His dad slightly moved his head signaling “No” as if there was something more important for him to do. Struggling to talk, he said, “Son, I love you so much. There is nothing more important to me than you and your mom. I hope you feel I was a good father.”
Tears started to appear in his dad’s eyes. Peter continued to squeeze his hand. “You were the best. There is nothing I would change.” Peter leaned over and gave his father a kiss on his forehead and whispered, “Dad, I love you so much.”
Peter sat back down and a stern look came across his father’s face.
“Damn those Chinese Bastards!” His dad’s face seemed to tighten up and he winced in pain.
“Don’t get all worked up,” Peter said as he patted his father’s hand, trying to settle him down.
His dad closed his eyes for a moment as if to calm himself, then slowly opened them again and looked directly into Peter’s. His breathing was now louder as he struggled more. His dad’s hand started to tremble as he slowly opened it and something dropped into Peter’s. “This is for you. It signifies what is important to me, but part of its luster is gone. Maybe you can change that.”
His dad closed his eyes and cringed in pain. His whole body tightened up and he squeezed Peter’s hand with what must have been all his strength, the item he had given Peter pressed in between.
“Hold on, Dad,” Peter said in desperation.
His dad, in obvious pain, opened his eyes and whispered in a frail voice, “Peter, take care of your mother for me.” With those last words, his father closed his eyes again, but this time his whole body went limp. His hand lost all strength and stopped squeezing. His dad for that brief moment seemed at peace, as if he had said what he wanted to say before giving up the fight.
Peter cried out, “Dad, don’t go!” Screeching alarms began blaring in the room, Peter looked up to see the line on the heart monitor had reduced to small blips below the center line. Peter stood over his dad and squeezed his hand harder. “Dad! Hold on!”
Two nurses rushed in, the male nurse pushing Peter out of the way as he ripped off his dad’s blanket and gown before starting chest compressions. The female nurse studied the monitor before calling out, “He’s in V-Fib.” She then snatched a bag off the wall that had a mask and put it to his dad’s mouth. Two other nurses came running in, one pushing a cart, the other grabbing Peter, stating he needed to go back to the lobby. The nurse turned him and steered him toward the door. Commotion and noise went on all around him. He looked back at his father one last time before leaving. His father seemed to have a small grin on his face, a look that was not there before, as if he were now in a better place. This comforted Peter as he walked through the door. A doctor rushing in, bumped him. The nurse escorting Peter turned her attention to the doctor, updating him. She seemed to forget all about Peter.
Peter walked out of the room, but instead of walking to the lobby, he turned and walked a few steps along the glass wall, and froze as he looked in. The room seemed to be in organized chaos. All the nurses were running around the small room doing a particular job, doing what they could to save his dad. Peter noticed two white pads were now attached to his dad’s chest. He heard a nurse yell, “charged.” The doctor, facing some equipment with his back to his father, turned toward the nurses and waved his arm through the air before shouting, “Clear!” The doctor then flipped a switch.
Peter saw his father’s body bounce up off the bed and assumed he was given an electrical shock. Everyone in the room paused to study the heart monitor, which Peter could see. He lightly tapped the glass as he whispered, “Come on, Dad, you can do it.”
Peter bit his lower lip as it looked like the blips on the heart monitor had increased. But his heart sank when he saw the doctor shrug and shake his head. The doctor barked out, “Resume chest compressions.” That was the last sound he heard before one of the nurses closed the door. It was odd watching all this commotion unfolding in front of him, yet unable to hear anything, like a silent horror film. Peter had to turn away, wishing he would wake up from this nightmare.
He closed his eyes and said a short prayer. God, if it is time, please watch over Dad. Thank you for blessing me as his son. He turned back to see the doctor wave his arm one more time before clicking the switch behind him and his dad’s limped body jumped again. Everyone stared at the monitor, but this time the line was flat. The doctor put up his hands in defeat. A sickening feeling of certainty began to overtake Peter as he accepted he had lost his dad.
Peter leaned against the glass with both hands, tears rolling down his cheek. A pinch and slight weight in his hand reminded him of the memento his dad had given him. He pulled the hand from the glass and gradually opened his fingers. Through the tears he saw the locket his mom had given his dad when he returned from the moon. His father treasured that locket with all his heart and always wore it. Knowing how important the locket was and what it stood for brought a smile to Peter’s face. He lightly stroked the crucifix on the outside. He opened it and looked at a copy of the family picture his dad left on the moon. His dad always told Peter he left the picture behind to symbolize how important his family was to him, and how he would have never walked on the moon if not for them. He said the picture would sit there on the lunar surface undisturbed for all eternity. Peter read the inscription on the locket’s inside cover written in 1972:
9:45 pm
From your #1 Support Crew.
The time 9:45 p.m. signified when his dad first stepped on the moon in Texas time. This locket represented everything that was important to his dad; God, family and his NASA career.
Peter closed the locket before wiping the tears from his face, remembering what his dad said when he passed it to him. “Part of its luster is gone.” Because of those damn Chinese. But I can change this! As he considered taking on the operation, he quickly remembered it was a suicide mission and reflected on his dad’s last request, “Take care of your mother.” How can I do that if I accept the assignment?
Peter lifted his head and looked back into the room. Everyone was now moving much slower, no longer in a rush. He took one last look at his father as he lay there peacefully and whispered to himself, “Dad, what do you want me to do?”
The door opened as a nurse walked out, allowing Peter to overhear the doctor say, “mark time of death at 9:45 p.m.” Peter gasped. Wow, the same time as when he walked on the moon. He looked back down and opened the locket, rereading 9:45 p.m. Feeling this was a sign he was looking for, he glanced back at his dad and with an unexpected sense of purpose whispered, “Don’t worry, Dad. I’ll prove those Chinese wrong!”
12
A GOOD MAN
The Tuesday after Memorial Day dawned bright and sunny, the type of late spring day Peter’s dad loved in Houston. Peter was helping his mom and Aunt Virginia with the final touches at their home for his dad’s wake, to be held later that day after the funeral. They were already dressed for the service, Peter even wearing a coat and tie in his dad’s honor. The last five days were a blur. Not only was Peter dealing with his dad’s sudden death and helping his mom through this tough time, he was also starting to get ready for the ultimate and final mission of his life.
Peter called Gavin soon after leaving the hospital to inform him he would accept the mission in his dad’s honor. Gavin offered his condolences and said he was both pleased and saddened by Peter’s acceptance. Though Gavin never met Tom, he knew of his accomplishments and always spoke highly of him around Peter. The president had given the mission the go. Gavin said he had mixed feelings about Peter accepting the assignment, especially so soon after his father’s death. Peter assured him it would not have any impact on his success in accomplishing the mission. In fact, it motivated him even more. Understanding this, Gavin still hated losing one of his best agents. He asked if Peter wanted another agent to accompany him, stating he had a few in mind. Peter had already considered Gavin’s offer prior to the call and knowing the specifics of the mission had decided there was just as good a chance of success going alone as with another agent, so he declined.