example, for your reference, of how he hasn’t changed one bit. I’d like to insist that you listen to this no matter how disagreeable it is — may I proceed?”
“Do as you wish,” O-Nobu said coldly.
“Much obliged,” Kobayashi replied, laughing.
“Tsuda-kun has had contempt for me since the old days. It’s true what I said before about his big change. But his contempt for me is the one thing that’s the same now as always. Not changed in the slightest. It appears that even your power to reform him, clever as you are, hasn’t mattered. Not that either of you would necessarily feel there was anything unreasonable about his attitude—”
Interrupting himself, Kobayashi peered at the forced smile on O-Nobu’s face. Then he continued.
“Don’t get me wrong — I’m not saying I want him to change particularly. I have no intention of relying on your efforts in that regard, so you needn’t concern yourself. The truth is, Tsuda-kun isn’t the only one who has contempt for me. I’m a person who is held in contempt by everyone. Even cheap women have contempt for me. To paint the complete picture, the whole world is clamoring to hold me in contempt.”