“Whatever.” His jacket dropped to the floor. “Just so you need me for—” He inhaled sharply as she came naked into his arms and began to rub against him. “Dear God.” He closed his eyes. “I’m so damn close. Give me one minute.”
“I don’t want to—” She moved away from him. She was panting. Her skin felt burning, aching yet satin smooth, inviting touch. Inviting him. “Where’s your control, Cameron?”
“I don’t know,” he said jerkily. “I don’t have it with you. Everything’s different with you.” He was naked, pulling her to the couch and tipping her down onto softness. “The first time is going to be fast. I’ll make it good, but I can’t—” He parted her thighs and sank into her.
Deep.
Hot.
Hard.
She groaned through clenched teeth, and her nails sank into his shoulders.
But he was groaning hoarsely, too, and moving, lifting her to meet every thrust, turning her, taking every bit of her.
Madness.
Striving.
Her stomach was clenching to give more, take more.
But she couldn’t take more no matter how she tried. And it was driving her insane.
She held him frantically tighter. “Cameron.”
“I know.” His tongue was in her mouth, taking deep. He raised his head. “Now … I’m sorry … it has to be now.”
“Sorry?” Her teeth sank into his shoulder. “Do it.”
He went deep, deeper than before. She hadn’t thought it was possible, but he was pinning her and stroking with an intensity that was causing her mouth to open in a silent scream.
Deeper.
Round.
Deeper.
Frantic.
She climaxed!
And the scream was no longer silent but had become a broken sobbing of sheer pleasure and relief.
She was only vaguely aware of Cameron’s low cry and his body stiffening above her. She was lost in a haze of pure physical sensation.
He was leaving her.
She instinctively tried to keep him inside her.
“Shh, not right now.” He pushed her away and kissed her breast. “Rest, then I’ll make this up to you.”
What was he talking about? Oh, yes, something about control or lack of it. But none of that was important now. What was important was that she felt empty without him and wanted him back, wanted the rhythm and the madness back.
She watched him move off the couch, the moonlight playing on that beautiful, strong body like a shadow lover. But she wanted to see more of him. She was feeling a crazy sense of possession. “Turn on the lamp.”
“No, I don’t want anyone looking down from the house and noticing that we’re here.” He took out his penlight, turned it on, and put it on the end table by the couch. “But I want to see you, too.”
The beam was only a little brighter than the moonlight, but she could see him. Oh, yes, superbly masculine and totally sexual. Purely sensual, muscular, tight belly and buttocks. And now that she had what she wanted, she was feeling a little awkward about it. Or perhaps it was because the first frantic, feverish need was subsiding, and her head was clearing.”It’s okay. You’re right, the light’s not necessary.”
“The hell it’s not.” His gaze was slowly going over her. “You’re magnificent, you know. All gold and sable and grace. I want to take my time and memorize every gorgeous inch of you.” He knelt before her, and his hands cupped her breasts and lifted them to his mouth. “Because I can’t see time or opportunity allowing us another occasion like this anytime soon.” He sucked gently, then teethed the nipple. “And you may decide I’m not what you want. I’ll try to rectify that clumsiness I showed last time, but it’s your decision.”
His teeth were causing her nipple to harden and the need to return. And he had to know it. She said, “You’re being very meek, but I think you’re full of shit.”
He lifted his head and smiled. “Partly. I have no intention of giving you or this up. I just have to find a way to keep it going that won’t interfere with your independence.” He parted her thighs, widened them, and began stroking the soft hair. “I admire and respect your independence. Did I ever tell you that?”
She was losing her breath again. “I can’t remember its coming up.”
“I do. But it’s going to get in the way. I found out something tonight. I kept thinking … mine.”
“How barbaric and completely chauvinistic. What about your independence?”
He grinned. “That doesn’t bother me.”
“I’m sure,” she said dryly. “Because you consider it totally inviolate. Not fair, Cameron.”
“No, but I’m trying to give as much as I can.” His fingers started gently plucking. “I know I can’t have it all my own way.”
Heat was spreading from his fingers to her entire lower body, and she had to steady her voice. “Why even discuss it? It’s only sex and really has nothing to do with who we are. Who I am. This isn’t me. Do you think I do this all the time? You managed to sweep me away, and I’m still dizzy from it. But I’ll come to my senses. So will you.”
“Will I?” He leaned forward, and his lips touched her belly. “I don’t think so. I’m caught. I don’t even want to be free.” He licked delicately. “So I’ll just have to find a way to have you. Get used to the idea.”
She closed her eyes as her entire body started to ready. “It’s only sex,” she repeated. “And you’ll become bored. I’m just another woman in your life.”
“Neither of us is going to become bored.” His fingers were moving down. “We started out with something pretty incredible, and I’ll keep fanning the flame until it gets so high, it will burn us both to touch it.”
She was burning now. His fingers were doing something strange, wickedly erotic … “Cameron.”
“You like that?” He rubbed his cheek against her belly, and she felt the faint bearded roughness. “I told you I’d take my time from now on. Providing I can keep control. I believe I can hold on. I told you I was forced to limit sexual encounters to prostitutes, and that may have advantages for you. I was taught many, many ways. There are so many things I can do with my hands and mouth…” Pressure. Two fingers. His thumb. “And I can do them for hours and hours.” Three fingers. He pressed hard with his thumb.
She cried out and lunged upward as an explosion of pure lust shot through her.
“Shh, it’s just starting.” He was rubbing, pressing, pinching. “I love to see you like this. Will you believe that it’s the only control I want to have over you?”
Her head was moving back and forth on the couch in an agony of need. “No, I don’t—believe you.”
“Well, right now.” He whispered, “And perhaps, if I bring you enough pleasure, you’ll let me share that beautiful mind while I’m inside your body. That would be spectacular. There’s a thousand sensations and emotions I could give you if you permit me to do that.”
“No.” She could barely speak as she clenched helplessly around his fingers. “Dangerous.”
“Not if you trust me.”
She shook her head.
“You’re trusting me to do this to you. That’s only another step.” He looked up at her and coaxed, “It would please me. Sometimes I think I love that mind of yours better than I do your body.” He leaned forward and licked her nipple. “And then I realize that I can have both if I work hard at it.”
“You can’t have either.” Dear heaven, his fingers, intricate, knowing … She hadn’t known anyone could do that …
“Yes, I can. Just look at us. Right now, this is strictly on loan. But I’m working toward making it a permanent arrangement.” His lips returned to her belly. “But you’re distracting me, I’m not working hard enough. I have to see if I can make you want to please me as much I’m pleasing you.” His breath was warm and heavy as he moved down. “What do you think, Catherine?”
Don’t scream. Don’t scream. Don’t scream.
She screamed.
CHAPTER
16
Something was wrong.
Something was missing.
Cameron wasn’t with her.
Catherine’s eyes flew open.