“How do we get through two more nights like this?”
He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it. “I need you with me. Please. We can do this.”
She took a deep breath and looked at him. “No more fucking dancing. Not while we’re here alone and can get ourselves in trouble.”
“Fair enough. Can I take you to a show tonight?”
She nodded.
“Now be a good girl, go get your shower, then I’ll get mine, right?”
She got out of bed, and the hotel room door caught her eye. “You didn’t flip the safety bar last night!”
“What?”
She walked over and closed it. “You can’t forget that, Ty.”
He smiled sheepishly. “Sorry, love. I forget, you know that.”
She took her things into the bathroom and shut the door behind her.
Nevvie felt Tyler’s eyes on her most of the day. He didn’t hesitate to take and hold her hand while walking from one event to another. She finally met Elliot in person, and Tyler’s agent, Steve Maris. She loved watching Tyler from the wings as he entertained the audience, sat on a Q&A panel with other well-known authors, the fans lining up for autographs after lunch.
She stood behind the table with him, opening the books to the signature pages, nudging slowpokes along to keep the line moving. She’d never seen this side of Tyler. She was used to Thomas’ business persona. Watching Tyler pound away at his laptop wasn’t the same as the deft way he handled the public. To see him the way others saw him was a strange experience, in a good way.
Others never saw the steamy, sexy dancer, or the man who walked out to the kitchen for morning coffee dressed only in his boxers. The man who carried her to safety after Alex’s attack, and who tenderly held her at the doctor.
She felt she had a secret—and of course, she did. The audience thought they knew Tyler, including a few aggressively adoring fans who followed him around most of the day until Elliot helped her turn them away. Nevvie did know Tyler. She would sleep in his bed that night—even if all they did was sleep—and she truly got to love him.
Sort of.
Nevvie admitted a smug satisfaction at the obviously smitten looks of a few fans, male and female. Tyler was all hers.
Well, as much as she could have him. She knew she didn’t have to worry about anyone else, and she didn’t mind sharing him with Thomas.
That night, Tyler took her to a Broadway show, followed by a late dinner at Sardi’s. She avoided looking into his eyes, afraid she’d cry remembering how close she’d felt to him the night before. Despite that they talked, and she had a good time before they returned to their hotel a few blocks away.
The bed looked huge, like an elephant in the corner instead of a comforting place to rest. Tyler followed her gaze.
“Do you want me to make you a cup of tea, sweetheart?”
Euphemism for, “Want me to fix you something to knock you out?”
“No. Can we talk for a while?” She could do this. She would do this. She’d suck it up and quit acting like a baby.
“Of course, love.”
She prepared for bed while Tyler called Thomas. They didn’t chat long. Tyler passed her the phone and went to freshen up.
“Having fun?”
She missed him. Mixed in with her crazy desire was the guilt that she wasn’t with Thomas, especially with so much to do. Geller’s indictment would come down any time, and she was helping audit not only Geller’s projects, but all of them for the past ten years. Apparently the theft was limited to Geller, as far as they could tell, but to the tune of five hundred thousand dollars.
“I’m okay.”
“You don’t sound okay.”
“Just tired.”
He dropped his voice. “Sugar, you’re going through another stage. Trust us on this.”
Trust. She did trust them, but she wanted to sit them down and beg them to fuck her brains out. “Yeah. I guess.”
“Sweetie, we love you, you know that.”
She knew it, but their kind of love and what she wanted were two different animals. “I know.”
“Sleep tight, sweetheart. Don’t let Tyler bite.”
She finally laughed and hung up, crawling into bed. Tyler joined her a few minutes later, and she couldn’t deny snuggling with him felt right.
“What did you wish to talk about?”
“Why did you marry twice before you ended up with Thomas?”
He tensed for a second. Obviously not a subject he enjoyed talking about.
“I met One while I was still teaching at USF. She was a graduate student, and we had a lot in common. I was in love with her. After six months she told me I smothered her.”
“Smothered?”
He hesitated. “I wanted everything to be perfect.”
Nevvie could imagine that. “Was she pretty?”
“Not nearly as beautiful as you, sweet.” He stroked her thigh through the sheet, his hand coming to rest on her hip. “She was a marathon runner, always training, measuring her carbs and protein and all that. I got yelled at once for making her a peach cobbler.”
“Ungrateful bitch.”
“Quite.” Nevvie suspected there was more but didn’t want to push.
“What about your other wife?”
“Two was a rebound relationship, I’m sorry to say. I didn’t try hard enough, which wasn’t fair to her. I feared repeating mistakes with One, and I was dealing with the aftermath of another break-up.”
“How long were you married to her?”
“Nearly a year. I met Thomas soon after.”
They laid there for a moment. “When did you have your first relationship with a man?”
She wasn’t sure he would answer. When he did, his voice sounded quiet. “After One I thought maybe I’d look around, finally admitted I wouldn’t be adverse to it. I had a couple of dalliances here and there. Then I met someone I liked and found out a few weeks into it that he wasn’t interested in forever, just for now.”
“Then you met Two?”
He nodded against her shoulder. “I thought I’d try it again with the fairer sex.”
“Why did you fall for Thomas? How did you know he was interested?”
She wanted to hear Tyler’s version of how they met. After a long moment he spoke, his voice full of fond memories.
“When he walked into Haslam’s I noticed him immediately. His smile, his laugh. I loved his eyes. The way he walked, held himself, talked with his friends, he struck me as someone open and honest. So I took a risk and put out the suggestion during my talk that I’d be open to meeting a man. Fortunately, for once, he was listening.”
“How was your first time?” She dared meet his eyes.
“You mean…intercourse with a man?”
She nodded.
He couldn’t hide his pain, not from her. After a few moments he answered. “It wasn’t with Thomas, and it wasn’t pleasant. I thought he wanted more than sex. He was older and I made the mistake of trusting him too soon. I’d done other things with men but not that, wanting to be sure I could be emotionally invested in it.” He took a deep, shuddering breath and managed a wan smile. “I promised myself that if I was ever someone’s first I wouldn’t repeat that man’s mistakes.”
Her heart broke for him. “Did he hurt you?”
Tyler looked away. “He wasn’t gentle, if that’s what you mean.” He took another shuddering breath at the obviously painful memory. “It wasn’t at all romantic or loving. Apparently I’m not as good a judge of character as I thought. He walked out and I never saw him again.”
“So that’s when you met Two?”
“It wasn’t fair to her. She got a lot of my anger. I was tired of trying to take care of others and getting hurt for my efforts.”
“Thomas?”
A true smile. “Our sweet Thomas had played around with men and women, but I was fortunate enough to be his first, in that way.”