“Come on, Dora, the nurse is here.” Both Emily and Drew’s father are waiting for me. I’m shocked why they’re still including me, like I’m family or something. Before I have the chance to wonder anymore, Jeff kisses me on the cheek and gently pushes me to join them in pursuit of the nurse down the hallway.
ICU is a scary place. I’m in total shock as Emily and her dad let me go first. It’s like walking into a tomb, but with little beeping and whooshing noises. The nurses walk quietly from one room to another. Rooms are laid out in a semicircle, with a large island in the middle where other nurses sit observing monitors. The nurse who came to get me gestures to a room in the middle of the semicircle, and I prepare myself for what lies beyond the door.
“Now remember,” she says quietly, “he will look different. He’s hooked up to machines by many tubes, and has some bruising.” She made this speech earlier in the waiting room. How could I have forgotten?
I turn the corner into the room, and I don’t recognize the person in the bed. Drew’s face is all bruised and swollen. His leg is in a cast, and there are so many tubes, I can’t begin to count. I wipe the tears from my eyes. I have to be brave. This is the man I love, and I have to help him pull through this.
“Hi, Drew.” I say, taking hold of his hand, hoping against hope that he’ll squeeze it back. I kind of feel silly for talking to him like this, but if they think he can hear me, I don’t care how ridiculous I look. “I’m sorry I ran out on you in Florida. I just felt out of my league. If it makes any difference, my heart has been broken ever since. I think and dream about you. I’ve never in my life ever felt so happy and loved. Yes, I said the L word. I love you, Drew, and deep down I knew it was you on Halloween but I thought you were a bad boy, and the parade of women I’ve seen you with in the magazines, tabloids and on TV made me believe you were a player. I’m so sorry I judged you. I’m wrong, and I want another chance if you’ll let me. Please forgive me. I love you, Drew. I’m not just saying that because you’re in here, and we’re supposed to only say positive things. I really do love you, and I want to be with you until you get tired of me. Please get better soon so we can talk like we were supposed to before this happened. My mom says things happen for a reason, but I don’t understand the reason behind this. I love you, and I’ll keep saying it until you wake up. I love you, Drew.”
“Sorry, time’s up,” a nurse says. “Can I make a suggestion?” She looks at me with kind eyes. “Go home and get some rest and then come back. I promise I’ll call you if anything changes. You have to take care of that baby.”
“How do you know?” I ask, thinking whether I’ve said anything. I’m so tired it could be possible.
“I was watching you on the monitor, and you’ve been rubbing your abdomen the whole time you’ve been talking to him.”
“Nobody knows except my best friend.” I feel a little panicked that my secret will be out before I’m ready.
“I won’t say a word.” She pats my hand and then lets me out of the room. I lean up against the wall, not sure if I can take another step. Just as the thought goes through my mind, I look up and see Jeff standing there waiting for me.
“Come on, we’re going home to get some rest. I’ve told Emily and Mr. Johnson, and they’re going back to the loft to stay a while,” he says while I let him lead me down the hallway.
26
The morning after the accident, my mom showed up at Jeff’s door. I was sound asleep and didn’t wake up until late afternoon, feeling like I had been hit by a truck.
I check the bedside table. My cell is missing. I slowly get out of bed, in deference to my sensitive stomach and crazy equilibrium. That’s when I hear voices and I open my door to see my mom at the kitchen table with Jeff. She gets up and meets me halfway with open arms.
“Mom? What? How?”
“Henry told me. I know he’s supposed to keep quiet about family matters and problems, but I knew something wasn’t right and he gave in after I told him I would start ignoring him all together. I kept getting your voice mail, so I drove down this morning. He told me along the way. No, I didn’t get stopped by the police, and no, your dad didn’t know I was coming. Why didn’t you call me? I’m your mother.” She’s hugging me tightly. I feel like I did when I was a little girl and she would hug away my fears. “Jeff has filled me in. Drew’s going to pull through. From what I’ve found out, he’s in love with my daughter and she’s in love with him too. So with my connections to the other side, I’m pulling out all the stops. My grandbaby will not be fatherless.” She kisses the top of my head as I realize what she just said.
“How do you know? Henry?”
She nods her head. “Of course, I would have known anyway. I’m your mother, after all.” She pulls back and wipes the tears flowing down my cheeks and then gently rubs my abdomen. “Now, pull yourself together. No more crying. Jeff says you haven’t eaten since yesterday morning, so we have to feed you. It’s an old wives’ tale that you’re eating for two. You’re just eating for yourself. That baby will take whatever it needs.”
“You’re not mad?” I ask in disbelief.
“Of course not. You love Drew and he loves you, and you will both love this baby. That’s all that matters.”
From that point on, my life changed. I felt more positive—okay, except for today, the two-week anniversary after the accident.
I make my way into the ICU and see Drew’s doctor having a discussion with his dad and Emily. They look up when they see me through the doors. I walk through, not sure what is waiting for me.
“Ah, Ms. Phillips. I’ve just been telling the Johnsons that we feel it’s time to bring Drew out of the coma. The swelling in his brain has resolved. He should wake up soon. There’s no timetable though. It just depends on how his body shrugs off the remnants of the drugs. We’ll see when he wakes up what, if any, damage was done,” the doctor explains and then leaves us to talk amongst ourselves.
“Dora, you go first. Dad and I will go down to the cafeteria. We haven’t eaten breakfast yet.” Emily kisses my cheek and Drew’s dad pats my back awkwardly. We have come to know each other these last weeks, and we’ve had long talks on why I left the photo shoot that day. I haven’t told them that I’m pregnant yet, or that I love Drew, but they have said he’s loved me from the first minute he saw me. I’ve cried many tears over the time I’ve wasted being so stubborn through all of this. But these two have made me feel like I’m family. Drew’s mother never showed up though. Apparently, she calls Emily once a day for progress reports, but has no plans on coming. Emily and her dad were relieved at the news, and I get the feeling if I met her, I would feel the same way.
How could a mother abandon her children? I touch my stomach. I will never leave you, I say silently to our precious bump.
I walk into Drew’s room and the first thing I notice is there are fewer lines leading into his body. The bruises have turned yellow, and over the last few days, the swelling has drastically diminished. He looks like Sleeping Beauty, except a male version, of course. I wish a kiss would wake him up. A nurse walks in behind me and moves around me to the bed.