“And when will that be exactly? After your first heart attack? You have got to slow down, Lex.”
“I’m working on it,” she snapped, my heart attack comment hitting a nerve. We had all lived mostly carefree lives until our father’s sudden death. Coming face to face with mortality had left a permanent mark on us all. Priorities started to change slowly for each of us, whether we realized it or not.
“I love you sister, that’s all, and I don’t need you dying on me, too,” I murmured, staring at a photo of Dad and his golf buddies. “Then again, who am I to give advice? I still share a crummy apartment, drive a ten year old car, and work for an hourly wage.”
“You’ll be an old maid too and we can vacation together.”
I laughed as I argued against it. “I’m going to marry Jayden Monroe as soon as he asks me.”
“Wow,” she said, eyeing me over a tall box as she took a seat in the office chair. “It’s that good, huh?”
“It’s real, and it’s happiness, and it’s love,” I said, thinking of how close Jay and I had become since our first night together. We were inseparable, sharing a meal and a bed almost daily. We had long since finished our first Netflix series and were currently in our fourth season of Lost. Jayden, I had learned was mostly a homebody. I didn’t mind it much since we were still in the honeymoon phase of our relationship, and both insatiable for each other. When we weren’t skin exploring, we were sharing amazing food or keeping ourselves entertained. It was the best time I’d ever spent with a man and I couldn’t get enough.
“Have you told him that?” she asked as I smiled into space.
“No, of course not. It’s too soon,” I said, taping shut the last box. “I don’t want to scare him away.”
“So, it’s not too soon to feel it, but it’s too soon to say it?”
“I think it was instant for me, which is scary. But the more time I spend with him, the more I feel it’s justified. He’s really good to me, Lex. Like he takes amazing care of me.”
“That’s awesome, sis, really. I’m so happy for you.”
“Yeah, well ...” I lifted the box, putting it in a stack by the door. “I wish you the same and soon.”
“I’m happy, really. There’s someone, and only one, right now, actually.”
“Really?” I asked, excited.
“Hell no. I’m not that stupid,” she said, cracking up as I threw packing tape at her. “Well, I’ll take Jayden, you keep your boy toys.”
“Gladly. Shall we join the crazy tribe?” she asked as I clicked off the light.
“Let’s.”
Alexis put her hand on my shoulder and I looked over at her. “I’m happy for you, Hilary, really.”
“Thanks,” I said as she gave me a quick squeeze.
“And I’ll be there in a few weeks to check him out. Set it up.” I gave pause at the top of the stairs. “Wait, what?”
“You should have known better than to yap about him. I think it’s time one of us had a hand in this decision of yours to marry a man you just met.”
“Oh, well in that case, HELL NO!”
“I’m coming, kid, make way,” she huffed, trampling down the stairs in front of me. I stopped when I saw a beige box at the foot of the stairs. Alexis caught it and looked up at me and winked. “Consider it an early birthday present.”
“Alexis, you didn’t—”
“I love you. Thanks for taking care of Mom,” she said, rounding the corner and quickly disappearing into the kitchen. I sat on the stairs, opening the box and cradling my brand new pair of heels. My sister might have bought me these seven hundred dollar shoes out of guilt, but I was happy to take advantage, and I knew just how I would debut them.
I joined my family just in time for the prayer and the collective “Amen” before my mother turned to me and said, “So, Alexis tells us you’re getting married.”
Back at home, after a long day of family time, I lay in bed staring at the ceiling, thankful for some peace and quiet. Much like my mother’s home, Jayden’s always seemed a bit chaotic. Most days he seemed restless and eager for conversation, in which he did most of the talking, and there was always the ever present background noise of loud TV, or his current music obsession. He kept busy in his small apartment, doing simple mundane chores, or exercising. Sometimes it would take him hours to fall asleep, even after we had sexually exhausted each other. I chuckled at the amount of chaos one man could cause as I stared at a selfie I’d taken of us on my phone. It screamed of love and intimacy.
I was happy on all fronts.
After a month and a half at the Leisure Agency, I wasn’t yet completely well versed but I was assured daily I was doing an amazing job. And the truth was, I loved it. I never thought planning vacations for someone else could be so damn satisfying, but in meeting with the clients, their excitement became my own. The mood was infectious and the paychecks were decent. And it didn’t hurt that I came home every night to a beautiful man with a magic pan and amazing motor skills.
I was just about to drift off into a nap when my phone buzzed.
Gerri: I just got off, are you home?
Me: YES! Yay, girls’ day.
Gerri: No shit! Yay! See you in a bit. I’ll pick up some wine.
Me: Awesome.
Minutes later, my catnap was interrupted by my new man.
Jayden: Hey baby.
Me: Hey. You still fishing or are you packing up?
Jayden: I’m done. We got rained out. I’m home.
Me: Well, crap. I just promised Gerri a girls’ day.
Jayden: It’s okay, babe. Have fun. Come over later?
Me: Of course.
Jayden: I’ll leave the door unlocked in case I crash early.
Me: Okay.
Jayden: Wake me up with a blow job.
Me: How romantic.
Jayden: It is to m e
I grinned at that. I loved pleasing him and he knew it, and he took full advantage of it. Along with all sides of him lurked a highly sexual man who knew my body well. He was insatiable and I found with him I let go of all my inhibitions.
He was potent, full of energy, raw, and completely real. He made couch surfing exciting and a homebody lifestyle appealing. I couldn’t wait for the right time to tell him how I truly felt, and somehow I knew without a shadow of a doubt he felt the same. And while my family openly bashed me for talking marriage so soon, I knew one day my initials would read H. A. M.
And damn it, how I wanted to be HAM.
There was something about Jayden that was both new and exciting, and at the same time felt like home. It was like a blinking red arrow in my heart that pointed directly to him. We’d had one bitch fight in our time together, and it was mostly his nagging that brought it about. His “particular” ways had a tendency to wear on me at times, but he was totally worth his quirks.
Totally.
I spent the majority of the night debriefing Gerri as she spilled the goods on her and Mike. “It...was...going,” she had confessed to me.
“He’s having fun with me, I think. Trying not to take things too serious,” she admitted as she sipped wine on the couch.