“I haven’t looked yet,” Max replied. “But I don’t hear anything. In fact, it sounds ominously quiet up here.”
“That’s the mice,” the old prospector said.
“I haven’t seen any mice,” Max replied.
“We haven’t got any. That’s what makes them so quiet.”
“Oh.”
99 stretched, reaching up, and Max got hold of her hand, then hauled her up out of the mine. When they were both in the saloon, then looked back down into the tunnel at the old prospector and Madame DuBarry.
“Are you going to join us?” Max asked. “This will be the exciting part coming up. It’s where we good guys foil the bad guys. There’s usually a lot of action.”
“ ’Bout time,” the old prospector said. “But. . I guess I’ll just skip it. I’m not as young as I used to be. Too much excitement isn’t good for me.”
“What, exactly, could happen to you?” Max asked. “After all, you’re already-”
“Max. . don’t ask personal questions,” 99 whispered. “Maybe he’s sensitive about being you-know-what.”
“I don’t know why he should be,” Max said. “Nobody would even guess. He doesn’t look you-know-what.” He addressed the old prospector again. “This is probably good-bye, then,” he said. “We’re going to try to capture the KAOS assassins double-handed. Without the Coolidge-head penny, we have no way of communicating with the Chief. And, after we take them into custody, we’ll want to get them back to Washington as quickly as possible. That won’t leave any time for a formal farewell. So-”
“Max! They’re gone!”
“Yes. Disappeared,” Max nodded, rising. “Well, I don’t blame them. I guess you didn’t notice, 99, but I was sort of working up to a farewell speech. I figured if I wouldn’t have time later, then- But, fortunately, the old prospector saw what was coming and took appropriate action. Now, let’s you and I do the same thing.”
Max and 99 hurried to the door of the saloon. Then, cautiously, they peered out. The dusty streets were deserted.
“We’re in luck, 99,” Max whispered. “They’re probably all over at the hotel packing. Maybe we can take them by surprise.”
“I hope so, Max.”
They crept out of the saloon and carefully made their way toward the hotel, staying close to the buildings, moving slowly and warily, not wanting to make any unnecessary sound. A short time later, they reached the porch of the hotel. There, they stood silently by the doorway for a while, listening. But no sound came from within.
“They’re all upstairs!” Max whispered.
“Max. . do you suppose-”
“Shhhhh!”
Max motioned, then entered the hotel lobby and crossed toward the stairs, with 99 following close behind. When they got to the steps, they halted once more. Max pressed a finger to his lips to warn 99 to be especially quiet. Then, carefully, step by step, they proceeded upward. Soon, they reached the second floor. After a brief pause to take in a deep breath and let it out, they moved on to the first room. With great care, Max opened the door and looked in. The room was empty. He closed the door and they proceeded to the second room. It was empty, too. So was the third room, and the fourth room, and the fifth room, and-
“Max, all of the rooms are empty!” 99 said, ceasing to whisper. “They’ve gone!”
“Let’s not jump to conclusions, 99,” Max said, looking uncomfortable. “Maybe they all just stepped out for a minute. They’re probably all at the corner newsstand. Or perhaps-”
“Max, they’re gone!”
“They could be having breakfast in the dining room, 99.”
“But all the baggage is gone, Max. You mean they took their suitcases to breakfast.”
“Maybe they’re late. Maybe they have to catch a train. Maybe-”
From outside came the whistle of a train.
Then a voice called out. “ ’Board! All Aboard!”
“Max-the train!”
“Hurry, 99!” Max shouted, racing toward the stairs. “That’s our ride back to Washington!”
11
Max and 99 dashed from the hotel and ran up the street to the railroad station. Just as they reached it, they saw the conductor get aboard the train, then enter a car. Max and 99 jumped aboard, too. Max, with 99 right behind him, threw open the door of the car. Facing him, smiling cordially, was the conductor, who was pointing a pistol at him.
“Sorry,” Max said briskly, “but I’ve got to keep up the momentum. If I slow down, I’ll miss the beat, and then I’ll have to start at the beginning again-dum, dum, de, dum, dum, dum!”
On the final “dum,” Max swung his arm and delivered a karate chop to the wrist of the conductor. The gun clattered to the floor. As the conductor reached for it, Max dum, dum, de, dum, dum, dummed once more, and, at the same time, drove a knee into the conductor’s chest, flipping him over backwards. The conductor landed on his back-flat. From that position, he peered at Max Wearily, while Max picked up the pistol.
“Sorry, again,” Max said.
“Don’t apologize,” the conductor replied. “It was worth it to hear a great sound like that.” Then he collapsed, unconscious.
“Where to now, Max?” 99 asked.
“To find Arbuthnot,” Max answered, moving forward along the aisle, now in possession of the gun.
“But, Max, it’s a long train,” 99 said, following him again. “And we don’t know where he is.”
“Logic will take us to him, 99,” Max said. “We know he’s just concluded a grueling few days. This seminar has probably sapped every ounce of physical and mental energy he had. So, now, he’ll be resting. Or, as the railroad men say, lounging. Consequently, I’m fairly positive that we’ll find him in the lounge car.”
“Max, I think you’re probably right. But. . why are we going this way?”
Max halted. “To the lounge car, 99. I just explained that. Remember the part about every sap being grueled after all- No, I mean about-”
“Max, I know,” 99 broke in. “What I meant was, the lounge car is located in the other direction. You’re heading toward the engine.”
“Logic only tells where, it doesn’t tell how to get there, 99,” Max said. Then he turned and led the way in the other direction. “Now, when we get there and find Arbuthnot relaxing alone in the lounge car,” Max said, “I’ll rush in and overpower him and-”
“Max, you have a pistol now,” 99 pointed out.
“Oh.” He looked at the gun in his hand. “Yes, that’s right, I do. All right, then, I’ll saunter in and get the drop on him. Then I’ll order him to summon all the other KAOS assassins, and we’ll keep them prisoner in the lounge car until we get back to Washington. How does that sound to you, 99?”
“Who’ll drive the train, Max?”
“The train driver.”
“But he’s a KAOS agent, Max. Won’t he-”
“All right, I’ll drive the train, 99. It couldn’t be too difficult. I mean, there are those tracks to follow. And the route is probably very well marked.”
“But who will keep the KAOS assassins prisoner?”
“You will, 99. I’ll give you the gun and you- Oh-oh, here we are, 99. This next car is the lounge car. Stay here-I’ll go peek in and make sure Arbuthnot is in there.” Leaving 99, Max crept forward. When he reached the door of the lounge car he opened it a crack and looked in. Then he closed it and returned to where 99 was waiting. “This is going better than I expected,” he said. “We won’t have to get Arbuthnot to summon all the KAOS assassins to the lounge car. They’re all in there now.”
“Max! All of them? That’s an awful lot of KAOS assassins for just two of us to handle.”
“99, don’t worry. We’ve got the momentum going. Just keep up the rhythm and we can’t fail. Now. . ready? Dum, dum, de, dum, dum, dum!”
Max and 99 advanced to the door of the lounge car. Max repeated the beat-dum, dum, de, dum, dum, dum-then he flung open the door and he and 99 rushed in, catching Arbuthnot completely by surprise.
“Dum, dum, dum, de- Ooops! Uh, dum, de, dum- No, it goes, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum-”