that in me all impressions feelings touches multiply
I told him she’s the one she said.
solidify
He said That’s what she said to me.
Take hold of me.
Day Four: She looked me in the eye as if to share a secret. He looked well beyond us toward the NORTH FAÇADE. We stood upon a patch of land on the estate within the CORNER
SOUTHMOST where a tiny house once stood. The stonework for that tiny house as he explained was laid by local masons. He said Quarried locally then told us that a boat was bought to carry the stone down river. All of this was engineered he said by him.
He means the late great Milton Butterfield she said.
Day Five: We then began the long walk back
To the VERANDAH she had said.
It was a period of remarks about the grounds the foliage seasons winter coming Christmas presents apple cider holly berry satin ribbon. I looked out across the lawn that seemed in its expansiveness to validate my sudden dreading of the weeks the days until it would be Christmas Day. As we approached the rising slope to where THE FIVE STONE STEPS would take us to the walkway hooking around the CORNER
NORTHWEST of the mansion she said Now just getting back to what we had been talking about last night
She paused.
I turned to watch a twinkling snowfall taking place across the lawns. Black birds were diving skipping leaving coal black markings on the white. Then suddenly
excruciatingly
the snow
the markings
disappeared.
The CORNER
NORTHWEST had bay windows looking out upon an autumn colors view that reached down to the boathouse.
Be prepared I told myself. They’re going to ask you something you won’t want to answer with an answer.
I peeked in the window from outside.
607
I stuck the key into the
Covering all four walls a figurative print rich brilliant colors created a selection of the principal trades chief occupations aspects of the Chinese style of life. Against a dark red background illustrated cutouts of a rural Chinese landscape featured brightly colored Chinese figures firing pots they hauled the pots away they loaded them on the junk they gathered rice stacked rice they argued to a judge they carried out the various stages in production not just tea but silk they even grew a Chinese garden.
It was papered in a weighty dense repetitive unceasing world of working. Talking.
Thinking.
Still it was a cheerful although seedy room small lamps on either side of the bed a Chinese chandelier two floor lamps plus a table lamp without its shade bed covered with a leafy bedspread bearing no stylistic similarity even to the garden illustrations on the walls. The bed was big enough for two coordinated with a red gold wingback chair set in the corner near the window. Bed like chair was decorated with gold satin pillows differing in their shapes all old all floppy threadbare looking.
Then I
Yes I would have liked to get to business but I took my boots off closed the heavy curtains peeled the bedspread back exposing
Once there were two teenaged sons who on cool moonlit evenings left their home and walked into the woods presumably to court young girls.
a pale pink
When I thought I saw a moving form behind the glass he took me gently by the arm then turned us all around to face the autumn colors view said There look back down there. He motioned with his finger toward the east. Now following the slope down to that tree he said you should be able to catch the corner of the boathouse there.
She said We’ll take you there.
Of course we’ll take her there he said.
She said We’ll have a picnic by the boathouse.
Though I wanted to I did not ask them when the picnic would take place.
In time the shock will fade. Her sadness may diminish too. Although repeated entrances
new acts of waking
walls the softest blue
may give impressions of repeated shock
soft carpet
blue
gauze curtains shimmering in the night
each shock remains as freshly devastating
undulating
heart
knees
fingers
as the old shock was.
No it was not my intention to fall asleep. It was my intention to rest my eyes get up go look for him.
Day 2
Next morning due to (Room Service: N) to (Restaurant: N) to (Vending Machines: N) (Coffee/Tea: N) I went out to find a place for breakfast.
Late one night concealing himself behind a tree their father who for various reasons had become suspicious of these outings watched his sons begin to roll upon the ground beside a campfire.
After breakfast I walked back through playground in the park through park then made the rest of the way to the hotel. I went up to my room collected (Bag Storage: N) then took the elevator right back down returned the key into the slot below the room selection panel.
In this clearing lit up by the fire beneath a heavy to bursting moon the sons rolled over and over becoming as their father watched them wolves.
Besides some unexplainable sounds a shaving smell or two the hallways whiff of mouthwash breath were empty. If not for so few illuminated numbers on the room selection grid I would have sworn all rooms were empty too. The place felt empty
although utterly full of
I don’t think he’s here I just don’t think this thing is right I told myself when I stepped out into the patio began to make my way to (Recommended: Y).
A week
I think
It’s hard to say. No depth. No clear perspective. No free space.
before I met them I had started having problems with my
Previously
But this had been my pattern for as long as
sleep.
A lack of evidence.
I woke up. Walked. Discovered I was in the light of the refrigerator opening up a little tub of
Just about a week before I met them though I found that I would wake up get up out of bed
dried cherries. Not so interested anymore in snacks I found that I was walking through my dark apartment
As their father watched them from behind the trees the wolves attacked and murdered a couple walking on the rarely traveled footpath.
to a hanging photograph from which I
When I met them for about a week or more before that meeting I had started hearing wheezing coughing sobbing squeezing out the corners of the frame. I’d turn around walk back get into bed return to sleep wake up walk back to it again.
The night we met my sleeping troubles disappeared.
Night Five: A bit more wine girls? he said.
We were seated on the VERANDAH.
Be right back he said.
She leaned in closer to me said It seems as though we have a deep connection you and I. Do you know what I mean?
Night Six: We said goodbye just at the edge of the estate where parked beside the gate a taxicab was waiting in the dark.
Night Seven: After getting ready after giving my bags a run through guidebook matchbook I emerged from my apartment building right on schedule having factored in the likely waiting time for taxicabs around the corner by the bus stop. Right away I noticed that their car was sitting out in front of my apartment building. I had not expected them to pick me up