“I swear he has a twelve pack, and there isn’t an ounce of fat on that body. It’s sickening. Nobody should be that perfect.”
“Twelve pack, huh? So let’s get down to the real grit of the subject: his dick. Well?”
“Nothing special,” I say with a straight face, and I love Jeff’s shocked expression.
“No way. The boy has to be hung. I would bet my daddy’s fortune on that,” Jeff argues.
“I’ve seen worms bigger.” I love that he’s torn between believing me and not.
“Worms? Are you guys going fishing?” A familiar voice makes me freeze, hoping he hasn’t heard more.
“Hey, Drew,” Jeff says. “Take a seat. I was just reminiscing about the last time I went fishing. Dora just told me she hates worms. Despises them, in fact. It’s a girl thing.”
I kick Jeff under the table, hoping he won’t say more. Drew moves in next to me in our booth, his thigh nestled next to mine.
“So, Dora told me about your little volunteer session this morning.” Jeff smiles. “She thoroughly enjoyed having a live model to draw instead of that boring old bowl of fruit.”
I grit my teeth, wanting so badly to smack him upside his goofy grinning head.
“Yeah, it was really fun. When I approached Tim with the idea, he was so excited. I guess this is the first time he’s had a real model come to his class, especially with all the university’s budget cuts.” While gesturing as he talks, Drew brushes his arm up against mine which cause him to grin at me.
So, it probably seems odd that I’m not reacting to him in a positive way. Mostly it’s because I know he’s not really into me, but I also don’t get those funny feelings in my stomach that I get around Colin.
“What’s it like, being naked in front of a class of artists?” Jeff’s question makes me want strangle him. Yes, my blushing mechanism is going full blast, and I quickly grab my cold drink, hoping it helps some.
“It’s something I’m used to, I guess. If you’re shy about nudity in the modeling biz, you don’t last too long. We constantly change in front of a crowd of photographers, makeup artists, directors, agents, and other models. So, modesty is quickly forgotten.”
That wouldn’t work for me. I’ve been naked in front of a select few, but a crowd? No way.
“Dora, how would you feel being naked in front of a group?” Jeff asks, raising one eyebrow, looking all innocent.
“I wouldn’t do it. I’m not a prude, but I like my privacy,” I say in a no-nonsense voice, with thoughts of how I will strangle him running through my mind.
“I wouldn’t want you naked in front of a group, Dora.” Drew nudges my arm, which makes me look up at him. I can tell he’s serious. “There’d be broken jaws and black eyes, and several guys would end up hospitalized.”
“Well, we won’t have to worry about that, now will we?” Why would he be so upset with me naked in front of a group? “Where’s that waitress? I’m starving,” I say, changing the subject as the vision of Drew sitting naked in class revisits my mind.
13
Christmas shopping should only be done online.
There, I said it. Whoever doesn’t like that statement can, well, deal with it. Julie and I are stuck in department store hell checkout lines with a thousand other grumpy people while cheery Christmas music continuously plays from hidden speakers.
Yes, I’m peeved. I haven’t seen Colin for days, and tomorrow is the dreaded ‘graphic sex of Sunday’ dinner. It was supposed to happen last Sunday, but the flu bug hit my family, so I was given a reprieve. No, I’m not happy they had the flu, but I’m hoping and praying that Grandma Alice will have forgotten about the sex book she apparently raved about to all of her friends at bingo.
“Fuck, Dora,” Julie gripes. “This line is fucking taking forever. My feet hurt and I’m thirsty.”
I know she doesn’t say the F word at work, so why can’t she restrain herself out in public? The F word and Christmas music just don’t mesh.
“Calm down, Jules. At least we’re not at the back of the line. In fact, I can’t even see the back of the line.”
“Yeah, that really helps. Oh, look … they’ve opened another register. Hey, what the fuck? That lady was behind us and now she’s being waited on.”
I cover Jules’ mouth, as any minute now she’ll start a riot, and I don’t want to be on the Channel Six news at eleven. Jules nips at one of my fingers and I gently tap her on the head. The people behind us are getting upset. Part of me wants to dump the stuff we have, but I persevere and we finally escape without inciting a riot.
Shivering, we enter the warm confines of the loft’s lobby. Brad is sitting at his post, his hands wrapped around a huge mug of something that is steaming.
“Ooooooh, that looks yummy,” Julie stutters with quivering lips.
“Would you like a cup? It’s a special hot chocolate blend. I have a pot of it in the back.” His grin is so adorable.
“We’ll love you forever, won’t we, Dora?” Julie replies.
Brad jumps off his stool and enters a door behind him. Seconds later, he’s back with two mugs.
“You’re such a lifesaver. Not only did we fight the cold today, we also did our dreaded holiday shopping. You’re awesome.” Julie takes a sip and her eyes close. “Mmmmmm, this is the best.”
I take a drink of mine and have to agree—it’s a chocolate orgasmic experience in my mouth. The ding of the elevator has all of us turning at the same time. My knees go weak as I see Colin standing there with Liam. Colin grins and Liam is, well, it looks kinda like smiling.
“Tis the season,” Colin says.
“Yep. Long lines and evil people, but Brad has fucking saved the day.” Oh, so full of Christmas cheer is Julie.
Liam and Colin look at my face and start laughing.
“You guys, stop that. It’s not funny. You try keeping Ms. Potty Mouth under control. I’ll gladly give you the job.” I glare at them as they continue to laugh. Brad has his hand over his mouth. I’m sure he’s laughing too.
“My mouth is not a toilet. They’re only words, after all.” Julie pretends she’s in a huff, but she loves the attention. “Where are you two hot bods off to?” she continues, and I groan as the two “hot bods” stop laughing, smile, and stand up a little straighter.
With that, I take off toward the stairs, ignoring the foursome. What has me so mad? Julie is just being Julie, after all, and … I don’t know. I haven’t been this confused in my life.
I reach the fourth floor, realizing through rambling thoughts that I’m not out of breath. Pulling open the exit door, I run into a hard object—a really hard object. Raising my eyes, I meet Drew’s smiling ones.
“Whoa, Dora, where’s the fire?” His dimple deepens as his gorgeous grin widens.
“No fire. I felt like climbing the stairs.”
“Lucky stairs,” he replies, staring at my lips as if he wants to devour them.
What the hell? Where did that come from?
Bad boy. Remember, notches on bedposts and all that? I’m so not going to be the millionth and one girl on his list.
“Ha ha, very funny,” I say.
“Ah, Dora, you wound me. Me, who adores you.”
Oh, brother. Time to run—I mean, walk—away right now.
“Love to stand here and chat, Drew, but I think your cohorts are downstairs waiting for you, and I have presents to wrap,” I say, lifting my packages to show him proof.
“I don’t get it. I feel you’re always trying to get rid of me, and it hurts my heart.”
Gently pushing him away with my packages, I start off down the hall. “I’m so sure, Drew,” I reply without even turning to look at him, instead banging on my door. I’m relieved when Jeff immediately opens it.