Megan frowned at her. “Why?” “I like puzzles.”
“I don't think it's much of a puzzle, but if it's all right with the family, I don't have any objection.” She leaned back, sighed. “Sorry, I just can't eat any more.”
“It's okay,” Nathaniel switched his empty plate with hers. “I can.”
To Megan's amazement, he could. It wasn't much of a surprise that Kevin had managed to clean his plate. The way he was growing he often seemed in danger of eating china and all when he sat down for a meal. But Nathaniel ate his meal, then half of hers, without a blink.
“Have you always eaten like that?” Megan asked when they were driving away from the restaurant.
“Nope. Always wanted to, though. Never could seem to fill up as a kid.” Of course, that might have been because there was little to fill up on. “At sea, you learn to eat anything, and plenty of it, while it's there.”
“You should weigh three hundred pounds.”
“Some people burn it off.” He shifted his eyes to hers. “Like you. All that nervous energy you've got just eats up those calories.”
“I'm not skinny,” she muttered.
“Nope. Thought you were myself, till I got ahold of you. It's more like willowy—and you've got a real soft feel to you when you're pressed up against a man.”
She hissed, started to look over her shoulder.
“He conked out the minute I turned on the engine,” Nathaniel told her. And, indeed, she could see Kevin stretched out in the back, his head pillowed on his arms, sleeping soundly. “Though I don't see what harm there is for the boy to know a man's interested in his mother.”
“He's a child.” She turned back, the gentle look in her eyes gone. “I won't have him think that I'm—”
“Human?”
“It's not your affair. He's my son.”
“That he is,” Nathaniel agreed easily. “And you've done a hell of a job with him.”
She slanted him a cautious look. “Thank you.”
“No need to. Just a fact. It's tough raising a kid on your own. You found the way to do it right.”
It was impossible to stay irritated with him, especially when she remembered what Coco had told her. “You lost your mother when you were young. Ah... Coco mentioned it.”
“Coco's been mentioning a lot of things.”
“She didn't mean any harm. You know how she is, better than I. She cares so much about people, and wants to see them...”
“Lined up two by two? Yeah, I know her. She picked you out for me.” “She—” Words failed her. “That's ridiculous.”
“Not to Coco.” He steered easily around a curve. “Of course, she doesn't know that I know she's already got me scheduled to go down on one knee.”
“It's fortunate, isn't it, that you're forewarned?”
Her indignant tone had a smile twitching at his lips. “Sure is. She's been singing your praises for months. And you almost live up to the advance publicity.”
She hissed like a snake and turned to him. His grin, and the absurdity of the situation, changed indignation to amusement. “Thank you.” She stretched out her legs, leaned back and decided to enjoy the ride. “I'd hate to have disappointed you.”
“Oh, you didn't, sugar.”
“I've been told you're mysterious, romantic and charming.”
“And?”
“You almost live up to the advance publicity.”
“Sugar—” he took her hand and kissed it lavishly “—I can be a lot better.”
“I'm sure you can.” She drew her hand away, refusing to acknowledge the rippling thrill up her arm. “If I wasn't so fond of her, I'd be annoyed. But she's so kind.”
“She has the truest heart of anyone I've ever met. I used to wish she was my mother.”
“I'm sorry.” Before she could resist the urge, Megan laid a hand on his. “It must have been so hard, losing your mother when you were only a child.”
“It's all right. It was a long time ago.” Much too long for him to grieve. “I still remember seeing Coco in the village, or when I'd tag along with Holt to take fish up to The Towers. There she'd be, this gorgeous womanlooked like a queen. Never knew what color her hair would be from one week to the next.”
“She's a brunette today,” Megan said, and made him laugh.
“First woman I ever fell for. She came to the house a couple times, read my old man the riot act about his drinking. Guess she thought if he was sober he wouldn't knock me around so much.” He took his eyes off the road again, met hers. “I imagine she mentioned that, too?”
“Yes.” Uncomfortable, Megan looked away. “I'm sorry, Nathaniel. I hate when people discuss me, no matter how good their intentions. It's so intrusive.”
“I'm not that sensitive, Meg. Everybody knew what my old man was like.” He could remember, too well, the pitying looks, the glances that slid uneasily away. “It bothered me back then, but not anymore.”
She struggled to find the right words. “Did Coco-did it do any good?”
He was silent a moment, staring out at the lowering sun and the bloodred light it poured into the water. “He was afraid of her, so he beat the hell out of me when she left.”
“Oh, God.”
“I'd just assume she didn't know that.”
“No.” Megan had to swallow the hot tears lodged in her throat. “I won't tell her. That's why you ran away to sea, isn't it? To get away from him.”
“That's one of the reasons.” He reached over, ran a fingertip down her cheek. “You know, if I'd figured out the way to get to you was to tell you I'd taken a strap a few times, I'd have brought it up sooner.”
“It's nothing to joke about.” Megan's voice was low and furious. “There's no excuse for treating a child that way.”
“Hey, I lived through it.”
“Did you?” She shifted back to him, eyes steady. “Did you ever stop hating him?”
“No.” He said it quietly. “No, I didn't. But I stopped letting it be important, and maybe that's healthier.” He stopped the car in front of The Towers, turned to her. “Someone hurts you, in a permanent way, you don't forget it. But the best revenge is seeing that it doesn't matter.”
“You're talking about Kevin's father, and it's not at all the same. I wasn't a helpless child.”
“Depends on where you draw the line between helpless and innocent.” Nathaniel opened the car door. “I'll carry Kevin in for you.”
“You don't have to.” She hurried out herself, but Nathaniel already had the boy in his arms.
They stood there for a moment, in the last glow of the day, the boy between them, his head resting securely on Nathaniel's shoulder, dark hair to dark hair, honed muscle to young limbs.
Something locked deep inside her swelled, tried to burst free. She sighed it away, stroked a hand over her son's back and felt the steady rhythm of his breathing.
“He's had a long day.”
“So have you, Meg. There are shadows under your eyes. Since that means you didn't sleep any better than I did last night, I can't say I mind seeing them there.”
It was hard, she thought, so very hard, to keep pulling away from the current that drew her to him. “I'm not ready for this, Nathaniel.”
“Sometimes a wind comes up, blows you off course. You're not ready for it, but if you're lucky, you end up in a more interesting place than you'd planned.”
“I don't like to depend on luck.”
“That’s okay. I do.” He shifted the boy more comfortably, and carried him to the house.
Chapter 6
“I don't see what all the damn to-do's about,” Dutch grumbled as he whipped a delicate egg froth for his angel food cake surprise.