His thinly veiled threat and the murderous glare in his eyes didn’t even register. “I don’t care. I need to see her.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, he stared me down. “What makes you think she’s got any desire to see you?”
“I don’t know!” I raked my hands through my tangled hair. “She probably never wants to see me again, but I don’t give a shit. I’m in love with her! I’ve been going out of my fucking mind for four goddamned days, and I’m not leaving here until I see her.”
Something about everything I’d just said loosened Carson’s stance and made him smile. The adrenaline I’d been running on finally started to fade, and fear that he was actually going to shoot me took hold. Slapping me on the back, he pulled me to his side with a boisterous, “Well, why didn’t you say that? Come on in, we’re just about to have dinner.”
Yep, I was about to die. I had no doubt he was leading me to some sort of kill room with floor drains and plastic-covered walls, but if I got at least a glimpse of Navie before the end came, I could die a happy man.
Fortunately, to my surprise, he actually led me into a dining room filled with people. I recognized Cassidy right away. Next to her was a little girl who was her spitting image. I recalled Navie talking about her family a few times and if memory served, that was her daughter, Willow. There was an older man and woman I could only assume were Milly and Kal, Cassidy’s aunt and uncle, and another man and woman, who looked to be in their mid-twenties. I tried to remember if Navie had ever mentioned them, but everything around me suddenly faded away when the door from the kitchen pushed open and the woman I’d been going crazy over walked into the room holding a large bowl of green beans.
She came to a sudden halt when she saw me, those beautiful, dark blue eyes widening, her jaw dropping slightly in surprise. I was so focused on her, soaking in every single thing I could, trying to memorize her beauty in that moment, that I hadn’t noticed the room had grown eerily quiet.
“H-hi,” she stuttered uncomfortably, her gaze darting around my face like she was trying to memorize me, as well.
“Hi.”
We didn’t say anything else. Carson, however, took that as an opportunity to break up the silence. “Guys, this is Rowan Locklaine, Navie’s boss. He’s here to grovel and beg for forgiveness. Rowan, you know Cassidy. This is our daughter, Willow.” He pointed at the little girl. “That’s Kal and Milly,” he said, indicating the older couple. “And these are our friends, Lana and Zeke.” He waved a hand at the last two people at the table.
Like it wasn’t the most awkward introduction in the history of existence, Carson pulled out a chair on the other side of his wife and took a seat. Looking around uncomfortably, I noticed the only available chair was one directly across from where Navie was standing. Not wanting to risk losing sight of her, I ignored the stares from everyone and sat down, watching as she nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and lowered into her own chair, placing the bowl on the table without lifting her eyes.
“Hi,” I repeated, like a fucking moron. I just needed her to lift those eyes back up to me. The instant she did, my heart flipped in my chest.
She blushed red as she gazed at me through her lashes. “Hi.”
“You think that’s all these two’ll say for the rest of dinner?” the guy introduced as Zeke asked.
“Shh,” Milly scolded. “I’m tryin’ to listen.”
“You look beautiful,” I continued, ignoring everyone around us.
She offered me a tiny, one-sided grin and a quiet, “Thanks.”
“This has got to be the most uncomfortable fuckin’ meal I ever been to,” Kal grumbled from the other end of the table.
“Shh!” Milly, along with Cassidy and Lana that time, chided.
I sucked at small talk. Richard had always been the smooth one, whereas I choked when it had to do with simple, mundane conversation. Deciding to bypass all pleasantries, I went for broke. “I miss you, Navie. I’m so sorry for hurting you. Please, take me back.”
She didn’t say anything. No one did. And I could have sworn everyone around me was holding their breath, just waiting to see how this little show played out. Tossing her napkin on the table, Navie stood from her chair and faced me full-on. “Let’s talk in private,” she said with a tilt of her chin in the direction of the kitchen. Standing up, I followed after her like a lost puppy as the dining room erupted in shouts of objections. I could have sworn I heard Kal grumble something about it being better than a soap-opera.
Hyper-awareness took over the moment the door shut firmly behind me, and all I could think about was how close I finally was to her, how badly I needed to touch her. But the way she stood at the far end of the room, pressed against the counter like she needed every available inch of space between us, kept me rooted in place.
“So…” I started, “that’s your family?”
“Yep.”
The one-word answers were killing me. I wanted her to yell at me, scream and cuss and rant—whatever she needed to do to get it all out. I just needed to hear her voice and not the monosyllabic bullshit I was getting. With a sigh, I ran a hand through my disheveled hair. “Navie—”
“Why’d you do it?” she asked, cutting me off and momentarily confusing me.
“Why did I do what?”
Those denim eyes glistened with unshed tears, knocking the wind out of me. “Why did you kiss her?”
“Oh, baby.” Her tears broke free and each one was like a punch in the gut. I couldn’t stay away from her any longer. I was across the kitchen in a flash, my hands cupping her cheeks, my thumbs trying to brush away her sadness. “I didn’t kiss her, Navie, I swear. She kissed me. She showed up at the apartment after you left to get coffee and pushed her way in, saying she needed to talk. She threw herself at me.”
“But… y-you were holding her like… just like this,” she stuttered, reaching up and wrapping her hands around my wrists where I held her face in my palms.
“I was trying to get her off me. She caught me off-guard for a moment, but I never kissed her back. Please, believe me. I would never do that to you.”
She lowered her head, taking her eyes from me and gave it a shake. “I thought…”
“Thought what?” I prompted.
When she spoke again, her voice was so quiet I almost couldn’t hear, but once what she said registered, a part of me wished I hadn’t. “I’ve never been good enough for anyone.”
“That’s not true,” I ground out, using her hair to tip her head back up so I could see her. “Baby, you can’t believe that—”
“None of my foster families kept me,” she continued, each word gutting me. “My own mom didn’t want me. The boy who asked me to prom only did it as a prank so he and his friends could make fun of me. I hardly had any friends growing up, and until I met Carson, I never had a family. When I saw you kissing her, I just thought—”
“That I was just like everyone else,” I finished for her, even though it killed me.
She nodded on a muffled sob and tried to drop her head again, but I wasn’t having it.
“Look at me,” I demanded. When her heartbroken gaze finally met mine, I spoke the words I knew were the God’s honest truth. “I’m in love with you.” Her mouth dropped open on a gasp, but I wasn’t finished. “When you ran away from me? That was the worst moment of my life.”
“But—”
“No buts. Nothing compared to the pain I felt when I thought I had lost you. Not what happened with Bree, not losing my brother, nothing. It hurt in a way I’m not sure I could survive. I have never, ever loved someone the way I love you. What I felt for Bree isn’t even a shadow of what I feel for you. Do you get that? For the first time in my life, I am completely in love with someone else. I can’t lose you, Navie. I can’t.”