“So’s that make ya’ an airhead?”
“Dammit, I’m serious,” I growled.
“Jeezus, lighten up, Row. I know ya’ get kinda hard ta’ deal with whenever you’re workin’ a case, but damn…”
“I’m sorry, Ben, but I’m just not in the mood to joke around. And, I’m not working this case.”
“Yeah…okay, whatever.”
“I’m serious.”
“Then why didn’t ya’ just stay in your room?” he asked.
“Because you wouldn’t answer your goddamned phone. Otherwise I would have told you exactly what I’m telling you now.”
He shrugged. “Okay, well since you’re already here, might as well give it a go anyway…”
“What? Are you not listening? Exactly what is it you want from me?” I asked.
“The usual. Your help on the case.”
“Okay, I’m asking you again… Did you not hear what I just said? The visions disappeared last night, and that hasn’t miraculously changed in the past eight hours.” I raised my volume a notch and stressed the enunciation of the last four words, “ I… Can’t… Help… You.”
He nodded. “I ain’t deaf, Row. I ain’t a moron either. I just talk like one to throw people off. Listen, I get what you’re sayin’. But you want this bitch stopped, right?”
“Of course,” I returned, a fresh wisp of incredulity woven through my voice. “What the hell kind of question is that?”
“It’s the kinda question I ask ta’ get your attention whenever you’re rampin’ up ta’ be an asshole,” he replied with a slightly harsher edge. “Zactly like you’re doin’ right now for instance. Now, if you wanna play Mister Serious, okay, I can do that, so listen up. Whether the Twilight Zone thing is workin’ for ya’ right now or not doesn’t matter. I don’t give a shit about that.” He wagged his finger back and forth between Felicity and me. “Simple fact is the two of ya’ know more about Miranda and how she does whatever the hell it is she does than anyone else around. Plain and simple. And, right now, the MCS needs that input from you. End of story. Got me?”
“Okay, fine. But I’m telling you up front, I really don’t think I’m up to this, Ben.”
He huffed out an annoyed sigh then shook his head and stared at me for a moment. Finally, he splayed out his hands in mock surrender and asked, “What the hell’s goin’ on with you, Row?”
“Do you really have to ask?” I snapped.
“Yeah,” he replied. “‘Cause I just don’t get it. You sure as hell ain’t actin’ like the Rowan Gant I used ta’ know.”
“Well, think about what I’ve been through, then ask yourself what’s wrong with me.”
“Yeah, look, you think I don’t know what you’ve had ta’ deal with? I realize you’re a victim here, trust me, nobody’s disputin’ that fact. But I also know that ain’t somethin’ new where you’re concerned. And I gotta be honest, I’ve never seen ya’ play the ‘pity me’ part. Up till now, that is.”
“Maybe I’ve just finally had enough.”
He nodded. “Okay, I’ll buy that. I’ve heard ya’ say it before, but fine, maybe you’re for real this time, so I’ll go along with ya’. We all get burned out, and I’m not surprised if you really are. Hell, I’ve been worried about ya’ more’n once. You know that.
“But, guess what? This ain’t over, and you ain’t off the clock yet. At least not until this one’s done. You can’t walk away from it, and you know that as well as I do.”
“Dammit, Ben.”
“Go ahead and damn me all ya’ want if it makes ya’ happy. But we need ya’ on this. Felicity needs ya’ on this. Hell, you need you on this.”
“Okay, fine,” I conceded. “But I’m still not sure how much good I can do.”
“Like I said, you know how Miranda works. Besides, you’re the only one who’s broken, ain’t ya?” He turned his gaze toward Felicity and said, “I mean, I know you ain’t quite as tuned in as Row, you still got the whole woo-woo thing happenin’, right Firehair?”
“No way!” I spat before she could answer him. I hadn’t exactly been keeping my voice down during this conversation, but now it rose in volume by several notches. “Dammit, Ben, no friggin’ way. I said I’d help you, but you aren’t dragging Felicity into this, do you understand me?! I won’t allow it!”
“I beg your pardon?” my wife interjected. Her comment was clearly aimed at me, but I was focused on Ben and all but ignored it.
“Excuse me,” a new and unfamiliar voice sharply insinuated itself into our conversation.
I looked toward it and found a middle-aged woman in a neatly pressed business suit glaring at us. Based on where she was standing, she had likely approached from the side that was partially obscured by a row of large potted plants. Her gold nametag identified her as the front desk manager.
“We bein’ too loud?” Ben grunted.
She nodded. “You could say that. Are all of you guests here at the hotel?”
“They are,” Ben said, waving his finger at us. Then he withdrew his badge case and flipped it open to display his credentials. “I’m just their ride.”
She glanced at Felicity and me with an air of quickly rising suspicion as she noticeably took a step back from us. Returning her gaze to Ben she asked, “Is there a problem, officer…”
“Storm. Detective Storm,” he answered, sliding the case back into his pocket. “No. No problem, really. Just a discussion that got a bit outta hand is all. Sorry ‘bout that.”
“I see,” she replied with a nod then carefully choosing her words said, “Well, if I could ask that you either tone it down a bit or take the discussion elsewhere, I’m sure our other guests would appreciate it.”
He nodded. “Yeah. We can do that. Sorry again.”
As she walked away, my friend turned back to me with a frown then clamped a large hand on my shoulder and leaned in while pulling me a bit closer. In a low tone he said, “See what I mean about you rampin’ up to asshole intensity? Now, number one, calm your ass down before the hotel kicks you outta here. Number two, I hate ta’ tell ya’ this, Row, but I ain’t draggin’ Felicity anywhere. In case you’ve forgotten, whether ya’ like it or not, she’s already in this shit just as deep as you. Maybe even deeper.”
“Aye, he’s right, Rowan,” Felicity said. “I am.”
“That’s different,” I objected, although much less boisterously than before.
“Only in your eyes, because as usual, you’re trying to protect me,” she replied. “Besides, I’m the one she’s after. And there’s something else you may have forgotten… What I do is ultimately my decision, not yours.”
“Dammit, Felicity,” I grumbled.
“You know I’m right,” she said, softening her voice to a soothing tone. Still, the stern intent was there, and I knew I’d best give in.
I was only two hours into my day, and already it wasn’t favoring me in the least. I huffed out a heavy sigh and told her, “Yes, you are. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
“Aye, that’s true. No more than I like it when you do the same to me then.”
On that point, I couldn’t even begin to argue. Over the years I’d seesawed between embracing my curse and trying to ignore it completely. The attempts to deny it never lasted long, and when all was said and done, I would put myself right into the middle of the strife, no matter what anyone else said. Unfortunately, it didn’t always end well, and Felicity was the one charged with picking up the pieces and putting me back together. I fully realized that task exacted its own kind of toll; still, that didn’t mean I wanted her to trade places with me.
But, now that I’d finally come to terms with accepting my unwanted abilities as an ever-present part of my life, they had been unceremoniously taken away. Since I had no real inkling of exactly how Miranda had done this to me, I was at a loss as to how to circumvent or change it, which left me standing on unfamiliar ground.
Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would find myself silently begging the universe to re-open a door I’d been trying to shut for what seemed like a huge slice of forever. And in keeping with the status quo, today was no different than all of those before it because my pleas were apparently still falling upon deaf ears.