Rose entered a few minutes later, carrying a bucket and several large towels, Dorian stood at the door holding an assortment of rags and a second bucket. He kept his eyes averted until Rose had emptied his arms and then he shut the door. Together the two women eased Mordecai onto his side, placing a small pillow under his head so that he could breathe easier. Then they cleaned the blood from the floor as much as possible.
At one point the two women shared a glance and Penny was overcome with a feeling of gratitude. This is what true nobility looks like, she thought, looking upon Rose Hightower. She had never known a noblewoman of such resolve and kindness. “I will not forget what you have done for me,” she said. She knew not what else to say.
“You’ve got blood all over you,” Rose answered, lifting a towel to daub a spot away from Penny’s face. “Do you need my help cleaning him up?”
“No, thank you, I can handle it,” Penny answered her.
Once Rose had left the room she took the second bucket and some of the rags that were still clean and began carefully sponging Mordecai’s body to remove the stains on his skin. It took a while and throughout it all he kept his eyes shut, too weak to protest. After he was as clean as she could manage she went to the mirror and began working on herself.
A few hours later I woke, lying on the cold floor with a small blanket over me. I might have shivered from the cold but Penny was pressed against my back and her warmth had kept the chill from me. I tried to sit up again and the world swayed around me. Another cough started, but I managed to reach the chamber pot this time and avoided making more of a mess.
A warm hand fell upon my arm, “Let me help you back into the bed.” I thought I could manage on my own, but that proved false. Penny wound up lifting me by main force, with her arms under mine. Agony ran through me as my ribs took some of the strain and it gave me strength to help her with my legs. Finally I was in the bed and she drew the covers over me.
“Penny you don’t have to do all this for me.” I spoke to her as she leaned over me, her dark hair falling about her face in a shower of curls. My power of speech amazed even myself. She looked at me oddly then, eyes wide, her face close to mine. Time stopped for a moment then, held in its course by a power I could not understand, till at last she brought her face to mine and kissed me softly.
“I will do as I please Mordecai Eldridge, and neither death, nor dukes, nor doctors will keep me from you.” I might have cried then, but I was far too weak and my body was dry. A thousand responses ran through my mind, but I had neither time nor strength to say them.
“Thank you,” I answered simply, and I closed my eyes again as she slipped into the bed behind me. I wanted to talk to her, to explain many things but instead I fell asleep, safe within her embrace.
I awoke hours later, near dawn. I had somehow managed to roll onto my side, which must have been painful but I didn’t remember doing so. I could feel Penny breathing softly against my neck. Of all my childhood fantasies to think this would happen and I am completely unable to take advantage of it, I thought to myself. I shifted a tiny amount, just enough to give me a better feel of her against me. I’ll admit it, even near dying I’m a dirty dirty man.
After a while I became aware of her looking at me. She had woken quietly and was avoiding moving. She must think I’m still asleep, I realized. “I’m still alive,” I said.
“I know,” she whispered into my ear. Half dead as I was it still sent electric tingles down my spine. She kept her arms around me, and for my part I didn’t complain. Thirty minutes went by and I found I had to ruin the moment.
“Penny…”
“Yes?” she replied.
“I need water, my throat is so dry I can hardly swallow, and then I think I need some privacy for a moment.” My bladder was finally making its demands known, despite loss of blood and lack of fluids. She brought water and I drank an amount that was probably unwise given the state of my stomach. Then she looked at me.
“So how are we going to do this?” she said.
I knew what she meant, “We? I may be an invalid but I’ll be damned before I let you do that with me.” That led to an argument, which I lost, but we finally worked out a compromise. I draped a sheet over myself and stood near the window, leaning against the wall for support. She stayed a few feet behind me, ready to catch me if I started to fall.
Several embarrassing minutes later I was back in the bed. I thought surely at this point she would dress and leave. She still had a job after all. I was wrong; she slid back under the covers next to me. I thought of her kiss the night before and wished dearly I was in better health. The wish fairy ignored me.
We didn’t sleep then, instead we rested, wide awake. Well I did anyway. I’m not sure what her reason for being in the bed was at that point. “The doctor said you would die,” she told me.
“I hope he’s wrong more often then,” I replied. “I think I would have, but I managed to fix some of it last night.” That got her attention, and I spent the next few minutes explaining what I had gone through during the night. After a bit I had a question of my own.
“I think Rose left you a night dress, I saw it on the table,” I hated myself for mentioning it.
“She did.” It was a statement.
“Why aren’t you wearing it?” Stupid never dies, I must be getting better to have regained my idiocy so soon.
“Are you afraid you’ll do more damage to my reputation?” she asked.
That made me tense up, but she still seemed relaxed, “Yes. Wait no, that’s not what I mean.” My general lack of eloquence that always seemed to appear around Penny was back in full force.
“He may have taken my innocence, but I will always have this time, even if only because you were too weak to escape me.” Her voice measured equal parts anger and sadness.
“No he didn’t Penny. I’ve been trying to tell you for days.” I said.
“What? How would you know something like that?” she replied, starting to become angry. I worried this was about to turn into a repeat of our conversation of the previous day. If only I could show her, to get past all the misspoken meanings and misunderstandings. Then an idea hit me. Looking back now, if I had known of the dangers I would not have tried it, especially given my inexperience.
“Let me show you Penny. I think I know a way, do you trust me?” I gave her my most emphatic look, unsure how she would react.
“Magic?” she asked.
I nodded thinking she would surely refuse, but she didn’t.
“Ok, what do I do?” she answered. I rolled over then, which made me ache all over, but I wanted to see her face. Being a complete novice in bed I hadn’t thought of how our arms and legs would work in that situation. Naively I had thought she would simply scoot back a bit to give us room to face one another without having to touch, as in the innocent days of our childhood. Instead she slipped one leg beneath mine and draped her arm across my waist. Thankfully the covers were still drawn, since I was starting to feel well enough that the intimacy caused me to feel a stirring below.
I did my best to suppress those thoughts and took a deep breath. The ache that caused did an excellent job of returning my mind to business. I looked into her eyes before she said, “What next?”
“I need to touch your face for a moment, I think that will be enough.” She nodded at me. I had only learned one word in Lycian regarding the mind, but I thought it might be enough to help me do what I intended. “Mirren,” I said, stretching my mind out to touch hers. I raised my hand to touch her face, but she didn’t wait for that, and as I moved she leaned in, kissing me suddenly.
The world vanished. The sensation was similar to what had happened to me with Marc’s horse but different. There was no sudden plunge as I had experienced then, and I didn’t leave my own body. Instead our minds melted together, co-mingling our thoughts and feelings. I could sense her body in much the same was as my own, but it was still ‘hers’, unlike what had happened before. In one sense it was less complete, yet it was infinitely gentler.