For a moment, he was certain it was over. The sword flashed, gleaming blue, sweeping toward the exposed neck of the legendary beast. But his sword fell on empty air, and clanged down on solid rock in a shower of blue sparks.
“You almost killed me, Maddock!” Bones shouted.
“I was trying to save you!”
“Look out!” Grizzly cried.
Something powerful struck Maddock across the back of the thighs. His legs were swept out from under him and he hit the ground hard on his back. Pain radiated in all directions from the base of his spine. He tasted warm salty blood in his mouth.
“That hurt.” He forced his eyes open to see Bones leap backward as the beast’s powerful tail swept back toward him.
Somehow, Maddock managed to roll to the side. He felt the rush of foul air and the splash of dank water as the tip of the tail sliced through the air mere centimeters from his face.
“I got the cauldron back inside the symbol, but she’s not stopping,” Grizzly said. “Maybe she’s immune to the magic.”
“Either that or she’s got the bloodlust in her,” Bones said, fending off the creature with another thrust of the spear. “No telling how long it’s been since she’s tasted human flesh. This chick’s got the munchies. I guess a Tuatha snack wasn’t enough to satisfy her.”
Maddock’s eyes flashed from the beast to the cauldron in Grizzly’s hands.
He had an idea. A crazy, foolish, probably doomed to fail idea, but it was the only one he had.
“Give me the cauldron.” He snatched the gleaming kettle, turned and looked around. There, a few feet from him, lay O’Brien’s severed arm. Grimacing, he picked up the severed limb and dropped it into the cauldron.
“Bones, keep her distracted for just a couple more seconds!”
“What the hell does it look like I’m doing?” Bones ducked behind the statue of Danu as the creature snapped at him again. She struck the statue, shattering the face of the ancient Goddess as her fangs snapped shut.
Maddock staggered to the edge of the lake, as close to the beast as he dared. He scooped some water into the pot then set the cauldron down at the edge of the triskele.
“Dinner time!” he shouted, clanging the sword against the rim of the cauldron.
He stumbled backward, barely keeping his feet. Beneath them, the Celtic pattern once again burned with a powerful intensity.
Brilliant light danced within the depths of the golden gem inside the cauldron. The cauldron itself began to glow, and then, the water inside began to boil. Steam spiraled upward, spinning in strange tendrils like gossamer threads.
Despite its grisly contents, the aroma was like no scent Maddock had ever smelled. It reminded him at once of venison, good bourbon, and fresh cucumbers.
“Am I crazy, or does that smell like chocolate chip cookies?” Grizzly asked.
“Smells like the chicken wings at my strip club,” Bones said.
The beast seemed to notice, too. She cocked her head and stared at the cauldron, the fight forgotten. Slowly, she lowered her head toward the bubbling liquid.
“When she starts to eat,” Maddock whispered, “run!”
The beastie of the lake plunged her head into the cauldron, dipped up the steaming brew, birdlike, raised her head, and let it run down her gullet.
Maddock didn’t have to tell the others what to do. Equal parts adrenaline and desperation overcame their injuries, and they ran, leaping from stepping stone to stepping stone, and back onto the ledge. As they vanished into the dark tunnel, Maddock stole a glance back to see the creature still devouring the contents of the cauldron.
“The cauldron of the Dagda, from which none came away unsatisfied,” Grizzly panted as they ran. “That was brilliant!”
“Maddock gets one good idea a year,” Bones said. “I just try to be somewhere close by when he does.”
They emerged from the Well of the Seven Heads two hours later, much to the surprise of a confused-looking pair of nuns. One let out a shriek and the pair turned and fled.
Maddock looked down at his torn, dirty, blood-stained clothes, and thought he understood. Then he remembered he still carried the sword of the Tuatha.
“Just like Maddock to scare off the hot chicks.” Bones, still holding the spear, peered over the edge of the well.
“Don’t worry. I won’t make a habit of it.”
Bones narrowed his eyes. “Leave the puns to me, Maddock.”
Chapter 35
Maddock sat at a rickety picnic table outside the Boathouse Lochside Restaurant. It was a small, quaint-looking establishment, its green walls blending in with the trees that shaded its white roof. A purple sign that read The Boathouse hung from the wall just to the left of two tall picture windows.
Grizzly, his arm in a sling, stood nearby, chatting with an elderly couple who had recognized him from his investigative work. The cryptid hunter’s words drifted over to where Maddock sat.
“I can’t say for certain that I’ll be studying the Loch,” he said. “It’s not that I don’t believe in Nessie. It’s just that it’s been done so many times. Maybe the old girl could use a break.”
Smiling wistfully, Maddock looked out across the dark waters of Loch Ness. In the distance, a boat loaded with tourists sliced through the water. Its occupants leaned on the rails, clutching cameras and smartphones, all eager for a glimpse of the legendary beast of the lake. He smiled. If they only knew the truth.
“You coming?” Bones said. “Food. Ale. Babes.” He frowned. “Well, babes for me; maybe one for Grizzly if we can find a chick with low expectations.”
“As opposed to the low self-esteem girls for you?” Maddock asked. He shifted around in his seat, his wounded leg throbbing.
“Don’t get snippy with me, Maddock. It’s not my fault your side ho joined up with some Celtic terrorists.”
“I was just kidding.” Maddock took out his phone. “I’ll be along in a minute. I need to call your sister. She ought to be awake by now.”
Bones nodded slowly. “Depending on how that conversation goes, there might be some babes inside for you, too.” He reached out and put a hand on Maddock’s shoulder. “I know this is weird because it’s my sister, but no matter what happens, you and I will always be brothers.” He snatched his hand back as if he’d touched a hot stove. “And that’s the only wussy thing I’m going to say to you for the rest of the week, unless I get stupid and get into the tequila tonight.”
“You realize you exist in a perpetual state of halfway to stupid, don’t you?”
“Screw you, Maddock.” Bones turned on his heel and headed back toward the restaurant.
Maddock hesitated, then punched up Angel’s number. Her drowsy voice answered after the first ring.
“Hey, you.”
“Hey, yourself.”
Another of the long, uncomfortable pauses.
“You’ve been out of touch for a couple of days,” she said. “That usually means you’ve been doing something interesting.”
“Well, if you call almost getting eaten by the Loch Ness monster interesting, then yes.”
The couple who’d been chatting with Grizzly looked sharply at him as they passed by, but kept moving.
“Don’t lie to me, you assclown.”
“I’m serious. We found the treasure of the Tuatha de Dannan, got attacked by their modern descendants, I got shot, and then…”
“Whoa!” Angel interrupted. “Back up! You don’t just drop a bomb like that on me and keep going.”
“It’s not that bad,” he assured her. “Besides, the monster was a lot worse than the bullets. She almost took us out.”
“You didn’t hurt Nessie, did you?” she asked.