“I’ll try, baby. I will, I swear. I’m just not me when I get like that. I don’t want to hurt you.”
He reached down and turned off the water. “Get in the tub. You smell like a pinecone. I’ll go clean up then get in with you.”
I nodded.
“Okay,” he said, turning back to me. “Are you in pain?”
“Kind of,” I said truthfully. My ass did feel broken.
“I’ll get you some Tylenol.” I nodded, sinking into the hot bath.
Minutes later, he returned, handing me two aspirin and some water. I felt more relaxed than I had in days as he slid off his clothes and I watched, unashamed. He looked so damn beautiful bared before me. I appreciated every inch of his naked ass as he turned off the bathroom light so only the candles lit the room. He joined me, slipping in on the opposite side of the tub then pulled my feet into his lap. I winced again and he saw it.
“Should we take you to the ER and get you seen?”
“It’s not that bad,” I said quietly, leaning further into the back of the tub to take the pressure off my behind.
“I’ll go get you another bottle of that wine,” he said apologetically.
“It’s fine. I don’t need it.” Jayden took a single white petal with his fingertip and swirled it around in the water. I had to admit, the atmosphere he’d created was completely intoxicating. Being surrounded by a scented bath with white rose petals in a room full of candlelight was surreal.
After a few minutes of silence, he looked up at me. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Tell me what happened,” I pleaded, hoping for some insight into what had caused him to push me away.
“It’s hard to explain,” he said, cupping some water in his hands and rinsing his face. “Man, that smells amazing. I get why you like it.”
“Jayden,” I said in warning.
“Okay.” He let out a long breath. “It’s like a tidal wave that’s impossible to stop. I just get sad and a little scared. It’s not clinical, but it’s rough. I feel like everything’s wrong. Nothing will get better. You know, hopeless.”
I nodded as I felt the discomfort he was feeling from telling me.
“It doesn’t happen a lot, once or twice a year, and it doesn’t last long. It’s not even really a symptom of ADHD. I don’t know. I guess my racing brain just gets tired and I shut down. It’s all about the chemicals in my brain. You know what ADHD is, right?”
“I’m beginning to think I don’t,” I said honestly. “I started to look it up the other night and then your mom called.”
“My mom called?”
“Yes, we are going to a barbeque Saturday.”
“No shit,” he said, smiling. “What did she say?”
“Nothing, really. I’m the one that did most of the blabbing. I was nervous.”
Jayden picked up a sponge from the side of the tub and poured some liquid soap on it to suds it up then began rubbing my leg with it. “She’s going to love you, Hilary.”
“Oh yeah, how do you know that?”
“I know her.” He grinned, working the sponge on my other leg.
“Thank you for all this. It’s nice. You didn’t have to.”
“I was going to make it so much better. I didn’t think you would be home so early.”
“Our last client was at four, so Marcy let me off early,” I explained as Jayden’s sponge drifted over my stomach as he crept closer to me. Still working his sponge, he managed to lift me by my arms, pulling me into his seated lap. I felt his growing hardness as I wrapped my legs around him. His muscled arms firmly around me, he used the sponge on my back as he stared into my eyes.
“I missed you.”
“You didn’t have to,” I protested, looking away. I didn’t want to cry again. I didn’t want him to think of me as weak. I wanted him to be able to trust that I could handle it.
“Look at me,” he ordered gently, gripping me tighter as he continued to bathe me. “I wasn’t there.”
I nodded. “I’ll live. I...You didn’t tell me about that part.”
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to explain to the person you are falling for that they might not want to reciprocate your affection because you may on occasion have an uncontrollable, explosive temper tantrum? Or that you may pop off with inappropriate comments at any point in time that could alienate them? Oh, and don’t forget the controlling, OCD tendencies with a small, short-lived side of anxiety and depression. Or better yet, how to explain you weren’t listening to something important they were trying to convey because you were too busy figuring out the difference between jelly and jam.”
“Just like that,” I answered, knowing it wasn’t that simple.
“How likely would you have been to return my calls?”
“I don’t think anything could’ve stopped us,” I said quickly. “And I don’t care if you drink blood once a month from a one legged whore. I love you.”
He burst out laughing as he dropped the sponge then pulled me to his lips, kissing me deeply. Suddenly I was all too aware of the hardness between us.
“Did my mushrooms make it?” I asked between kisses.
“Yes, and everything else. Thank God that bottle didn’t break,” he said, biting my lip.
“Good, then tonight I’m cooking dinner.”
He pulled away and gave me a puzzled look. “I have no objection to that.”
“You never let me cook,” I bitched, making sure I brought up all the points I wanted to make before I let him ravage me.
“You never asked to,” he whispered before capturing my nipple in his mouth. I moaned and bucked my hips as he licked and sucked, circling my bud over and over. My sex pulsed as he moved up my chest to my neck. “Fuck, you look so sexy in candlelight.” He nuzzled my neck as I gripped his arms, moving myself along his hardness.
“What was that about replacing me with a vibrator?” I froze as he chuckled then pulled away to catch the fresh heat in my face.
“You deserved it,” I replied coyly.
“Maybe,” he whispered as his hand trailed down between us and his fingers began to taunt me. “Or maybe you just need to be reminded of who owns this.”
“Jayden,” I gasped as he pushed his fingers inside me, sliding them along my ridge. “I’m going to make you come all night so you don’t forget again.”
“Hilary!” I heard Gerri’s voice full of emotion as she walked in the front door. “Hil, you home?” Jayden groaned as I answered her before she burst through my bedroom door. “I’m in my bathroom Gerri and I’m not alone!”
I heard her hesitate just outside my door. “Okay, I really need to talk to you.” Her voice cracked again and my heart physically flinched. She needed me.
“I’ll be right there, hang on.”
Jayden stood, grabbing a towel and drying himself briefly before reaching for me. He shut my bathroom door and took his time drying me before slipping the negligee down on me and then wrapping me in the robe, leaving it untied.
“This feels amazing, thank you,” I said before kissing him. “I’m sorry, but this doesn’t sound good. I may have a situation to deal with.”
He feathered kisses down my chin to my neck, his hands roaming the negligee and pulling it up over my ass as he bent down and placed kisses sporadically over my stomach, stopping just above my sex with a tongue filled kiss.
“Fuck, I need you so much,” he said, licking my folds briefly before trailing his kiss back up to my mouth. I stood paralyzed and more turned on than imaginable as he finally closed the robe, tying it tight.
“I’ll head home. I have to walk Trip, anyway.” He slid his tongue along my bottom lip and I opened for him, kissing him feverishly. When he pulled away and clicked on the light, it was like reality set in, bursting our bubble. I sighed and thanked him.
“Go, I’ll blow all these out,” he urged, referring to the candles before he looked back at me with longing. “I love you.”