One day, Daitya asked Brishti, “Do you feel like, living with me, that you’re missing out on being with other children?”
She frowned as if this was an absurd question. “I am mekhar atma,” she put a fist to her chest. “My life is here, I don’t need anything else.”
He smiled at her. “I know. But… it’s normal to want to be with others your age.”
She shrugged and looked away, evening light through the panes of the giant’s chest catching the curve of her cheek. “You aren’t with others your age.” He felt these words, sharper than she realized. “I’m not normal. I’m like you. We live to serve the people of the city.”
“You’re a child, Brishti. You shouldn’t have to live to serve—”
Brishti’s head whipped around, eyes wide. “I’m not a child! We are the heart and soul. We are one with god together here, you said,” she said, her voice wobbling.
“Of course you are. Of course we are, I didn’t—”
“You don’t want me to live with you anymore,” she snapped, eyes shining.
“No,” he pleaded. “I could never think of leaving you. But this is not a space for two people to live in. There are opportunities out there.”
“You are mekhar hridaya. You can never leave this body. It’s your home!” Brishti said, shaking her head. “You told me that, you promised. Which means the only solution is for me to leave.”
“I don’t want you to leave. I want you to think of… of a life outside. Outside this giant. I helped build this city, with its forests, these rivers and villages, with this giant. It is not like when I was small, and those without wealth would be doomed to die on the roads, or work for nothing. There are forests to live off, villages to settle and lend your labor to, where you could meet others your age, and grow with them.”
“I will not leave the giant that saved me. The giant won’t abandon me, even if you will, Baba,” she said, not hearing him at all, because she was a teenager, and terrified of losing him.
“Okay, I am sorry,” he said, over and over, and didn’t bring it up again. But he couldn’t forget the look on her face when she looked to other children beyond the shared body of their giant. He couldn’t forget what he had denied himself as a teenager, struggling to survive at the dawn of the age of plagues.
DAITYA CONTACTED GOVERNMENT HQ OVER THE RADIO ONE DAY, WHEN BRISHTI was bathing under the open palms of their giant. They no longer bathed together, because she was too old. Though Brishti had little notion of privacy because of the way they lived, even she would come to appreciate some time alone, or even separated by just the barrier of the giant’s chest, since she had never left the shadow of the giant. She still hummed loudly, by habit, or to assure her father she was outside the giant, still there.
It felt like a betrayal, but Daitya forced himself to tell HQ that he had a daughter now, and that she lived with him.
Their next trip to a mekha depot was their last with their giant.
Daitya lost his home, the body that housed him. He felt a self-loathing so powerful it nearly buckled his legs when Brishti looked at the reclaiming officers at the depot, the realization that the open secret was now no secret at all, that she had become the infection in the giant’s body, expelled along with her father from their place in god’s body.
“Please, please, please, I take very little space, please don’t take away my baba’s home,” she begged the officers. They looked sympathetic but firm behind their masks. Daitya went to tell her the truth, to calm and comfort his daughter and absorb her anger. But he saw her holding on to the giant’s leg, the worn, soiled leg of the body that had been his for so long he couldn’t remember, the body that had saved her life. Brishti, born of a superstorm and a giant. Her face mask had slid off on her tears. Looking at this, Daitya collapsed at his daughter’s feet and broke down in shuddering sobs. Brishti’s own sorrow vanished in concern as she crouched and held him. She had never seen him cry with his body, his tough, exhausted body. Only ever his eyes, when she blamed him for trying to get rid of her. He shook in her arms and begged forgiveness, and she realized what had happened, that he had done the opposite of get rid of her, like she’d feared so many times.
Though she was of the mekha, one of his tribe, he didn’t want her to be. He didn’t want her world restricted to the rib cage of a giant that did not grow with her.
Shorn of his outer body, Daitya the mekha became just a father raising his teenage daughter in a small village in the forest of the Maidan.
Shorn of her outer body, Brishti the mekha became a young woman, taller than her father now and more formidable, a butcher and huntress with bow and machete. Clad in sari and gas mask, she rode out of the forests of central Kolkata on horseback with cryocaches full of meat, out to the less verdant valleys of high-rises, delivering the meat to open-air markets, sending the caches up hoisting cables to the balconies and windows of barirlok.
Though Brishti’s hands remembered the motions controlling a different body, she loved riding horses through the forest paths with her friends, some of whom fell in love with her. She fell in love with some of them. She slept with some of them under the stars, drunk on this private intimacy new to her, thrilled by the mythic danger of tigers that sometimes wandered this deep into the city, annoyed by the real danger of insects.
Sometimes, Brishti’s dreams made of her a giant running through the forest.
With the passage of time, Brishti forgave her father. Her father, who found others to love besides her: the married couple who shared their communal hut. The quiet husband a butcher, and the garrulous wife a garden-farmer. They shared their bed with Daitya, who learned their trades, and shared his body in ways he had never done before. Their daughter, a child, became as a daughter to him, and as a sister to Brishti.
By the grace of god, a family.
BRISHTI GOT OFF HER HORSE AND LOOKED OUT OVER THE MEKHA SCRAPYARD. A graveyard of giants rusting in the rain, sinews overgrown with vines, chests heartless and filled with nests of birds and jackals that flitted across the grounds like spirits. Finally at rest, their limbs sprawled in disarray. Brishti’s contact, looking like a crow in her black cloak and gas mask, pointed the way through the winding labyrinth of bodies. Brishti led her horse carefully, not wanting her to get hurt on the rough ground.
The contact pointed at a giant, still kneeling with dignity, not disrepair. Newly arrived at the yard.
Brishti’s breath hitched. She didn’t have to check the serial number tattooed on the giant’s arm. This body, given of god, once had a heart that had sat behind those open ribs, a heart who became her father, and christened her the soul. It was her body kneeling there in the rain. A retired mekha belonged to no one. She had as much right to it as salvagers and recyclers. Was it fixable? She would take that chance.
Her contact held up two gloved fingers as a reminder. Two goats for a lead on one dead giant. Fair. Brishti nodded, tethering her horse to the broken limb of another mekha. She climbed into the giant’s ribs. Into the dank, dark chest. Her body remembered, traced the neural pathways of her father’s movements across the broken console. She could feel wind whistling through the giant’s body. Breath. Rain pattered on the broken glass of its chest. Of their chest. Brishti remembered her father’s heartbeat as she leaned her head on his chest, after he saved her. Her dear father, who had sacrificed his body for her, the body of his god. This body was no longer his. She understood that now, even if it had taken her a while.